By Virtue I Fall (Sins of the Fathers #3)(20)

Mom gave me a knowing smile. “Try that line on your dad later, maybe it’ll work.”

I sank down before Mom and put my head in her lap like I’d done when I was small. “I know what my duties are. I’ll marry Clifford so the Outfit and our family get even stronger. I’ll play the politician’s wife. But until then I want to be me, at least for a little while. Clifford won’t care. He’s not like our men. I could live my dream for a few years before I’d become everything the Outfit needs me to be.”

Mom stroked my hair and sighed. “I want you to be yourself, not just for a few years but forever. Maybe you can be that around Clifford.”

“He can’t ever know all of our world’s secrets, Mom, so I’ll always have to keep part of myself hidden.”

“You’re very wise Anna. You always were.”

I closed my eyes, relishing the feeling of Mom’s fingers massaging my scalp.

“Paris is beautiful,” Mom whispered. Dad and she had celebrated their last anniversary there.

“I wish I could see it with my own eyes.”

Mom’s hands stilled. “Your protection will always be our top priority.”

“That’s why I never asked to apply to the New York Fashion Institute. But Paris is far from our world’s conflicts. I won’t tell people who I am. I’ll pretend I’m a normal student. I’ll blend in. That’s the best protection.”

“You have my blessing, sweetheart. We’ll figure out your protection.” She laughed. “But I don’t know how we’ll convince your father.”





Mom went in first. If anyone could convince Dad then it was her.

I paced in the hallway. I was tempted to eavesdrop, but resisted the urge. The voices behind the door were too quiet anyway. Neither Dad nor Mom often raised their voices.

After what felt like forever, the door opened and Mom motioned for me to get in. Her expression told me the fight wasn’t over yet.

Dad stood in front of the window, his arms behind his back. I gave him a hopeful smile.

He released a sigh. “You know how dangerous our world is.”

“But Paris isn’t anyone’s territory. It’s far away, yes, but that’s an advantage.”

Dad gave a tight smile. “That’s one way to see it. But our conflicts don’t end at any borders.”

“The Camorra won’t send anyone to France to kidnap me. And the Famiglia has never been in the business of kidnapping women.”

Dad’s face had tightened like it always did when the darkest hour of the Outfit was mentioned. I doubted he’d ever get over it.

“Don’t you think I’ll travel the world once I’m married to Clifford? His family has vacation homes in Europe.”

“The Clark’s bodyguards will guard you then.”

“I can take Santino to Paris. He’s protected me for years. He can keep me safe in Paris.”

Dad’s brows puckered. To my surprise, it was Mom who looked more worried because of my suggestion. I definitely needed to be careful around her. If she found out about me lusting after Santino, she’d not only forbid me from going to Paris but she’d also kill him herself.

“Three years is a long time, Anna.”

“I’ll come to Chicago for the holidays and everyone’s birthdays and important social events, and you could come visit me as well.”

“We’re talking about a ten-hour flight, not a short car ride,” Dad said.

I walked toward him, giving him my best puppy dog eyes. Dad was cold as ice but this look always got him, eventually.

“I don’t even have to finish, but I’d love to give it a try, for a little while at least. You know I never get in trouble Dad. You can trust me. I’ll be good. Just let me live a little.”

Dad touched my cheek. “I’ll protect you at any cost.”

“I know, but I’ll be safe.”

“Even if I let you attend the program for a while, you can’t begin this fall. We agreed to have your engagement party right after your birthday. The program will already have started then.”

I bit my lip. My engagement party… I kept forgetting about it. Only three months. “I could come over from Paris for it.”

Dad shook his head. “Many social gatherings will require your presence around the time of your engagement. You can start in the Spring.”

“Okay,” I said quietly, trying not to be too disappointed. Dad even considering Paris at all was already a major win. “But I was accepted for the Fall semester. I don’t know if they let me start later.”

“I’ll handle it. We have a few contacts in France. I’m sure there’s something we can do. Three months is too little time to find you a safe apartment in Paris anyway. It requires plenty of planning so spring is more feasible.”

“So I can go, after your birthday?” I asked, trying to put Dad on the spot. He raised a blond brow, seeing right through me.

“I’ll talk to Santino. If he thinks he can keep you safe in Paris, I might consider letting you go in February until next summer. After that, I’ll have to decide again.”

I stood on my tiptoes and threw my arms around Dad’s neck then kissed his cheek, which was as usually impeccably shaved. I’d never seen Dad with stubble. “Thank you so much, Dad!”