A Grimm Warning (The Land of Stories, #3)(24)

“That’s adorable! Who is he?” Alex whispered to Red.

“That’s Porridge’s new son,” Red whispered back. “They call him Oats.”

Not too long after Oats reached the front of the clearing, his cream-colored mother trotted down the aisle behind him with a bouquet of daisies in her mouth. Once she joined her son and the others by the pulpit she quickly chewed up the flowers in her mouth and swallowed them.

“Everyone, if you still have your legs, please stand for the bride,” Mother Goose asked.

The guests stood and turned to the back of the clearing. Red stayed seated until Alex pulled her up to her feet.

A flock of sparrows perched high in the trees began to sing a beautiful ballad as Goldilocks appeared. She was stunning. She wore a simple but elegant white lacy dress with a long train. She was barefoot and her golden locks of hair flowed all the way down to her waist. Wildflowers had been wrapped around the handle of her sword and she carried it down the aisle like a bouquet. It was beautiful but lethal, just like Goldilocks.

Despite all the gruesome guests, no one could deny that the ceremony had turned out to be beautiful. Goldilocks arrived at the pulpit and she and Jack faced Mother Goose with tears of joy in their eyes.

“Well, sit down already,” Mother Goose ordered the crowd. Once they’d obeyed she continued officiating. “Four score and seven years ago—whoops, wrong speech! sorry—Dearly beloved, we are gathered God knows where today to celebrate the joining of these two wanted fugitives.”

Mother Goose turned to face Jack. “Jack, do you take Goldilocks, a woman charged with countless burglaries, breaking and entering, and running from the law—”

“Don’t forget attempted murder!” Red called toward the pulpit.

“I wasn’t going to,” Mother Goose said. “And attempted murder, to be your outlawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, in arrest and in imprisonment, until death do you part?”

There was no question in Jack’s mind. “I do,” he said with the biggest smile he had ever been seen with.

Mother Goose turned to Goldilocks. “Goldilocks, do you take this man, a national hero whose reputation you single-handedly ruined, to be your outlawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health, in arrest and in imprisonment, until death do you part?”

Goldilocks had never looked so happy in her life. “I do,” she said.

“Well, in that case let’s get this thing over with!” Mother Goose called out. “With the power semi-entrusted in me by the Happily Ever After Assembly, I now pronounce you husband and wife! You may kiss the—”

Before she could permit it, Jack and Goldilocks locked lips and their crowd of guests cheered wildly. Once they were done kissing, they climbed astride Porridge and galloped back down the aisle and off into the sunset with Oats following closely behind.

Mother Goose snapped her fingers and a sign magically appeared over Porridge’s back. It read:





Just Married


Watching the wedding had somehow made all of Alex’s fears and doubts about taking a walk with Rook go away. She wanted to be just as happy as Jack and Goldilocks one day and she didn’t care how many emotional obstacles she’d have to go through to get there.

“All right, now everyone get out of here before I’m seen with you,” Mother Goose said. “And to that ogre in the back—you still owe me seventeen gold coins from our card game last week! I haven’t forgotten!”

All the guests disappeared into the forest as quickly as they had appeared. Froggy joined Alex and Red in the center of the clearing and gave Alex an enormous hug.

“Hello, Alex! It’s always wonderful to see you!” he said. “Lovely wedding, don’t you think?”

“It was beautiful,” Alex said. “Don’t you think it was beautiful, Red?”

Red didn’t respond. Her arms were crossed and she was frowning in the direction Jack and Goldilocks had ridden off in.

“Darling, what’s wrong?” Froggy asked. “Didn’t you enjoy the ceremony?”

“I did,” Red said unconvincingly. “Especially the dress—because it was mine! She stole it from me!”





CHAPTER FIVE





INSIGHT AT THE GRAVE SITE


After being on the plane for what felt like a week, Conner and the others finally reached London’s Heathrow Airport, where they boarded their connecting flight to Berlin. Seeing so many people of different cultures and nationalities traveling around them made Conner feel very worldly. He was sure he’d return home much more dignified than when he left—dignified but exhausted, that is. By the time their second flight touched German ground, Conner had only slept three hours of their fifteen-hour journey, and wondered if his neck would ever recover from sitting in a cramped position for so long.

“I recommend we try to sleep as soon as we get to the hotel,” Mrs. Peters instructed her group as she led the way to the baggage claim area. “We don’t want to be too jet-lagged for the readings tomorrow.”

Mrs. Peters, Bree, and the Book Huggers collected their luggage at the baggage claim with no problem, but Betsy was nowhere to be found. Conner wasn’t worried about his luggage being lost, though. On the contrary, he thought wearing the same clothes for the next few days might be worth not having to lug the decaying trunk around Germany. Just as he had happily come to terms with the idea, Betsy slid down into the luggage carousel, making more noise than any other suitcase had. Betsy had arrived in Germany and she wanted everyone to know about it.