Bloodlines (Bloodlines #1)(114)

"Yellow, huh?" I asked, staring at the living room walls.

"It's called 'Goldenrod,'" he corrected. "And it's supposed to be cheerful and calming."

I started to point out that those two traits didn't seem like they'd go together but then decided against it. The color, slightly obnoxious though it was, completely transformed the living room. Between that and the blinds that had replaced Keith's heavy drapes, the room was now filled with color and light that went a long way to obscure the memory of the battle. I shuddered, recalling it. Even if the apartment hadn't been needed to buy Adrian's help, I wasn't sure I could've accepted it and stayed here. The memory of Lee's death - and the two Strigoi women's - was too strong.

"How did you afford new furniture?" I asked. The Alchemists had given him the place, but there was no other stipend involved.

"I sold the old stuff," Adrian said, seeming very pleased by this. "That recliner..." He faltered, a troubled look briefly crossing his features. I wondered if he too could imagine Lee's life bleeding away in that chair. "That recliner was worth a lot. It was appallingly overpriced, even by my standards. But I got enough for it to replace the rest. It's used, but what choice did I have?"

"It's nice," I said, running my hand along an overstuffed plaid sofa. It looked ghastly with the walls but appeared to be in good shape. Plus, much like the brightness of the yellow, the clashing furniture helped diminish the memories of what had happened. "You must have done some savvy shopping. I'm guessing you don't buy a lot of used stuff."

"Try never," he said. "You have no idea the things I've had to lower myself to." His pleased smile dimmed as he regarded me carefully. "How are you holding up?"

I shrugged. "Fine. Why wouldn't I be? What happened to me isn't nearly as bad as what Jill went through."

He crossed his arms. "I don't know. Jill didn't watch a guy die in front of her. And let's not forget that same guy wanted to kill you only moments before in order to rise again from the dead."

Those were things that had definitely been on my mind a lot in the last week, things that were going to take a while to get over. Sometimes, I didn't feel anything at all. Other times, the reality of what had happened descended on me so swiftly and heavily that I couldn't breathe. Strigoi nightmares had replaced the ones of re-education centers.

"I'm actually better with it than you might think," I said slowly, gazing off at nothing particular. "Like, it's terrible about Lee and what he did, but I feel I can get over it in time. Do you know what I keep thinking about the most, though?"

"What?" asked Adrian gently.

The words seemed to come forth without my control. I hadn't expected to say them to anyone, certainly not to him.

"Lee telling me I was wasting my life and staying aloof from people. And then, during that last meeting with Keith, he told me that I was naive, that I didn't understand the world. And it's true to a certain extent. I mean, not what he said about you guys being evil... but well, I was naive. I should've been more careful with Jill. I believed the best of Lee when I should've been more wary. I'm not a fighter like Eddie, but I am an observer of the world... or so I like to think. But I failed. I'm no good with people."

"Sage, your first mistake in all of this is listening to anything Keith Darnell says. The guy's an idiot, an ass**le, and a dozen other words that aren't suitable for a lady like yourself."

"See?" I said. "You just admitted it, that I'm some kind of untouchable, pure soul."

"I never said any such thing," he countered. "My point is that you're leagues above Keith, and what happened with Lee was dumb, ridiculous bad luck. And remember, none of us saw it coming either. You weren't alone. It casts no reflection on you. Or..." His eyebrows rose. "Maybe it does. Didn't you say that Lee considered killing Keith for Alchemist blood?"

"Yeah... but Keith left too soon."

"Well, there you go. Even a psychopath recognized your worth enough to want to kill someone else first."

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "That doesn't make me feel better."

Adrian shrugged. "My earlier point remains. You're a solid person, Sage. You're easy on the eyes, if a little skinny, and your ability to memorize useless information is going to totally hook in some guy. Put Keith and Lee out of your head because they have nothing to do with your future."

"Skinny?" I asked, hoping I wasn't blushing. I also hoped if I sounded outraged enough, he wouldn't notice how much the other comment had disarmed me. Easy on the eyes. Not exactly the same as being told I was hotness incarnate or drop-dead gorgeous. But after a lifetime of having my appearance judged as "acceptable," it was a heady compliment - especially coming from him.

"I just tell it like it is."

I almost laughed. "Yes. Yes, you do. Now tell me about a different subject, please. I'm tired of this one."

"Sure thing." Adrian infuriated me sometimes, but I had to admit, I loved his short attention span. It made dodging uncomfortable topics so much easier. Or so I thought. "Do you smell that?"

An image of the bodies flashed into my head, and for a moment, all I could think he meant was the smell of decay. Then I sniffed more deeply. "I smell the paint, and... wait... is that pine?"