Worth It (Forbidden Men #6)(61)

“No. I started it. I deserved it.”

“No, Max and Mercedes started it. They went for each other’s throats, and we took sides...against each other.”

I didn’t answer, still upset over how easily I’d struck out at her. She had become the most important, precious person to me, and I’d hurt her. I never, ever wanted to hurt her.

The urge to vomit rose again, but City’s fingers in my hair soothed me. I pulled my nose from her hair to look her in the eye. “I don’t even know why I was so defensive of Mercy. She certainly isn’t a saint. And tricking a pregnancy out of your brother to get some money from him was awful.”

“I was no better. What Max said was worse than horrible. I mean, I have never seen him like that. He’s always been the nice, protective brother. He’s never said anything so crude or heartless to me before.”

“That’s because you’re like him.”

When she pulled away to look up at me, her eyes wide, she asked, “Is that how you see me, too? Like him?”

I closed my eyes and shook my head. “No. You’re just...you’re you, not a part of that at all, and I shouldn’t have accused you of thinking like him. I was wrong. I was so wrong.”

“Shh.” She pressed two fingertips to my lips. “It’s over. We both apologized, admitted we were wrong, and our siblings were wrong, and the entire situation was messed up. But now it’s done, and I forgive you, and…you forgive me, right?”

I blinked, unprepared for the uncertain glance she sent me. “Of course, I forgive you.” There’d never been any question of that. I couldn’t even breathe when I merely thought of her not being in my life anymore. I loved this girl with everything inside me; I didn’t think it would be possible to not forgive her...for anything.

A grin bloomed across her face. “Good. Then everything’s fine again.”

But I couldn’t share her smile. I was still scared, even more scared now than I’d been before. We’d just survived our first fight. We’d worked through our problems, despite hurt feelings, because we cared so much about each other. That was a sign of commitment, of something deeper and binding. And yet, I had no idea how a future between us was going to work.

“So where do we go from here?” I asked, making her frown.

“What do you mean?”

I shook my head. “We chanced too much tonight. If your brother, or anyone, had seen us together, that would’ve been it. Your family would tear you away from me, and I’d fight to get back with you, and a freaking bloodbath would happen. Neither of our families are reasonable when it comes to each other. We’re not even reasonable when it comes to our families. We can’t let them know about us. We can’t let anyone know, and we can’t ever meet in public like this again. It’s too risky.”

Her blue eyes were full of fear as she whispered, “What’re you saying?”

“I’m saying it’s back to the woods. We only meet in the forest, and we keep this a secret until...”

“Until when?”

I sighed and pressed my forehead to hers. “I don’t know. Until we’re old enough to get out on our own and support ourselves, I guess. Until our parents have no custody over us and we can finally be together openly, where they can’t make any legal issues about it to keep us apart.”

“You mean, until my parents have no more rights to keep you away from me? Because you’re already eighteen, an adult in the eyes of the law. This is all about waiting on me? It’ll be two years and three weeks before I’m eighteen.”

“Actually.” I winced. “I was thinking we should wait until you get through college and get the degree you want first.”

Her jaw fell open. “Are you insane?”

I held up a hand. “Just hear me out. If you hooked up with me as soon as you turned eighteen, they might disown you and take away...I don’t know, inheritance shit, like paying for your college. I don’t want you to lose out on that. There’s no way I could support us and pay for your college.”

“But—”

“I’m not taking your education from you. Your psychology doctorate. That is your dream, City. And I want you to reach it.”

“And what if my dream includes having you in my life now?”

Relief washed over me as I cupped her face. “Baby, I’m not going anywhere. You are stuck with me. But if the only safe way I can see you right now is a few stolen hours here and there in the woods, then it’s worth it.”

Her eyes searched mine for a good ten seconds before she nodded and offered me a tremulous smile. “Okay, then,” she said. “It’s worth it to me too.”





It was barely light out the next morning as I hammered my fist against Pick’s front door.

Full of nothing but memories and questions, I hadn’t slept much the night before. I just tossed and turned on my borrowed bed. Around four in the morning, ten-year-old Colton joined me, crawling under the covers and trembling as he curled against me.

When I asked him what was wrong, all he mumbled was, “nightmare,” so I let it be and tucked him in tighter.

He dropped off again almost immediately, but I was left wide awake. About an hour or so later, I rose for the day, left a note so as not to alarm anyone, and snuck from the Gambles’ house before they stirred. Since we’d abandoned my car at Forbidden, I walked there to pick it up, thinking the fresh morning air would help me think, but it so didn’t. When I reached my car, the tire was freaking flat. Figured. So I kept walking to Pick’s place.