Bittersweet Memories (Off-Limits #4)(120)

She nods, her body heaving with the force of her sobs. “I’m sorry I made you worry so much throughout the years, Si. When we had that argument about me moving into college dorms, I was so upset that I wasn’t thinking straight. I got into a car accident, and when I woke up, I couldn’t remember anything. I never would’ve stayed away from you otherwise. Never.”

“It’s okay,” I promise her. “It’s okay, Ray. All that matters is that you found your way back to me.”

She nods, and I rub her back gently. If she remembers me, she must also remember her father. She’s cried so many bitter tears over him, and I’m worried that the pain feels fresh for her all over.

“Are you okay, my love? If you remember everything…”

She pulls away to look at me and nods. “I will be. I got through the pain once, thanks to you. I’ll do it again.”

I cup her face and wipe her tears away, my forehead dropping to hers. Alanna’s arms wrap around my neck, her lips pressing against mine with a years-old urgency.

This kiss hits differently. It’s filled with a thousand promises and a thousand apologies. “I love you so much, Silas,” she whispers against my lips. I groan and thread my hand through her hair, fisting it in my hand to bring her closer. Alanna comes willingly, and I deepen the kiss, needing all of her. This. So long as I’ve got this, I don’t need anything else.

The sounds of ripping paper pulls us apart, and we turn toward my desk to find Ryan ripping up the contract I just signed. He throws the shreds onto my desk and turns toward us with remorse brimming in his eyes.

I pull away from Alanna and take a step toward him, but before I can say a word, he walks out of my office, the door closing behind him.

I glance back at Alanna and gently brush her hair out of her face. The way she’s looking at me breaks my heart.

“I’m so sorry, Silas,” she whispers, her voice breaking.

“Don’t be,” I tell her. “All that matters is that you’re here with me now. The past doesn’t matter as much as the future does.”

She nods, and I take a step closer to her, grinning from ear to ear. I thought I’d lost her forever, yet the woman staring back at me with love shining through her eyes is undoubtedly my Ray.





Chapter Seventy-Nine





Silas



“Si,” Alanna says as we walk into the house, the two of us pausing in front of the mirror in the hallway. “I never truly forgot you.” Her voice is soft and apologetic, as though she wants to reassure me but doesn’t know how to.

I turn toward her and wrap my hands around her shoulders. “I know, Ray,” I whisper. I can’t lie to her and say that her treating me like a stranger hasn’t hurt me, but it was bearable because even though she didn’t realize it, our love shone through. “I saw it in the thousand cranes you folded for me, the tattoo on your rib and the handkerchief you carry with you. It was in the way you kissed me, the way you couldn’t resist me, even though you fought this thing between us so hard. Even when I couldn’t call you mine, I knew your heart still belonged to me.”

She nods and takes a step closer to me, her arms wrapping around my neck. “You never stopped searching for me, did you?”

I shake my head. “How could I? I knew you were out there somewhere, and I refused to believe you simply left me. We may have had an argument, but it wasn’t the kind that would have you walking away from everything we had.”

“Silas,” she says, her voice pained. “What if I’d died? What if you’d never found me? Were you just going to waste away your entire life because of me? That’s not what I wanted for you.”

I lean in and press a lingering kiss to her forehead. “If you’d died, I’d avenge you and spend the rest of my life mourning you. I once promised you that you’d be my last love, and I meant it. If one day I found out that you’d been buried, I’d bury my heart right alongside you and count down the days until I see you again.”

“You’re crazy,” she says, tears filling her eyes.

“I know.” I drop my head to hers and inhale shakily. “Maybe I really am crazy, Alanna, because I knew you were still out there. I could feel it in my soul. I knew you were waiting for me to find you, so I never stopped searching. I’m sorry it took me so long, baby.”

Alanna sniffs, and I wrap my arms around her fully, hugging her tightly as she bursts into tears. “I’m sorry it took me so long to come back to you. I’m sorry I hurt you so much, Si. I’m so sorry.”

I wrap my hand over the back of her head, her face nestled against my neck. “All that matters is that you found your way back home, baby.”

She rises to her tiptoes, her lips finding mine. The way she kisses me is different. It’s tinged with regret, and I lift her into my arms. Alanna wraps her legs around my hips as I carry her to our bedroom, her lips never leaving mine. “Do you have any idea how scared I was?” I whisper against her lips. “When you went missing, Ricardo and other residents went searching for you, but you were nowhere to be found. I nearly went crazy trying to find you.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I’m here now, Si. I’m here, and I’m never leaving you again. You’ll never be alone again, I promise.”