Wrong for You (Before You #3)(56)
“Alec f*cking Reed, Chasing Ruin’s drummer,” Ryder interrupted. “I thought your name sounded familiar when Vi mentioned it, but holy shit, it really is you. I’m a huge fan.”
Ryder patted Alec on the back like they were long lost friends and Violet…she did nothing. She couldn’t. Her eyes ping ponged back and forth between her brother and Alec, and for the first time in her life, she couldn’t say a word. Alec’s eyes searched hers, pleadingly for something. She didn’t know what because she was still trying to process that Alec might not be Alec, or at the least the Alec she thought she knew. As the minutes ticked ominously, her heart sped up with every inhalation and exhalation until she wondered if it would explode in her chest while she waited for Alec to say something, anything, either acknowledging or denying her brother’s words.
“When is the band starting work on the new album?” Ryder asked, looking at Alec with total, sickening fan worship and her stomach lurched.
Silence hung in the room, a tangible presence, heavy and awkward, pressing on her chest. Her fingernails dug into her palms until she was sure she drew blood.
“Next week,” Alec said without looking away from her, his eyes tormented and shadowed.
The room swayed, anger and deceit slicing through her body one tiny invisible, but no less painful, swipe at a time. Until that moment, she had hoped there was a mistake or some explanation, but with those two words Alec shattered her last remnant of hope and all the dreams she’d been building with Alec in her mind. In its place, a big voluminous void of loathing sucked at her soul.
“Violet,” Alec said, his voice low and cautious as he reached for her hand, but the minute he made contact, she ripped her hand away from him. His touch caused icy anger to crept in her veins.
“Wait,” Ryder said, looking between the two of them. “Are you dating my sister?”
“Yes.”
“No,” she snapped so loud that she hoped it erased Alec’s admission because whatever they’d been doing, she had no intention of continuing. He took what they had and threw it away before it even started and, at that instant, she didn’t know if she’d ever recover from his callous game.
“Can I talk to you outside for a minute?”
“I’m good. I’ve heard everything I need to hear,” she said, taking a deep breath, trying to beat back the roller coaster of emotions whipping through her. A part of her wanted to walk down her long stretch of hallway and climb back into bed and pretend as though nothing happened, that Alec didn’t just rip her heart out by admitting that everything was a lie, a big fat lie from the first day he walked into her life. But this was reality, and no matter how long she hid, it wouldn’t matter. It wouldn’t change that she’d just spent almost four weeks with a person she knew nothing about. With that thought, a cold sweat rippled through her body, making her lightheaded. “Um, I need a minute,” she said, walking backwards out of the room, needing to be alone. She didn’t want to fall apart in front of Alec and her brother.
She heard Alec and Ryder’s voices as she retreated, but she couldn’t even process the words. Blind panic slithered through her until she became an unfocused shell of herself. The minute she walked into the room she collapsed onto her bed, holding the pillow over her face, squeezing her eyes shut, hoping it would keep reality away, but…f*ck…it smelled like him and she couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. Every kiss, every touch, every smile they had shared flickered through her mind, tormenting her.
Maybe a minute or an hour later, she didn’t know, the bed dipped next to her and she didn’t bother lifting the pillow from her now dry face. Ryder or Alec, it didn’t matter which one. She didn’t want to talk to either at that moment.
“Little Violet,” Alec said, his deep voice hoarse, thick, and swimming with regret. “I’m so sorry.”
With those words, the dull ache in her chest expanded and accelerated until she was sure she was bleeding, and not just metaphorically. “Why?” she said, forcing the words from her too dry throat.
“I can explain,” he said, running his fingertips along her bare exposed arm, her skin prickling. She flinched, twisting her body away from him, hating his lying touch.
When he didn’t stop, she threw the pillow covering her face across the room. “You can explain why you made a fool out of me or why you toyed with a dumb, small town girl? Did you do this as some sick, twisted game because I didn’t recognize you?”
Alec’s eyes darted away, guilt carved into every line of his face. She could almost see his mind turning, relentlessly searching for a reason that would explain why he lied about his identity. “It wasn’t like that. I didn’t…” his voiced trailed off as though he couldn’t find the right words.
She wanted to scream at him, hit him. Instead, a sharp peel of laughter exploded out of her mouth, exposing the otherwise hidden level of hysteria that crept into her mind. He was the one who made her dinner, who kissed her, who made her fall in love with him. Just as the thought registered, her stomach revolted, twisting uncomfortably inside of her, because it was the truth. She still loved Alec, but now she didn’t even know what that meant because she didn’t even know him…not the real him, anyway. She rolled onto her side, draping a limp arm over her face. She didn’t want him to see the tears that broke free once again, carrying away little bits of her heart with them as they washed down her face and evaporated into thin air. If only the memory of him could evaporate as easily… “Can you go? You’ve had your fun,” she said in a strangled voice.