Baby Love(93)

"I don't remember my mother Judge; she died before I was a year old."

"Dead? How is that possible? She would only be what 39 or 40 years old now?"

I explained to him what Maggie had told Trey and I about Matthew Renaud and the night he presented my mother to the judge at his bachelor party in New Orleans. It was the night that I was conceived. I mentioned the part about the pearl necklace and earrings and my mother telling Maggie that the judge had told her that he loved her. He listened intently, never interrupting to confirm or deny. I ended the story with her death though I wasn't sure of the exact date.

"It’s all true," he admitted not hiding the sadness and regret in his voice.

"Marley was a virgin when I took her that night. I was drunk and enjoying the last of my bachelor life. I am ashamed to say this but I thought she was like the other girls that were there that night to service the men. I swear I felt horrible after what I had done."

I wanted him to tell me about my mother. I wanted to hear about her from someone that had cared about her.

"Can you tell me anything about her?" I asked my voice cracking.

"She was beautiful - like you are. She was feisty which of course made her that much more desirable. I romanced her that evening. I listened to her talk about her hopes and dreams for the future. She had distinct plans for her life. She didn't care for New Orleans. She wanted to move back home to Mississippi and get a job to put herself through college. I remember her saying she didn't care to continue living with her sister and brother now that she had turned eighteen a couple of months previously."

He stopped for a moment and sighed.

"I asked her if she wanted to go upstairs where we could talk more privately as the party was getting fairly lively downstairs. We had rented two floors of the hotel for that weekend. She agreed. I took her to my suite and we sat on the bed sipping champagne and sharing bits and pieces of our lives with each other. I still was under the impression that she was . . . well uh . . ."

"A whore?" I finished for him.

"Yes."

" May I call you 'Tylar'?"

"Yes of course," I replied stiffly.

"Tylar I don't want to go into any further detail about what happened after that. It was a private night between your mother and me. Suffice it to say that I realized very quickly that she was an innocent. She had been telling the truth when she tried to shove me off of her telling me that she was a virgin. I honestly thought that it was part of her 'routine' I guess. I felt horrible afterwards but she stayed with me the whole night. She didn't have to; I offered to have a limo dispatched to take her home."

At this point I heard the judge chuckle softly. What had he found funny about the apparent ravaging of my mother? I wanted to hate him but for some reason I couldn't.

"After she verbally berated me for my 'animalistic' behavior I think was what she called it, she claimed she wanted to wash my 'stench' off of her. She ordered me to draw her a bubble bath which I did. I was falling all over myself to make it up to her. She took a leisurely bath and then put the hotel robe on and climbed into bed. She instructed me not to get any ideas; she just wanted me to hold her in my arms while we slept. I did as ordered and we slept curled up in each other's arms all night. It was the best night's sleep that I had ever had; I've not had another night's rest quite like it since."

I felt the tears running down my face hearing his story. There must have been something about him that my mother trusted. The very brief interlude that they had with one another had somehow formed a connection.

That connection was me. Could my mother have suspected then that she had conceived?

"What happened after that?" I asked him.

"I drove her home the next morning still apologizing to her. I told her that I was to be married soon but that I needed to see her to be with her. I told her that I wanted to make love to her properly. She asked me if I was still going to be married. I said that I was. She told me that she didn't roll that way."

(Oh my God! She sounded so much like me!)

"The rest you already know Tylar. Your aunt's account of what happened over the next couple of weeks is all accurate. I did love my sweet Marley. I always have."

I needed to get off the phone. This was all too emotional for me.

"Does your phone have video capabilities?" I asked him.

"Yes it does."

"I would like to forward the video I recorded of my aunt's deathbed conversation. There are parts of it that you need to hear. Perhaps you can help with untangling some of this. I know that you are a busy man Judge Tylar."

"Please call me Preston."

"Uhh - I don't think that I can do that sir."

"Why not?"

"Because my baby daughter is named Preston."

"I see," he said.

I felt his smile over the phone.

"So it appears that I am a grandfather as well as a father?"

"Only if you believe what I am telling you is the truth," I answered.

"I believe it is the truth. I'm only sorry that Marley didn't let me know. It would have changed everything," he said with a sigh.

"Would you consider calling me 'Dad' or 'Father'?" he asked tentatively.

It was my turn to smile into the phone.