Blossom in Winter (Blossom in Winter #1)(63)

“I haven’t seen you in ages.” She sounds irritably sweet.

“Well, six weeks isn’t really ages,” I snap, my tone serious. “How’s Columbia? Are you enjoying it?”

“Not bad, actually. Much better than I thought. We have exams before Christmas, but Dad told me I could take a week off in December for a birthday trip if I stay focused until then.” I can’t help but smile seeing her face glowing, but I’ve got to talk to her. “Why are you so distant lately? You didn’t say a word…We’re going to Rio next week, maybe we could—”

“Petra,” I interrupt, my voice heavy. I pause for a moment to find the best words. “I want to apologize for what I did in Rome. I feel terrible. I can’t sleep thinking about what I have done. The entire atmosphere and the excess of wine made me lose my mind.” I take a deep breath. “Do you think you can forget what happened?”

She lifts her eyebrows, and her lips spread apart as she looks intently at me. “Would you like me to?”

I don’t want to give her my answer. I know it’ll only hurt her—me… us? “I think it’s better for both of us that you do.”

“What about you, then?”

“I’m meeting a friend in Rio.” I feel my heart punishing me. “Her name is Rafaela. She’s one of the bridesmaids… I just wanted you to be aware of that. I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.”

I see her eyes watering. She tilts her head back to stop her tears and heaves a loud sigh filled with sorrow. “I see…” She sniffles. “Well, Brazilian girls are a perfect distraction indeed…”

I hate to feel her disappointment and pain. I bring my chair closer to hers, but I keep my hands to myself. She notices it. My gaze is also different—colder, more distant and rigid.

“Petra, let’s be rational,” I begin. “I’m way too old for you, and your dad will never approve of any relationship between us. We should remain friends just like before. You deserve to meet an amazing young man at Columbia. Someone who’s your—”

“You didn’t even try to talk to him,” she protests.

I remain speechless.

Her eyes drop to my hands resting on the table. She lets out a breath before looking back at me. “So, you don’t have any feelings for me?”

Oh God. “You are like family, Petra. I love you as such, as a goddaughter and friend. That’s it. I apologize for that night,” I repeat.

“Wow...” she sniffles, closing her eyes for an instant. “Well, we are not together anyway, so don’t feel held back because of me.”

Despite the harshness of the moment, I smile. She gave me the answer I needed to hear. “Can we remain friends?” I ask, but she doesn’t say a word. She keeps looking at my hands. Before that kiss in Rome, I’d have already interlaced my fingers with hers while caressing and kissing her knuckles. But touching her will only make things worse. “I care so much about you, Petra. I want to remain in your life.” You have no idea how much.

She nods painfully before our eyes interlock again. “I do care about you too,” she mumbles.

Her eyes are red and wet. I feel the urge to hold her tight, to kiss her, to tell her everything is going to be alright, but no. I don’t do any of it. It’s better just to leave. The longer I stay, the worse it will be.

“Very well. Thank you for your understanding.” I glance at my watch. “I have to go. Have a great day,” and I smile cordially.

Then I stand up, fasten the top button of my blazer, and go to the waiter to settle the bill. Afterward, I simply leave.





Petra Van Gatt





I’m totally paralyzed, frozen by his words and attitude. He didn’t kiss me, not even a hug or a simple friendly touch on the arm. Nothing. My hopes and dreams have been totally smashed down by the cruel reality: we are not meant to be together. I should’ve known better. And yet, despite it all, there is nothing I’m more certain of than him.

I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and tilt my head back to prevent my tears from falling here in the coffee shop. But my heart is already crying, bleeding, devastated. Friendship is not enough, Alex. No. It’s not. That kiss meant something. And not only for me. I know it meant something to him too. I felt it. Still, here I am having to compromise my heart for the sake of having him in my life. Oh, Petra, what have you done…





Chapter 15





Rio de Janeiro, October 17, 2019

Petra Van Gatt





Dad is floating on a cloud. I mean, not because we are on a plane flying among clouds, but because it’s our first trip in a long time together. I’m not pleased to share the aircraft with Alexander, but I try to be on my best behavior for Dad. I know he’s happy for me to be here and to discover Rio with him. I decide to be particularly chatty with Dad, making him laugh with my stories about Columbia. I even take a selfie with him and send it to his WhatsApp with a nice filter and text. Obviously, I’m not doing any of that with Alexander. Actually, I even hope he’s feeling totally left out, and, at least judging by the look on his face, it seems like he is.

The pilot announces our approach to the Gale?o International Airport. I excitedly look out the window at the beach, the coastline, the greenery, the cliffs, and the many white buildings and houses covering the landscape.