Before I Let Go (Skyland #1)(36)

“I promised you I would never be like him.” His gaze was soft and pleading, and I knew what he meant. He didn't want to be like his brother, taking from me against my will, but he didn't understand. “You don't have to do this.”

“He can take from me.” Thalia looked at me softly, and I knew she only said it because she knew how badly I warred with myself. But there wasn’t an ounce of indecision left in me. This was my mate, and it would be me who saved him. “It’s all right, Adara.”

I shook my head as I stared down at him. “I am your mate, Evren, and you will feed from me.”

His gaze sparked in surprise before his lips parted and his hand tightened against my neck. My stomach clinched tight, and my breath caught in my throat, but I didn't have time to steady myself before Evren lifted my wrist to his mouth. He sank his teeth into my skin. I closed my eyes, and I forgot about everyone else around us. This was Evren and me, and even though he was hurt, he was here, and he was safe. The queen couldn't touch him here. Neither could Gavril, and I reminded myself of that fact over and over again.

His magic surged through me as he drank, and my body was lit afire as every inch of me became alive within his touch. I was still so angry with him, but I couldn't deny my want. I couldn’t recognize that pain that blared through me with his feeding when I was so lost in my desire and relief. But I forced myself to cling on to my anger because without it I knew I would be hurt. Seeing him like this now gripped my chest in a vise, and I couldn’t imagine how much worse it could be if I let myself fall into him completely.

He drank long and hard, and I could feel myself draining. But as every drop drained from me and into him, my body ached deeper and deeper, and I couldn't remember why I wasn't supposed to want him.

“That's enough, Evren.” I couldn't make out who said it, but they were probably right. But I didn't want him to stop. I never wanted him to stop. I wanted to live in this moment, in this feeling of ache and want, and I wanted no one to stop him.

He pulled his teeth from my skin slowly, and I gasped for breath as his magic pulled away.

More. The thought rang out in my head, and I couldn't be sure that I didn't say it aloud. But it was all I could think. More. More. More. He was my mate, and I wanted more.

I blinked my eyes open, and Evren was gripping both of my arms. He pulled me into him, and I had no choice but to allow it. Pressing against his chest, I took a deep breath of the scent of him. My nose buried in his neck, and I clung to him hard. Refusing to let go.

“Princess,” Evren whispered my name, and his voice sounded so much clearer, stronger than before.

I didn't answer him. I simply snuggled in harder against his chest and tightened my arms around him.

“It's okay.” He ran his hands over my hair, and I could feel myself trembling against him. “Everything is going to be okay.”

My legs were straddled around his waist, and I could hear the murmur of voices behind us, but I couldn't bring myself to care. In that moment, it didn't matter what any of them thought of me. All I could think about was him and the deep ache coursing inside of me.

“I need you.” I let the plea fall from my lips that still pressed against his neck.

Evren groaned but didn't try to stop me. I pressed my lips to his neck and his hand ran down the length of my spine. My marks were aflame along my skin, and the ache between my thighs was overpowering.

I could focus on nothing else.

“I need you all to leave.” He growled, but I was far too bewitched by my want for him to know if they listened.

“Evren, I need you.” My voice sounded panicked and desperate, but I couldn't bring myself to care. Every breath of it was the truth.

“You hate me,” he whispered, and I forced myself to sit up and stare into his dark, tired eyes. “If I gave you what you wanted right now, you would hate me.”

Part of me knew he was probably right, but that didn't stop the anger from surging inside of me. I needed him. Needed him more than I had ever needed anything in my life, and he was going to deny me.

“Agree to be mine. Agree to marry me, and I’ll give you everything you want.”

My marks felt like they were burning me alive at his words. He had just gotten back. He had been insanely injured, and he was worried about marrying me?

“I don't want to be a part of your games.” I shook my head. “I don't want to be the answer to the prophecy.”

Evren ran his fingers over my face, pushing my hair back before gripping the back my neck. “This has nothing to do with that. Marry me because you want to. Marry me because I'm your mate.”

I pushed against his chest, frustration and want making me feel insane. It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him yes. To tell him that I would give him anything he wanted from me, but I couldn't do that. Not now. Not when there were still so many unanswered questions between us.

“I'm glad you're back.” I pushed farther away from him and realized in that moment that I was sitting across his lap wearing only his shirt. There were still others around us, but most had listened and left the room. But Queen Veda was watching us, her gaze bouncing back and forth between us, calculating our every touch, and I couldn't stand the way my stomach tightened in worry.

“Evren, we should talk.”

Evren looked up at his mother, and I dug my fingers into his chest. I didn't want to give him up to her. Not even for a second, and his gaze flew back to mine as if he, too, couldn’t fathom us leaving one another.