Commonwealth(79)

“If it hadn’t been for that bee I feel sure he would have died when he was seven, but somehow I understood exactly what had happened. I was up and out the door like lightning. I had him in the car in two seconds. It isn’t far to the hospital, you know that, and in those days there wasn’t half the traffic. I just kept telling him to slow down, slow down and concentrate on breathing.”

“What did you do with the rest of them?” Caroline said.

“I left them there. I don’t think I even closed the door. Bert was so mad at me when I told him what had happened. I was scared to death at the time, but really I was proud of myself too. I’d saved Cal’s life! Bert said, you can’t leave children alone like that. You should have put them in the car. But Bert wasn’t there, and he thought I was a terrible mother anyway. If I’d rounded up all those kids and thrown them in the car Cal would have died. The doctor told me so. He told me how serious a bee sting was for Cal, and how the next time it would be even worse. But you can’t keep a boy inside for the rest of his life, at least not a boy like Cal. I was always on him about carrying his pills, and I had a vial of epinephrine and a syringe in the house, but Bert hadn’t brought the epinephrine to his parents’ house, and I doubt they would have known how to give the shot anyway. No one ever checked to make sure Cal had his pills.” Teresa shook her head. “I don’t blame Bert though. I used to but I don’t anymore. The things you really need are never there when you need them. I know that. It could have happened when he was home with me.”

“There’s no protecting anyone,” Fix said, and reached over from his wheelchair to put his hand on hers. “Keeping people safe is a story we tell ourselves.”

“Bert swore he was going to cut down the orange trees in the back. They’re always covered in bees when they’re in bloom. He was in a rage about those trees, like they had done this to his son, but after a couple of days he forgot all about them. We all did.”

She stopped and looked around the place they were now. “The emergency room was in the back of the hospital in those days. It’s a lot nicer now. All of this is new.”

After the CAT scan and an examination, the doctor came out to talk to them. “Mr. Cousins?” he said to Fix.

“Nope,” Fix said.

This didn’t seem to trouble the doctor a bit. He was there to relay the news and so he went ahead. “It looks like Mrs. Cousins has a diverticular abscess in her sigmoid colon. We’re going to cool things down with antibiotics, give her something to keep her comfortable. We’ll watch her white blood count and fever through the night. Keep her NPO, then we’ll reexamine her in the morning and see how she’s doing. Has she been sick very long?”

Caroline looked at Franny. “Maybe three days?” Franny said.

The doctor nodded. He made a note in the file he carried, told them she had been transferred to a room, and then excused himself. They imagined him imagining their neglect. Why hadn’t they brought such a sick old woman to him sooner? There was no point in explaining themselves.

“Not cancer,” Teresa said to the Keatings when they came to tell her goodbye. “But it still looks like I’m going to have to spend the night.” She had a heart monitor now, an IV dripping into the back of her hand.

“Lucky you,” Fix said. He was happy for her.

“Oh,” Teresa said, touching her untethered hand to her forehead. “Cancer. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. They’re giving me morphine now. I’m loopy.”

Fix gave a little wave to say it meant nothing.

“I’ll come back later tonight and check on you,” Franny said.

Teresa told her not to. “I talked to Albie. He’ll be here first thing in the morning. I’m going to sleep straight through until then. To tell you the truth I’m very tired. And anyway, you’ve come out here to be with your father, not me. I’ve eaten up half your day.”

“I just wish you could have had all of it,” Caroline said. “The second half was definitely better than the first.”

“We can wait here until you go to sleep,” Fix said, feeling both chivalrous and uncertain. He’d been in the wheelchair too long. He needed to get home and into his recliner. It had felt good to take someone else to the hospital for a change, to think of Teresa’s condition rather than his own. But pain was only going to be ignored for so long. It had come back on him with a baseball bat.

“I’m closing my eyes now. By the time you get to the door I’ll be asleep.” She smiled at Fix in his wheelchair and then, true to her word, closed her eyes. She should have married Fix Keating, that’s what she was thinking when sleep wrapped her up in its soft arms. Fix Keating was a good man. But he was sick now, and she was sick. How was she going to be able to take care of him?

Caroline and Franny wheeled Fix down to the elevator. They were in a different part of the hospital now, having come in through the emergency room and then traveled to the other side of the world to get to the patient rooms. When they came outside they were someplace they’d never seen before and it took Caroline a while to find the car. By the time they got the wheelchair in the trunk and found the exit to the parking lot, Fix was asleep in the front seat, leaving Franny to put the address to the Santa Monica house into her phone.

Neither Caroline nor Franny said anything for a long time. Maybe they were each waiting to be sure their father wasn’t going to hear them, but why? What had they done? Fix’s head fell back against the headrest. His mouth was open. If he hadn’t been snoring very lightly they might have wondered if he was dead.