Baby Love(101)

My heart broke when I heard that! I asked him flat out if he was still going to get married after what we had done together last night. He said that he had to but he still wanted to be with me. I told him that I didn't roll that way!

October 25, 1989

Preston Tylar has been sending me flowers every day! He calls on the phone nearly every day too! I cry at night in my bed thinking about how I let him ruin me! I don't take his calls even though Matthew wants me to. I hate Matthew for what I now know that he is! I hate that my own sister hadn't warned me about him and the kind of monster that he is. I know what he makes Maggie do! He won't do that to me! I will see him dead first!



October 30, 1989

Preston Tylar came to our house this evening! Matthew called me downstairs and told me to go into the parlor. He shut the door behind me! Preston came to me and hugged me tightly. He gave me his business card and said if I ever needed anything to call him. I could reach him at his office number. He gave me two beautiful blue velvet jewelry boxes. One had pearl earrings in it and the other one a pearl drop necklace. He said that they belonged to his grandmother and he wanted me to have them. I'm not sure why.

He leaned down and kissed me ever so sweetly, pulling me against him tightly. I could even feel him get hard down there. He said he was getting married soon but that he would never forget me. He whispered "I love you sweet Marley," into my ear. He left stopping on the way out to say something very quietly to Matthew that I couldn't hear. He jabbed his finger into Matthew's chest and then left. Whatever he had said shook Matthew up good. I went upstairs and told Maggie about it. I collapsed across my bed and cried. Maggie was getting ready for one of her "dates." She said the best way to get over one man was to get another one underneath you as soon as possible!

I don't ever want to have my heart broken again but I will never be the way Maggie is! I guess I love Preston Tylar.

December 3, 1989

I took a home pregnancy test today. I'm pregnant with Preston's child. I made the mistake of telling Maggie and of course she went straight to Matthew! Maggie wants me to tell Judge Tylar but I won't do that. I won't disrupt his life. I promise that I will love this child with all of my hear t though! I hope boy or girl it's as pretty as its daddy! Preston Tylar is so handsome!!



July 1, 1990

I saw in the paper today that Preston James Tylar was appointed as a federal judge in Baton Rouge. His picture was in the paper. He is so beautiful. His wife was standing next to him.



July 14, 1990

My beautiful baby girl was born today! She was born behind a veil which Miss Trinity says is a sign of good favor from the Lord! I am so happy because I was afraid God would be angry about me having a bastard child. Miss Trinity gave me directions on how to preserve the caul. She said to keep it intact for good luck going forward. I want to go back to Mississippi.

I hate Matthew. Maggie hates him too! I want out of New Orleans. Maggie and I are both tired of Matthew's bossy ways. He has not crossed me at all since Preston said whatever he said to him that day we said good-bye. I don't trust him though. He is way too shady. Maggie is afraid of him big-time.





July 17, 1990

I'm calling my baby Tylar Jamie Renaud. She is so very precious. I am breast feeding her and she takes very well to it. She sleeps in bed with me. I don't want Matthew near her! Maggie bought her some diapers. Matthew told me that I had to sign up for welfare benefits. I'm so ashamed…



July 21, 1990

I took Tylar to the doctor today. We got the medical card for her. Matthew made sure I signed up for food stamps also.

The doctor says that she is a very healthy baby. I am going to make sure that she stays that way! I'm getting out of here as soon as I can find a way to do it! Maggie says that Matthew will hunt us down and kill us if we try to leave. Let him try!



That was the last paper in the stack of my mother's notes. I felt the tears streaming down my face. My poor mother. Why had she been too proud to call my father? If she had, she would be alive today I was sure of it.

I folded the notebook papers back up and put them in the top dresser drawer. I would make copies of them in Trey's office. I wanted my father to read them. I had to smile as I recalled that my father had left out one important part of the story: the part where my mom had awakened him during their only night together wanting more. Did he think my knowing that would somehow make me think less of her? Dad needed to understand how I rolled.

I finished up cleaning out all of the closets before Jean was ready to leave. I paid her and said that I would see her on Thursday.

Preston was ready to eat so I got some of the pureed food out to see how she did with it. I had made some banana mixed with rice cereal. The Baby M.D. website I visited said it would keep her bowel movements firm.

She loved the taste of it ready for more each time she took a spoonful. She even made the "Mmmm" sound. She finished a small jar and I cleaned her face up. I settled down the on couch in the living room with her and turned on the flat screen. I raised my shirt up as I hadn't put a bra on yet today and let her have at it.

Trey called while I was still nursing her. I grabbed my Blackberry from the coffee table.

"Hey you," he said, "I miss you."

My butterflies swirled as I smiled into the phone.

"I miss you too Trey."