Claiming Sarah (Ace Security #5)(26)

“Don’t do that. Not with me. I know it’s in your nature to be nice, but I don’t want nice Sarah. I want the real Sarah. Tell me to piss off when I’m being an ass . . . because Lord knows there will be plenty of times when I’ll be one. Disagree with me when we’re having a philosophical conversation, tell me which side of the bed you prefer to sleep on, and for God’s sake, when we’re watching television together, don’t just watch whatever I want because you want to please me—because then we’ll probably never watch anything other than football and hockey.”

He’d purposely tried to shock her, especially with the bed comment, to get her to open up.

Sarah gave him a weak smile. “Jackson used to tell me that I needed to speak my mind more often.”

“It sounds like he was a very smart man.”

“He was.” She took a deep breath and stared down at the empty plate in front of her for a long moment. Cole didn’t rush her, gave her time to think. He was rewarded when she looked up at him and said softly, “I’m more grateful for the help from your friends than I can say. They did more to make me feel as if I’m not alone in dealing with all this in one short meeting than the police ever have, but . . . deep down, I’m still scared. Every time I drive up to my house, I wonder if there’ll be another gift. Or if maybe today’s the day he’s done with the presents, and he’s going to be inside my house, ready to grab me or something.”

Sarah looked away from him again and bit her lip. Reacting without thought, Cole brought a hand up to her face and gently freed her lip from her teeth.

Her eyes met his in surprise. But she took a deep breath and continued. “And now I’m confused after hearing about Owen’s disability payments. I don’t know if I should be relieved, like maybe he’s not as much of a threat as I’d thought. That he’s got some sort of disability that explains his behavior . . . or if I should be even more worried because it could be something that makes him more dangerous. But ultimately . . . I’m terrified that I’m going to disappear one day and no one will ever find me. It happens more often than we know. People up and disappear and aren’t ever seen again.”

Cole couldn’t stand it anymore; he scooted his chair back and reached for Sarah. He gently pulled her out of her chair and onto his lap. Her legs hung to the side, and his arms banded around her, one hand on her hip, the other tangled in the hair at the base of her neck, his arm supporting her back at the same time.

“You bet your ass if you disappear, I’m going to find you. And I think being scared is normal and probably somewhat healthy at this point. Not that I like that you’re frightened, but it’ll keep you on your toes, which is important. I also think you hide your feelings more than most, and as a result, none of us realized exactly how frightened you are. What can I do to help? To make you feel safer?”

She didn’t answer for a long time. Cole saw Francesca poke her head out of the kitchen, but when she saw them, she backed away, giving them privacy.

“I don’t know. That’s the problem,” Sarah said. “I’ve spent a few nights in a hotel up in Denver, and I felt fairly safe there, but I can’t spend the next who knows how long blowing my money on hotels. I live in a pretty nice neighborhood, but I don’t know most of my neighbors, besides Mrs. Grady, and she wouldn’t be much help with Owen. He outweighs us both by at least a hundred pounds. Even though I’ve lived there all my life, the people I used to know have moved away. And since I work such weird hours, I haven’t been able to get to know the new people who’ve bought houses around me.”

“Have you thought about moving? You work here in Castle Rock. What if you sold your house and got an apartment here until you found something you liked?” Cole asked.

She was quiet a moment. Then, in a small voice, she said, “You don’t think they’d be upset if I sold their house?”

Cole hated how unsure the woman in his arms sounded. “Absolutely not,” he said with conviction. “I know you probably have a lot of great memories of your dads in that house, but you’ll never lose those. You’ll carry them in your heart and head forever. I didn’t know your dads, but I’d venture a guess that Jackson would probably be mad if you were only holding on to it because of them.”

A minute went by, then she said, “I have thought about it. I love my house, but it would be easier if I didn’t have to drive back and forth to Castle Rock every day. And . . . sometimes being there is hard. Makes me miss them more. And when I wake up and Owen has left me something else, it scares me to death.”

“There’s an apartment complex here in Castle Rock that has a monitored entrance, and no one can get past the doorman unless they’re a resident or they’re specifically buzzed up by security,” Cole told her.

“I saw that online. But there’s a waiting list a mile long.”

“We can talk to Logan and see if he has any pull.”

Sarah’s head came up at that, and the hope he saw in her gaze would’ve brought Cole to his knees if he were standing.

“Really?”

“Really.”

Her face fell. “But I’d feel bad if I stole an apartment from someone else.”

Cole’s thumb moved back and forth on her soft skin at the base of her neck, trying to soothe her. “Would it make you feel safer?”