Blossom in Winter (Blossom in Winter #1)(121)

Holy… I feel myself waking up just now at his warm words and beautiful smile. “Hey.”

“Did you sleep well?”

I nod and sit beside him. My heart starts racing as I look into his tender blue eyes. Oh God, I’ve missed them so much. And his scent, his lips, his wild hair…

He smiles at me, caressing my cheek, and places a lingering kiss on my lips—one that enflames my heart faster than a lighter.

But I want more than that.

I lean forward to reach his mouth again, straddling him, and hold his jawline while I hungrily devour him. “I love you,” I whisper.

His eyes locked on mine, he beams at me and strokes my long hair. “I love you so much, Petra.”

Then he presses his lips against mine once more, but this time with such urgency and fervor that I feel how intensely he’s missed me. “I love you so much,” he repeats, his voice barely audible, holding me tight in his arms. He starts lifting my sweater up. I help him strip it off. I’m not wearing a bra underneath. He returns to my mouth, but as he glances at my tits, his lips twist into a naughty smile. I know they somehow look bigger, swollen—my areolas too. He fondles my left nipple very slowly with his thumb before sucking it into his mouth.

I whimper at the touch. “I’m sorry, I’m slightly more sensitive lately.”

He looks hungry. “They are bigger…” And by the sound of his voice, maybe even starving. “If I touch them with my fingers like this, does it hurt?”

“A bit,” I mumble. He bites his bottom lip while staring intently at them. From my chest, he traces a line with his fingers. When he lowers his gaze to my belly, I decide to get off his lap.

I reach for my top, put it back on, and change the subject. “Why didn’t you sleep with me last night?”

“I did sleep with you. Julia told me you were exhausted and needed rest, so I just got up early.”

“Where is she, by the way?”

“She went back to the Netherlands.”

“She just came here for one night?”

“Indeed, she has work on Monday.” He grabs my hand and pulls me over to sit on his lap. “I’m very proud of you, Petra. I know it’s not easy for you to go through these interviews, be on these panels, and meet all these journalists. Julia doesn’t know how hard it is for you to do all this, but she is right. You can’t stop eating. I called the doctor this morning. He told me eating disorders are quite common among agora-and social phobias, but you can’t let yourself down.”

“I know,” I sigh. “Dad reminds me of that all the time.”

“Promise me you will eat? Maria made a soup—it has nothing in it but vegetables.”

I roll my eyes. “Okay, fine. I’ll eat.”

“Thank you.” He tenderly kisses my forehead. “And kindly go for a checkup when you can. You haven’t seen a doctor since October.”

“Pfff. You’re worse than Dad. Fine, I will go this week.”





Hudson Valley, March 5, 2020





Emma texted. She’s finally landed in New York. I’ve been dying to see her! As usual, we meet at her parents’ residence in Hudson Valley. She’ll be in New York for just a week before leaving for a long trip across Southeast Asia with some of her new friends.

“You look so different! Look at you, you’re glowing! You look more… hmm…. womanly,” she praises, while dragging me to her bedroom. I know she’s impatient to know all the secrets and gossip she’s been missing. I sit on the sofa while Emma locks the door so we’re not disturbed.

“Well, it has been a couple of months since you left for Bali. I’m so glad you’re back.”

“Me too, babygirl.” She hugs me tight. “So, how is Van Dieren?” she asks excitedly, clapping her hands, anxious for all the juicy details.

“Um, I thought you’d ask about me first. But, if you want to know, I think he’s fine.”

“So naive, my God! I don’t care how he’s actually doing—I care about how he’s doing with you.” I remain confused. “Oh, babygirl… How is he, sexually speaking? Are you enjoying it? I want to know everything!”

“Oh…” I blush, looking down. “I can’t talk about it.”

“Why not? I’m your best friend. Did you sign an NDA or what?”

“Actually… I did.”

“Wow. He takes his reputation very seriously.”

“Or maybe mine…”

“Indeed. Well, if you are happy, I’m happy. What else did I miss?”

My face gets unusually serious. “Emma, you know you are like a big sister to me.” Emma smiles with pride. “I need your advice.” I let out a sigh, and, armed with courage, I face reality through Emma’s eyes. “I screwed up.”

Her jaw drops in confusion. “You screwed up? That’s hard to believe...What happened?”

I take a deep breath before saying these words to someone for the very first time in my life: “I’m fifteen weeks pregnant.”

“Holy shit!” She looks me straight in the eyes without even blinking. “Indeed, not sure if I should congratulate you on this one.”

“I messed up, I know. I lied to him and told him I was taking the pill.” Emma crosses her arms; her face remains astonished. But I proceed, “Alex promised my father we’d only have kids after I graduate, and in exchange we could get engaged. So since I found out, I’ve been hiding the pregnancy…” I take a long breath. “But I won’t be able to hide it much longer. My bump is growing, and it’s starting to show when I’m naked… He invited me over for the weekend—I’m so scared he’ll find out... Oh God...”