Be with Me (Wait for You #2)(93)

My brain got hung up on the past tense. Not the loved part being in the past but the reference to her. “What do you mean by ‘was,’ Cam?”

He blew out a long breath. “I’ve never told another soul any of this, Teresa. I don’t know if Jase even realizes that he told me all about her. We were drunk one night and got to talking, you know, back when I was on house arrest. He never brought her up again. He’ll talk to me about Jack, but not her.”

The ball of ice was starting to spread for a different reason. “Cam . . .”

“She’s dead, sis. She died shortly after Jack was born, in a car accident.”

I smacked my hand over my throat as I stared at my brother. “Oh, my God . . .”

“I don’t know a lot about her parents, but I think they were kind of like Avery’s—-very concerned about perception and shit. I got the impression that they sent her away when she got pregnant and had wanted her to give Jack up, but Jase’s parents stepped in. I know Jase and Kari were together since they were thirteen or so. And I do know that he cared very deeply for her and as long as I’ve known Jase, he’s never been serious about another girl.”

My chest ached as it all started to click together. The girl . . . Jack’s mother was dead? That had never crossed my mind. At all. But it made sense. Holy crap, what was worse than having someone break your heart? Having your heart broken because someone died.

“The fact that Jase even told you about Jack blows my mind. No one but his family knows the truth, and her family, I don’t think, lives around here anymore,” he explained. “Once I realized he’d told you, I backed off, because I knew he was for real if he told you. At least, I hoped he was, but . . .”

“But he hasn’t gotten over her, has he?” I said, hurting for him, because I could not imagine what it must be like to lose someone I loved to something so final. “That’s why. Oh, my God . . .”

“I don’t know, Teresa. I’m not sure he’s still in love with her. I mean, I’m sure he does in a way, but I think . . . God, he’ll kill me for this, but I think he’s scared of caring for someone else and then losing them.”

“Really?” Doubt colored my tone.

“Look at it this way. He didn’t have a normal situation. They were young and she got pregnant. Her parents sent her away and then his folks step in and adopt the kid. So both of them—-Jase and Kari—-saw Jack afterward, knowing that’s their son, but no one else does. It was their secret and who knows what they planned for the future.”

I knew what Jase had said about not wanting Jack at first, but that had changed afterward. And it could’ve changed while Kari was still around.

“And then she dies, completely unexpectedly and young. Those kinds of situations, wrapped all together, have got to mess with someone. So I don’t think he’s still in love with her. I think he’s scared of loving someone else.”

“Then that would have to mean that he loves me, and I don’t think that’s the case.”

He smiled a little. “He risked my wrath to get with you and he told you about Jack. I’m telling you what, Teresa. He has to have—-”

“It doesn’t matter,” I cut him off, because I didn’t need to hear that Jase potentially loved me. It would just fill my head with fairy tales and my chest with hope. What Jase had said to me after having sex was nothing more than a product of an orgasm. “I can’t compete with Kari. No one can.”

“Teresa—-”

“I don’t want you saying anything to him,” I insisted. “I’m serious, Cam. I know you want to thump him upside the head or something, but please let it go, because . . .” Because I truly felt bad for him. Knowing about Kari made this different. Didn’t mean I wasn’t upset with him, because he had hurt me, but he had been hurt in one of the worst ways. “Because it doesn’t matter and I’m okay.”

His brows rose. “You don’t look okay.”

I glanced down at the tentlike quilt. “Thanks.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.” He patted in the general vicinity of my good knee. “I’m just worried about you. You’ve been through a lot.”

“I’m okay, but you’ve got to promise you won’t say anything to him. Just leave it alone. Please, Cam.”

He sighed. “Okay. I won’t say anything. You were right earlier when you said it’s not any of my business, but seeing how upset you are and not slamming my—-”

“I get it,” I said, smiling slightly. “You can’t always take care of things for me, you know?”

Cam laughed. “Says who?”

Shaking my head, I settled back. Having a little more background on what made Jase tick helped, but it didn’t make the heartache any better. Kind of made it all the more sad.

At the sound of a knock on the door, Cam rose. “That’s probably going to be Avery. You up for some girl time?”

“Girl time?”

He made a face. “Whatever. You want her in?”

“Sure.” Hanging out with someone was better than sitting here alone feeling sorry for myself.

If Avery knew what was going on, she wisely chatted about everything and anything else while she coaxed me off the couch and helped me straighten the apartment. The place was a mess. Partly not my fault. Cam had vacuumed and dusted around the time the president was last inaugurated.