Blurred (Connections, #3.5)(18)

Fuck me—I didn’t give in and she’s still giving me a job. I instantly feel better. My life is turning around. I can feel it. I head down to Four & Twenty Blackbirds to grab a drink, a sandwich, and a slice of pie with a feeling of hopefulness I haven’t felt in a while. The chick who’s usually behind the counter isn’t there, but then again it’s later than I usually come in. She’s probably already off work. I order my stuff and sit at my regular booth near the window.

“You do that a lot,” a raspy voice says.

At the sound, I look up to see counter girl with her apron off but grasped tightly in her hands.

“What do I do a lot?” I ask her.

“Stare out the window and just look at the people walking by.” She takes a seat across from me.

“They’re interesting to watch.” I point out the window at an older man walking his dog. “See him?”

She nods.

“He’s trying to get his dog to listen to him. He thinks he’s training the dog, but really the dog is training him.”

She laughs. “Yeah, I can see that.” Then she points to a woman with a young boy. “What about her?”

I offer her a big grin. “Oh, that’s easy. Her son wants a toy and she has somewhere to be so she’s telling herself she’s compromising but really she’s bribing.”

She nods again. “Fascinating.”

We go through a couple more rounds and she gets the idea and begins trying it on her own.

That gives me a chance to take a good look at her. She’s cute with dark brown hair and freckles. I’d guess her age at no older than twenty-four. She has an innocence about her that reminds me of Dahl when she was younger.

“I’m Ben.” I reach my hand out.

“Ruby,” she smiles.

“Nice to meet you, Ruby.”

She blushes and I laugh. I haven’t met someone like her in a long time. We talk for about an hour before she looks at her watch. “It’s getting late. I should probably be going.”

I stand up and shove my hands in my pockets. I don’t try to dissuade her or ask her out. “Yeah, me too. I’ll see you around.” I extend my hand again.

Her grip is weak. She’s timid. And she’s blushing again. After spending the past sixty minutes talking to her, I realize she’s not as similar to Dahlia as I first thought. But that’s okay. She was refreshing to talk to. Even though she seems like a nice girl, any kind of romantic entanglement is the farthest thing from my mind right now. I’m not looking for a love interest—girlfriend or otherwise.

“Yeah, see you around.” She smiles.

I’m thinking about heading over to Beck’s as I leave the coffee shop but decide I’ve had enough to drink for a while, and need to be clear headed for my new job on Monday.

***

I could always schmooze a congressman’s wife, a publicist’s sister, even a former teacher’s husband, with a few carefully crafted words. Well-rehearsed flirtation is what Dahl used to call it when she heard me in action. When there was a story, I knew how to set about getting it. It was my calling. I can only hope it still is.

After a week of training for this f*cktastic job, I’m finally on my own. Taking in a deep breath, I tell myself I can do this. I can get the story, regardless of what type of story it is. Today should be like going after any other piece—but I know it really won’t be.

I button the last two buttons of my shirt and comb my fingers through my wet hair without glancing in the mirror. I shaved for work today, something I rarely do. The worn leather of my messenger bag in my hand makes me smile. It was the one thing I searched for in the boxes of my stuff that my mom had stored in her attic when I first returned from New York City. I grab it and sling it over my shoulder before walking out the door of the fleabag hotel that has become my home. I decided to stay here until I figure out what’s permanent in my life. But I know I’m stuck here at least until after the trial. Once it ends, I’ll be able to decide if I’m staying in California or heading back to New York City. Who knows, I may even go back to Australia.

I saw Trent last Sunday. I took a bus out to Laguna and we met at the beach. We surfed all morning and then I took him out to lunch. He looks good. He seems to be doing really well. He asked me to help him—he wants to start competing. We discussed the commitment needed to compete and he seems to have it. I know he’s been up before dawn for months and out there conquering wave after wave. He wants me to talk to Serena—to convince her to take him to Hawaii to get the feel of it. He’s planning to go to college in Hawaii and wants to compete in the Pipe Masters. I told him I would try. I also promised that Sundays at the beach would be our thing from now on, but I’d need a few weeks to get a car first. He wanted to give me mine back, but no way was I taking it from him. I know how much he loves it.

Making that phone call to Serena was tough but last night I finally did it. She answered on the first ring. We’d been communicating through Trent since I left for Australia, but hadn’t actually talked in over six months. She asked how I was and I told her the truth—that I was a far cry from getting my shit together but I was much better than the last time she’d seen me. I didn’t bring up Jason. I didn’t have to. Trent told me his father was coming around more and that his mother seemed happier—so I decided to just accept it. In the end, the conversation went extremely well. Turns out, she thinks surfing is helping to keep Trent on course and has already arranged for the two of them to go to Hawaii at the end of the month. I was glad to see her on board, but honestly didn’t expect anything different. After all, she is just like our mother.