Crazy (The Gibson Boys #4)(59)

“Of course you are. I’m here to help break all that down.”

I bite a fingernail, mulling everything over.

“Dylan. Stop it.”

“I just …” I drop my hand. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t wrap my head around it.”

She wiggles her eyebrows. “But could you wrap your hand around it?”

I throw the pillow at her.

Laughing, she hands it back to me. “What’s the problem? Honestly. What are you all hung up about?”

“It’s like … now what? He’s great. We’ve slept together. I freaking live there. There’s no way, no way, Navie, this can end well.”

“And why the hell not?”

I spring to my feet and walk around the little room. Days ago, my stuff was stacked in the corner of this space. Days ago, I was waiting to strike out on my own. Days ago, I had a clear picture of what the next phase of my life would look like, but now I don’t freaking know.

“Look,” I say, stopping next to the television. “Peck was gone when I got up.”

She thinks. “He goes to church every week. I bet he didn’t want to wake you up.”

“Maybe. But the point is, I haven’t had time to talk to him, to even see him, since about five minutes after he pulled his cock out of me. And by that, I mean I don’t know what he’s thinking.”

“Probably that you looked like an angel in his bed and he wanted to leave with that imagery,” she offers, speaking slowly. “Like you said, you’re overthinking. Breathe. Relax. Go make yourself some tea.”

I shake my head. “If I go back and things are weird, do you know how awkward that will be?”

“Pretty damn awkward.” She gets to her feet. “But I highly doubt that’s what’s going to happen.”

“Fine. What if I go back and he’s like, ‘You are the love of my life’?”

She laughs. “Also highly doubt that’s what’s gonna happen.”

“Gee, thanks.” I bury my head in my hands. “I just feel like this happened so naturally and so fast that I’ve lost all perspective.” I look up at her. “A few days ago, he was professing his love for Molly, according to you.”

“He was lying,” she scoffs. “You’ve given him a taste of the real thing. He probably doesn’t even remember who she is.”

I roll my eyes but give her a smile.

This is why Navie is my best friend. She knows what to say and always has the utmost confidence in me. I love her.

I sit back down again. My feet curl up beneath me as I try to settle my thoughts into a more manageable stream.

“Okay. Here’s the thing,” I say slowly. “I did what I always do—I jumped in too fast. I threw caution to the wind and—”

“And there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“No, there’s not. Except for the fact that now I have to deal with the consequences.” I frown. “Peck seems like a really good idea. A damn good one. But … am I prepared to deal with a man right now? One who may or may not have an unrequited love for a very specific woman?”

Navie holds up a finger, heading toward the kitchen. It gives me a small moment to consider things about Molly.

Unrequited love isn’t really true, I guess. Peck told me he’d love Molly forever, but after our talk the other night, I know he’s reassessing how he loves her and what that love means. But it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s emotionally available for me. I mean, Peck’s a virile man, and I’m sure he’s slept with many women over the years.

And they’ve never amounted to anything.

Gah! Brain, stop thinking.

Navie comes back with a glass of tea, handing it to me and then sitting on the couch.

“If it’s what he wanted—to try to see what was between us, if anything, and it could stay so easy breezy, I could go for it. But if it’s going to get all complicated and I have to jockey for a position with Molly, I … I don’t wanna do that, Navie.”

“I get it.”

“But I also don’t want to sleep with a guy who I could be good friends with otherwise and screw it all up because of the actual screwing.” I blow out a breath. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

Navie leans forward, putting her hands on my knees. She looks me right in the eye. “Yes, you should’ve. Because you have to learn to trust yourself. Something in your brain told you it was okay to let your guard down, and you have to trust that voice.”

“But that voice has led me astray before.”

She grins. “Even inner voices have bad days.” She sits back again. “You need to calm down and stop thinking about all the bad things that might happen and focus on all the good that’s possible.”

“Like …?”

“Lots of orgasms, from the sound of it.”

I laugh. “Girl …”

She laughs too. “See? And what if this whole thing turns out to be something good. Then what? Then you’ll kick yourself for doubting it in the first place.”

I take a sip of the tea and try to do as instructed. I try to relax.

My body is still buzzing from last night. My muscles ache, and some feel stretched. It’s a lovely feeling and would be even better if I could kick this mental silliness.