A Million Kisses in Your Lifetime(111)

“I want to plan something for your birthday. Something special. Just for the two of us,” he says.

I don’t know how my father will feel about that, but I don’t mention that. “Okay.”

“Good luck with studying. And your paper.” Yet another kiss, this one long and filled with tongue. “Text me later.”

“Bye,” I whisper.

I watch him walk away before I finally turn and head into my dorm, waving at the RAs sitting behind the desk as I walk past. I’m in my room in minutes, changing out of my uniform and pulling on sweats. I crack open my laptop and settle in, opening the paper I’ve been working on for history.

This is the absolute last thing I want to do, but I remind myself once tomorrow is over, the rest of the week is fairly simple. I can handle this. A paper. Some studying. A final. Then it’s easy-peasy until we’re out of school for break.

I can’t wait. I want to spend time with Crew before we have to leave. And then I want to spend more time with him when we’re both home. Winter break can be so depressing for me sometimes, even though it’s my birthday and Christmas and all of those good times, where you’re supposed to be making memories and having a great time.

I’m usually just with my parents. We don’t have much extended family, and the last few years, Daddy never wanted to go on vacation over the holidays, claiming he had too much work to catch up on.

Now I’m actually excited for break. For all the possibilities that come with it.

Like spending ample time with Crew.

I’m going to have to tell Daddy about him sometime. Mom probably won’t care so much, but Daddy will. He has all of these expectations on me that I can no longer meet.

I can’t meet them. Not anymore.

Really don’t want to anymore either.

I’m staring at my laptop screen, trying to get up the energy to finish writing this history paper when my phone rings.

It’s Daddy.

I answer immediately, greeting him with, “Hi. I was just thinking about you.”

“Really? Looks like you weren’t thinking much about me over the weekend, am I right?” His tone is harsh, full of barely-restrained anger.

I frown, slamming my laptop shut. “What do you mean?”

“You think I don’t know?”

My heart lodges in my throat, making it hard for me to breathe. “Don’t know what?”

“Who you were with this weekend? What you two were doing? I’m disappointed in you, Wren. You broke your promise.”

Oh God. How does he know? How did he find out? Who told him?

“Daddy, wait—”

“I don’t want to hear your excuses or your lies. Because that’s what you did, Wren. You lied to me. You told me you were going to Vermont with Maggie when you didn’t. You went with that insufferable—boy and did inappropriate things. You shared a bed with him. I know you did. I saw the proof.”

My brain is scrambling, trying to keep up with what he’s saying. “How do you know?”

“I’m glad you’re not trying to deny it. You’re doing the right thing.” He hesitates only for a moment. Long enough for me to realize tears are running down my face. “I have access to your iCloud. I logged in and saw the inappropriate photos.”

I briefly close my eyes, my heart sinking fast. I remember the photos I took of Crew that Saturday night. With his shirt off and my lip-gloss imprint on his chest. Much later that night, after we’d had sex twice and we were about to fall asleep, I took one last photo of the two of us lying in bed, my head resting on his naked shoulder, our gazes sleepy, our smiles full of satisfaction as I took a selfie. I wanted to document the moment. The night I gave my virginity to Crew.

And my father saw all of it. Even the photos I took Saturday afternoon of us downtown. The decorations. Crew sitting across from me at lunch.

None of those photos were meant for anyone else’s eyes but mine. And Crew’s.

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?” Daddy asks when I remain quiet.

“What am I supposed to say? I can’t defend myself. You’ve seen all the evidence.” I swallow hard. “I didn’t know you had access to my iCloud.”

“That’s clear,” he retorts. “From everything I saw on your most recent camera roll, I almost regret looking.”

That’s false. I’m sure he doesn’t regret it, since he finally caught me in a lie. Like he’s been hoping to catch me in one all of these years. Why else would he need access to my iCloud account?

Because he doesn’t trust me. He’s never fully trusted me after I did something so incredibly stupid when I was twelve.

Well, I’m not twelve anymore. I’d like to think I’m smarter than I was. I’m definitely stronger.

I think.

“You’re coming home now,” he demands. “Tonight.”

“Daddy! I can’t. I have finals to complete. I’m writing a paper right now!”

“I’ll call the school and you can do everything online. I’ll tell them it’s a family emergency—which it is,” he says. “Don’t argue with me, Wren. You’re coming home early.”

“Daddy, please. Listen to me. I have to finish this paper and study for the final. It’s all happening tomorrow. It’s my first class since we’re on a finals’ schedule this week. How about I come home after that? The rest of my classes, I’m pretty much done.”