Before I Let Go (Skyland #1)(42)

He turned from me then and walked away before I could mutter a single word.





CHAPTER 15





“Remind me why you insist on my attendance.” I stared at Thalia in the mirror where she was still fussing with my hair.

“Because.” She grinned as she wrapped a piece of hair around her finger. “Tonight is the Twin Blood Moon Festival. It is the one night of the year when the twin moons will be at their fullest. It is a day of luck and honor, and it symbolizes the prosperity for the year to come.” She grabbed a small pot of rouge from her bag that lay on my desk before bringing it to my face. “Evren celebrates with the kingdom every year.”

“And what does that have to do with me? Let Evren go out and frolic, and do what he must, but I want to stay here and read.” I tapped my finger against the book she had given me, the one about our Starblessed history. Most of what I had read so far was nothing more than things I had already known, but I wasn't even a fourth of the way through. I had just started a section that spoke of Starblessed amplifying their magic with nature.

I was far more interested in it than standing before Evren and falling for his every word.

Because that was what I had been doing. I hadn’t seen him since yesterday in the courtyard, and his damned words replayed over and over in my head.

“You have plenty of time to read later. I suppose you could stay in and attend the queen’s annual dinner.” I scrunched my nose, and she laughed as she pressed some rouge against my cheeks before picking up a pot of red cream and dipping her finger inside. She slid it across my lips, and I held perfectly still as she did so. “I’m certain you’ll enjoy tonight’s festivities.”

She moved out of the way, and I stared at myself in the mirror. She had lined my eyes with coal and my lips were a sharp contrast that matched the color of blood. The same color as the dress she had brought that hung near my bed.

“You'll stay with me the whole time?” I stood and moved toward the dress. I lifted the light skirt in my hands and looked upon it. It was much finer than anything I had ever worn back home, finer than anything I had ever worn until I arrived at Gavril’s side.

A chill ran over my skin, and I tried not to allow myself to think of him. My gaze fell to my wrist, but I quickly pulled it away to look at my friend.

She was dressed similarly, with her dark, curly hair framing her face beautifully, and her dress fell behind her in the lightest shade of blue.

It was odd to watch how graceful she seemed in the gown because I had never seen her in anything other than trousers and a shirt.

“Yes.” She chuckled at my question. “I promise I won't leave you alone so you aren't tempted to sneak off into the dark with your mate.”

I swatted her arm, but she chuckled harder.

“That is not going to happen.” I slipped my shirt over my head as she pulled my dress from where it hung and held it out to me. I stepped inside, the silky fabric gliding against my skin, and I turned away from her as she began to lace up the bodice.

“You're right. It'll probably be the other way around. Evren's going to want to tear this dress off you as soon as he sees you.”

I scoffed at her before moving to the mirror and fussing with the small earrings she had given me. I stared at my reflection, and I hardly recognized the girl looking back at me.

The red dress dipped low between my breasts and the sheer sleeves covered my arms all the way down to my wrists. The slit in the gown came up to my hip and left my left leg on full display.

But it was the back that had me doing a double take. It was so unlike anything I had ever worn in the fae kingdom because the star marks on my back were completely covered by the fabric.

This wasn’t a dress to display me as a Starblessed. If anything, it displayed me as Evren’s mate.

It was odd. I looked so unlike myself, but at the same time, I felt more me than I ever had before. Stronger. More sure. I had no idea how I could feel that way when I felt so confused at the same time. It was as if I was discovering who I was, but still so unsure about who I wanted to be.

But even that was a lie.

I wanted to be Evren’s mate. I wanted to tell him yes when he joked about taking his hand, but there was another part of me that was still so fearful. Even though I had felt more at home in the Blood kingdom than I had ever felt anywhere else, I was scared to let that feeling be real.

I looked in the mirror, and I watched Thalia as she fussed with the strap of her shoe around her ankle. For the first time in my life, I felt like I had found home in a friend, and that almost made me more fearful than Evren did.

Thalia had become my best friend, and I feared the heart break of losing her.

“Okay. Come on.” Thalia headed in my direction and grabbed my hand in hers. She pulled me toward the door as a smile lit up her face. “We’re going to miss all the fun.”

I smiled and tried to push down my intrusive thoughts because her joy was contagious.

She pulled me along with her, not stopping until we pushed outside the castle doors. I took a deep breath as I stared up into the sky and saw the twin moons shining at their fullest. Back home this day had been a bad omen. It was a day when stories were told of the vampyres and what they were capable of. It was a day when we were warned of the dangers that lurked just outside the edge of our town.

But I felt none of that fear here.