Beneath This Man (This Man, #2)(169)

‘No.’ I realise how stupid I was now.

‘The list of his offenses goes on and on. He’s broken a lot of rules. He’s got to go.’

‘I don’t remember him. He wasn’t at the anniversary party.’ I would have remembered that cocky face.

‘No, he was on duty.’

‘Duty?’

Jesse smiles. It’s a welcome sight. ‘He’s a cop.’

I cough, and then wince. ‘What?’

‘He’s a copper.’ His eyebrows rise in a yes-you-heard-me-right gesture.

Steve’s a policeman? ‘You threatened to kill a cop?’

‘I was crazy mad.’ He pushes my hair from my face and gazes at me thoughtfully. ‘I’ve been thinking.’

I don’t like the sound of that. He doesn’t look like he does either. ‘What about?’

‘Well, about a lot of things. But the first thing is that I need to talk to Patrick about Van Der Haus.’

I knew I wasn’t going to like what he said, but I can’t see any way around this. Mikael is probably the equivalent of Patrick’s retirement fund, and I know he’s going to probably pass out with shock when I tell him that I can’t work with Mikael anymore. I really can’t, and I’ve not even told Jesse about the text message. But he has just confirmed that he thinks it was Mikael in that footage too.

Oh God. ‘It’s Monday!’ I blurt, shifting a little in an attempt to get myself up.

His hands swiftly press into my shoulders, pushing me back down. ‘Do you honestly think I’m letting you go anywhere?’ He shakes his head. ‘Listen, that’s not the only thing I’ve been thinking about.’ He commences chomp on his lip.

Oh no. What is he thinking about? ‘What?’ I ask quietly. He’s not even elaborated on his thoughts of Mikael, although I know exactly where he’s going with it.

He pushes himself in closer to me. ‘I can’t ever be without you.’

‘I know that.’

‘But it’s not because I’m worried about reverting back to my old ways. I love you because you give me purpose. You’ve filled a massive hole with your beautiful face and your spirit, and while I might be making your life a little more difficult with my challenging ways…’ He raises a sarcastic eyebrow. ‘I want to throw that right back at you.’

I laugh hard and wince immediately afterwards, but Jesse doesn’t join me in my hysterics. His lips purse and his grip increases on my hip. ‘I am not challenging, Jesse Ward.’ His eyebrows jump higher. He obviously disagrees, but I slap my hand over his mouth to halt his counter attack. ‘You just said that I’ve filled a massive hole with my spirit…’

‘And your beautiful face.’ he mumbles into my hand.

I roll my eyes. ‘Part of that spirit is my incessant need to challenge your challenging ways. You’ll never get rid of that tiny part of me that rebels against you and you wouldn’t want to. That’s what makes me different from all the women of The Manor, who’ve licked your boots for far too long,’ It’s me who raises a sarcastic eyebrow now, and his eyes narrow slightly in return. I’m delivering these words to a man who is so incredibly thick skinned and unreasonable, I wouldn’t be surprised if he laughed in my face, but I continue anyway. ‘I’ve given myself to you completely. Every part of me is yours. No one will ever take me away from you. Not ever. And I know part of your issue is keeping me as far away from what the other women in your life represent.’

‘There have been no other women in my life!’ he argues through my hand.

I push it harder to his lips. ‘But I need to know something.’

His eyebrows rise. He can’t answer because my hand is too tight on his lips.

‘You want to keep me as far away from the women of The Manor, but what about the sex?’ I can feel him grinning against my palm. He finds this a funny question? I take my hand away from his mouth. Yes, he’s grinning that roguish grin. It’s a lovely sight, even if I’m not happy about his amusement at my question. He goes out of his way to dress me suitably, according to him, makes me wear lace – that request is suddenly very obvious – and he doesn’t want me to drink.

Oh God!

The reason for that has just landed with an enormous smack in my brain. ‘You don’t like me drinking because you think I’m going to do what you used to do when you were drunk. You think I’m going to want to f*ck everything in sight!’ I practically screech the words at him and his grin soon disappears. I’ve not even given him a chance to answer my previous question and I’m lobbing him another. Well not a question; more of a conclusion.

‘Will you stop f*cking swearing?’ He rolls onto his back, without so much as a hiss or spit of pain.

Oh no. I scramble up, ignoring my own pain, and straddle him. ‘It is, isn’t it? That’s the reason.’

I watch as he absorbs my words. He can’t possibly argue with it, I know I’ve got him here. He takes a deep breath and opens his mouth to talk, but nothing comes out. He takes another but still, nothing comes out. He does this three times before he eventually speaks. ‘It’s not just that, Ava. You’re vulnerable when you’re drunk.’

‘But it is part of the reason, isn’t it?’ I know the other part is men assuming I’m fair game. He already admitted that.