Call It What You Want(31)

“So at first, I asked to talk to David. I almost couldn’t talk, so I sounded like a total mess. It was so quiet, for like the longest time. I pulled the phone away from my face because I actually thought she hung up. But then she demanded to know who I am, and I—I lost it. I started crying. And then—and then—she said, ‘Oh great. Another one.’ And hung up. Can you believe that? Another one.” She starts crying again, sobbing openly. “This stupid baby keeps making me cry. I hate crying.”

“You’re really good at it.”

She laughs through her tears, then looks up at me, her lashes shining. “Did you come out here to check on me?”

I wish I could claim compassion. I look away. “No. I came out here to leave.”

“Why?”

“Some of Maegan’s friends showed up. They don’t like me much.” I kick at the gravel of the parking lot.

“Is it Rachel and Drew? What’s their problem? They’re usually pretty nice.”

“I’ve only known them for thirty seconds, but nice isn’t the word I’d use.”

The front door of the restaurant bursts open, and Maegan comes out, huddled in her jacket. She spots us across the parking lot, and her steps slow for a moment.

“You’re still here,” she says to me. But then she must notice her sister’s tear-streaked face and rushes on with, “Sam! Are you okay?”

“I’m better. Rob made me laugh.”

I’m not even trying to be funny. I push off the bumper and straighten. “I’ll let you guys go eat.”

“Wait.” Maegan puts a hand on my sleeve. Her eyes shine in the darkness, and our breath forms a cloud between us. “Drew was being a jerk. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let him say that stuff.”

“It’s not a big deal.”

“There are like four hundred tacos. Will you come back?”

I glance at the door to the restaurant.

Drew’s voice is like an ice pick in my brain. Charity?

I can’t. I shouldn’t have done this at all. I don’t belong here.

I shake my head. “I need to go. I don’t like leaving my mom alone.”

Maegan’s expression evens out. I’m sure she’s thinking of what I said about my dad. I’m sure she’s considering what her friends said right to my face.

I don’t know where I stand with her. I don’t know why it matters, but it suddenly does. Too much. I let myself want something for five minutes, and now it’s like losing everything all over again.

“My life is a mess,” I say to her. “Let’s keep it to calculus, okay?”

She blinks. Her eyes are still shining. But then she takes a step back. “Okay. Whatever you want.”

Then she and her sister move out of the way, and I lock myself into the Jeep, leaving them standing there in the cold.





CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Maegan

Last night with my parents was a nightmare. But this dinner with my friends and sister is coming close.

Especially since Samantha isn’t pulling any punches with Drew.

“What’s wrong?” she says when we all sit back down. “Another guy at the table made you feel inadequate?”

He snorts and picks up a taco. “If you’re talking about Rob Lachlan, the last thing he makes me feel is inadequate.”

Rachel’s eyes are on me. “Two days ago, you were pissed that he was your partner, and now you’re eating dinner together?”

“I invited him to dinner,” Samantha says. “Not Maegan.”

“Trust me,” Drew says to my sister. “You can do better.”

“Funny,” says Samantha. “I said the same thing to Rachel.”

“Sam!” I snap.

But Drew laughs. “It’s fine. I can take it. I don’t have to walk away from the table.”

That’s definitely a dig at Rob. I want to defend him—but I’m not sure how. “Why do you have such a problem with him?”

“Why do you feel so sorry for him? His dad stole millions of dollars, and the kid still lives in a mansion.” Drew snorts. “If my dad stole something, I guarantee you no one would be all like, ‘Poor little Drew.’ They’d be waiting for me to show up at the gas station in a ski mask.”

That shuts me up. I’m not sure what to say.

Drew grabs another taco. “See? You know I’m right. You cheated on the SAT and you didn’t even get suspended. You get to take it again! No questions asked! You think that would’ve happened to a black kid? Hell, my freshman year, some other kid lost his wallet in gym class, and they searched my locker first.”

I swallow.

“She didn’t get suspended because it was a first offense,” says Samantha.

“And she’s a straight-A student,” says Rachel. “She made a mistake.”

I fix my eyes on my plate. I do not like the turn of this conversation.

Especially because I know Drew’s right.

“A mistake.” Drew wipes at his mouth with a napkin. “That’s my point. You guys get to make mistakes. Rob Lachlan looks guilty as hell all the time. There’s no way he didn’t know what his dad was doing, but he’s walking around without an ankle bracelet.” He snorts. “Poor Rob. Give me a break.”