Children of Virtue and Vengeance (Legacy of Orïsha #2)(105)

The monster is out in the open.

“Back in the mountains, you told me about your mother,” I say. “You said she used to sing. You hummed her song to me.”

Ro?n lowers his head, but he extends his hand. I lace my fingers with his.

“Why then?” I ask.

“It was worth remembering.” He shrugs. “She was worth remembering.”

He looks up at me and I see the heart he pretends not to have. I can’t hold myself back. Every objection quiets when I bring my lips to his.

His embrace sends a shiver through my skin as I dig my hands into his hair. His metal fingers are cold to the touch. He has a way of holding me that makes time stand still.

“Z?tsōl…” He pulls away, touching the tear on his face. I look down and wipe my eyes. I don’t even know when I started crying.

He rubs the spot behind my ear and I lean my forehead against his. One hand drops from his neck, stopping where his shoulder meets his metal limb.

“Does it hurt?” I ask.

“Only when I breathe.”

“Always with the jokes.” I shake my head.

“If you wanted the jokes to end, you should’ve let me drown.”

I smile at him again, kissing his pink lips. “Next time I’ll think twice before saving your life.”

“As long as you’re taking feedback, you should know I have my limits. If it’s ever a choice between life and a certain appendage, I am requesting now that you let me die.”

“My gods!” I push him back.

“What’s that saying you have in your lands?” Ro?n tilts his head. “‘Don’t chop it till you try it’?”

“Next time I’ll let you drown.”

He laughs as he pulls me in, resting his hand on the small of my back. The smile falls away as the end of this war looms between us.

“I heard about your plan to save the world,” he says. “When do you leave?”

“In a few hours.”

“Okay.” He nods. “I’ll be ready.”

“No.” I pull away. “You need to heal!”

Ro?n clenches his teeth, grabbing his shoulder as he rises to his feet.

“Ro?n—”

“I’m going.” His metal fingers twitch, still out of line with his intent. “Z?tsōl, you are my home. You don’t get to leave me behind.”





CHAPTER EIGHTY-THREE


AMARI


I WILL BE a better queen.

My last words to Father return. A vow for the person I once was. A mockery of everything I’ve become.

I don’t know if Father would be horrified by the actions I’ve taken, or if the depths of my descent would make him proud. I am no better than him.

If anything, we are one and the same.

Strike, Amari.

I pull at my hair, wishing I could pull his claws out of me as well. His whispers are like the bars Kamarū crafted from stone, a prison I can’t escape. For so long he was the scar on my back. The tyrant I had to vanquish.

How in the skies did I allow his ghost to become my guiding force?

I grit my teeth against the sting of bile that shoots up my throat. Though nothing sits in my stomach, it all comes up at once. I feel every ounce of pain. Every shriveled-up corpse. Despite everything I want, I’m just another monarch terrorizing this kingdom.

I’m the very monster I hunt.

“At least you finally look sorry.”

I snap my head up; Zélie stands on the other side of the stone bars. The mountain ledges cast half her face in shadow, but a light seems to shine from within.

“You’re alright…” I prop my hands up, but she’s so much more than that. It’s like a new fire burns in her heart. My skin almost prickles from the heat of its blaze.

“If you had known I was alive in the village, would you still have launched that attack?” she asks.

I shrink into myself. The truth carves out the last pieces of dignity I have.

“To win this war?” I close my eyes. “Yes.”

I put my hand to my mouth, not knowing if vomit or screams will come out. “There’s no excuse for what I did. I know you could never forgive me.” Facing her now is like a sledgehammer to the heart. It forces me to face the reality I’ve fought so hard to hide.

I am the child of King Saran. The daughter of Queen Nehanda.

I was raised to win at all costs, no matter who gets hurt in the process.

“We brought them back.” Zélie crosses her arms. “You don’t deserve to know, but every person you killed breathes again.”

“What?” I shake my head, unsure if I actually heard her. “They’re alive?”

“Each and every one.”

I stumble as the world falls out from under me again. Relief rips through the last parts of me that were still whole. I can’t believe my ears. I can’t stop the tears that fall.

“How?”

“We used the magic of the moonstone to connect. With our combined power, Khani healed their bodies. I brought them back to life again.” She looks at the golden tattoos on her skin, seeing something I can’t. “We’re going to use it to attack Lagos and bring down the crown.”

I rise, though my legs feel like water. “You’ll be slaughtered.”