A Feather on the Water(98)

Later, in the office, Martha asked Kitty what she was planning to do when she was living in New York.

“I’ll try to find a job,” Kitty said. “I thought I might be able to get something in an office. But what I’d really like to do is study art. Charlie says there’s a school of art at Columbia. But I’m not sure I’m good enough to get into a university.”

“Kitty!” Martha rolled her eyes. “You’re so talented. Your drawings are beautiful.”

“I don’t know if we’d be able to afford it, though—not with Charlie studying as well.”

“I think there are scholarships available at Columbia.”

“Even for foreign students?”

“You’d count as an American citizen now that you’re married, so that wouldn’t be a problem.” Martha smiled. “I want you to promise me you’ll apply.”

“Okay, I promise.” Kitty smiled back, but Martha could see that it was an effort. She looked as if she were about to burst into tears. “We will see each other again, won’t we? You are going back to New York when the camp closes?”

“That’s the plan, but I’ve got a few mountains to climb to get there.”

“Because of Stefan?”

Martha nodded. “I can’t imagine my life without him. I’d marry him tomorrow if I could.”

“It seems so unfair that you can’t get a divorce. I wish there was something I could do to help. Do you think I could try to find Arnie for you?”

“That’s sweet of you, but it’d be like looking for a needle in a haystack. New York is a huge city. And I don’t even know if he’s still there. He could’ve gone back to Louisiana, for all I know.”

“Is that far from New York?”

“About fifteen hundred miles.”

Kitty’s eyes widened.

“I think you’ll be amazed when you see what a vast country America is,” Martha said. “You’ll get an idea when you fly to San Francisco.” She huffed out a sigh. “Makes it all the more senseless, when you think of how much space there is, that the government’s so dead set against letting DPs in.”



On the day Kitty boarded the train for the coast, Martha and Delphine tried to cheer each other up with plans for Christmas. They were wrapping presents for all the children in the camp in remnants of pretty, shiny fabric from the weaving shed. Each little bundle, tied with string, contained a packet of gum, a bar of chocolate, and a box of Sun-Maid raisins—all taken from the Red Cross delivery that had arrived earlier in the week.

“It’s not much, really, is it?” Martha said. “But at least we have something to give them this year.”

“Are you going to invite Stefan and the girls over for Christmas?” Delphine glanced up from the table.

“Well, I’ve been thinking about that,” Martha said. “I thought it would be okay to invite him for a meal with us.”

“I think it would be better for the girls if they stayed the night. Great fun for them, waking up with all the other kids on Christmas morning.”

“I suppose so. But I doubt they’d want to be parted from Stefan. And it would be miserable for him, being alone in the cabin on Christmas Eve.”

“I didn’t mean the girls should come without him,” Delphine replied. “He could stay here, couldn’t he? As a guest, for a couple of nights. I’m sure there’s nothing in the rules about that.”

“Here? You mean . . .” Martha glanced toward the staircase.

“Why not? I could take the girls to sleep next door. They’d love that. You know how they idolize Wolf and the others.”

Martha felt a blush rise up to her cheeks. From the sound of it, Delphine had been planning this for a while. The chance of spending a whole night alone with Stefan would be the best Christmas present she could wish for. But she didn’t know if he would want it. Was it still too soon for him? And what if people found out that they’d spent the night together? “That’s really thoughtful.” She reached across the table and squeezed Delphine’s hand. “But how would it look to everyone else?”

“No one needs to know.” Delphine shrugged. “I’m pretty sure they’ll all be too drunk to notice where he sleeps.”

Martha nodded. If last year was anything to go by, memories of the three days of Christmas would be at best hazy. “I suppose I could ask him,” she murmured.



The next day, Stefan arrived with the girls to start his new job as Kitty’s replacement. It was strange having him working alongside her in the office. Like turning the clock back to those first days in the camp, when he had been her shadow. She couldn’t remember exactly when the easy companionship between them had developed an edge of tension brought on by suppressed desire. Now he was behaving as if he were treading on eggshells. He was being so polite, so careful in everything he said and did. It made her nervous about broaching the subject of Christmas. She rehearsed what she might say, but every time she ran it through her head, it sounded as if she were trying to corner him into sleeping with her.

It was only when they went out into the woods together a few days later to gather foliage to decorate the mess hall that she plucked up the courage. Something about being outside among the trees seemed to free her mind in a way that rarely happened in the confines of the office. She put her hand on his arm as he reached to cut a pine bough. “Stefan, would you and the girls like to come and stay here for a couple of nights over Christmas?”