Absorbed(3)

“I take it you haven’t,” Kylie says at last once she realizes that she’s not going to get any type of response from me. She scratches her mess of blue and black hair, shaking her head. “You disappoint me, Lucas.”

Her words feel like claws down the side of my face, and I give her a look that would make anyone else lose their nerve. Kylie doesn’t so much as move a muscle. “Have you contacted—” I begin, but once I see how her face falls, how her chest suddenly hitches, I catch myself. I’m a f*cking monster for wanting to take my frustrations out on her simply because I’m hurting.

I’m a f*cking monster, period.

“Have you talked to Sienna?” I ask instead.

My sister relaxes, leans back and hugs her arms over her chest. The motion shifts her t-shirt, and I’m shocked that there’s no fresh ink on the left side of her chest, which is already covered in tiny blackbirds.

Getting a new bird immediately after a parting with Wyatt has always been Kylie’s forte.

She must realize where my thoughts have shifted to because she flushes and adjusts her shirt, covering the majority of the tattoos. “No, I haven’t talked to her. Not because I don’t want to, but because she’s disconnected her number. And that’s why I’m here.”

My eyebrow jerks up in surprise. “Even Lucas-Fucking-Wolfe can’t make AT&T change someone’s number back, Ky. And my connections probably aren’t good enough to get her new number. Her friends and family f*cking despise me.”

“I need her address.”

“Don’t you think you might piss her off by showing up at her house?” I’ve unraveled her so much that, at this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if she called the cops on my sister.

Kylie jumps to her feet, clenching her hands by her side. “Don’t you give a shit about what happens to her?” She takes a shuddering breath. “Or, let me guess, she means about as much as one of your groupies to you, huh? Guess Sam did the right thing by scaring her off.”

I feel like she’s just punched the air right out of my lungs.

If I didn’t care about what happened to Sienna, she would be here with me right now, and there’d be no reason for Kylie to stop by and play my goddamn therapist. I wouldn’t care that my time with Sienna could be cut short at any moment. I wouldn’t care about what Sam would do to her, to me. I wouldn’t give a f*ck about anything but making myself happy for however long that feeling would last.

No, I care too much.

I flip my notebook closed and shove it aside because it’s impossible for me to write anything today.

“She moved.”

Kylie sits back down, gritting her teeth and shaking her head. “You’re lying.”

I press my lips together and meet my sister’s gaze full on. Our eyes challenge each other for several seconds before I finally shake my head. “I know where she used to live, but now I’ve got no clue.”

“Can’t you find out?”

“No,” I say. “Because I shouldn’t be a part of her life.”

The determination leaves my sister’s expression and is replaced by disbelief. “There’s so much that I want to say, but I doubt it’ll make a difference. And I’m sure that even if I did, you’d just throw my own shit back into my face. But I know you don’t want this. I know you must love—”

I cut her off before she goes too far. “You must not know me all that well.” It even sounds half-hearted, and Kylie gives me a grim smile.

“Fair enough.” I struggle to control my breathing as my sister gathers her belongings, stopping to grab a stack of mail off the desk next to the couch. She says nothing more as she moves about the room, but when she gets to the door she looks over her shoulder. “Don’t think for a second that I buy any of that hard-ass crap. If I told you that I was over McCrae, would you believe me?”

Despite the pain rolling through every part of my body, I allow the corners of my lips to lift into a sorry excuse for a smile. “No, I wouldn’t buy that shit for a second.”

Kylie grips the doorframe. “Then make things right. Screw Sam, screw the past, screw being afraid.”

When she starts to leave, I clear my throat. “Will you take your own advice?” I demand. She freezes, and I stare at her tensed back for a long pause before she glances back over her shoulder.

“Yeah, eventually I will.”