Witch's Pyre (Worldwalker #3)(32)

That seemed to bother Rowan even more. He opened his mouth to say something and then shut it again.

“What do you talk about with her that you can’t with your coven?” he asked. “And I don’t mean me. I mean Juliet. Una. Tristan.”

Lily shook her head. He didn’t understand. “It’s not what I tell her, it’s what she already knows. What she and I share.”

“Like what?”

“What it feels like to be the one who decides which of the people you love dies.”

Rowan stared at her for a long time. “This is about your Tristan. That’s why you’re so angry with me. It’s not about the cage anymore, is it?”

“I made Tristan my head mechanic when the Hive came for us. He wasn’t ready,” she said, her eyes dry and staring. “He wasn’t you.”

“I should have been there,” Rowan whispered.

“Yes,” Lily said, the anger returning swiftly and filling her to the brim. “You should have.” Lily forced herself back to being numb so the Hive wouldn’t be alerted. “Why didn’t you just come with us?”

Rowan’s lips pressed together. He either couldn’t, or wouldn’t, answer her. Her heart sinking, Lily went into her room and shut the door in Rowan’s face, both of them finally realizing what it was that Lily couldn’t forgive. His absence.

Carrick stood on the roof of the Governor’s Villa in front of the towering crystal his half brother had called a speaking stone. Warrior Sisters landed on the roof around him, cocking their bulbous heads. Carrick paid them no mind. Act calm, and they were calm. But that was the problem with insect Woven like them. No matter how many times people had heard to stay still and not swat at them, most couldn’t seem to help themselves when they heard the sound of those wings and saw the yellow and black of their bodies. Carrick wasn’t like most people, though.

The Sisters kept their distance and watched him while he looked at the speaking stone. He put a hand out and touched its surface. It felt warm.

Lillian, he called in mindspeak.

Carrick, she answered. He could feel her confusion. It had been many weeks since they had been able to reach each other in mindspeak. Where are you?

It’s been a long journey. So tiring, he said leadingly. Can you use the speaking stone to fuel me so I may give you a full report?

I’ve never heard of that being done before. I thought the speaking stones were just used for mindspeak.

Seems like an awful waste. Try it, he urged. Carrick thought that in some ways it was good that he hadn’t been trained at the Citadel. He didn’t know what was impossible. He smiled as he felt her feeding his willstone with strength and started his story with his abduction by the Hive.





CHAPTER


5


“You seem distracted.”

“Sorry,” Lily said. She brought herself back to the here and now with Toshi, which was a delightful brunch at a fancy restaurant by the ocean. She forced a smile, pretending to enjoy herself. “My coven is feeling very chatty today.”

Toshi was momentarily puzzled before understanding dawned on him. His brows drew together as he looked down at the pounding surf below them. “You can hear them mindspeaking right now?” he asked. Lily nodded. “How far away are they?”

“Scattered all over, enjoying the day,” Lily replied, lying with a shrug. No one in her coven was enjoying themselves. “Juliet and Tristan are near that scent bar you took me to. Caleb and Rowan are all the way east by the wall, and Una and Breakfast are having brunch at the villa.”

Toshi smiled. “Does that ever get annoying? Hearing their thoughts?”

“Oh, it’s annoying most of the time,” she said, making Toshi laugh. “But we’ve learned to give one another space when we need it.”

Reel him in, girl, Una said in mindspeak.

Didn’t you just hear me talking about space? I could use a little of that right about now, Lily replied.

Her coven was in her head, but they weren’t out enjoying another sun-soaked day in Bower City. They were watching the Hive while Lily was trying to woo Toshi into joining them.

This is hopeless, Lily said.

He wants to be claimed, Juliet coached. Keep at it.

Lily felt backed against a wall. For a moment she blocked everyone out but Juliet—the only person she felt safe enough to tell this to. What if I don’t want to claim him? What if I can’t do this anymore? I don’t want to be a leader anymore.

Lily saw possibilities racing through Juliet’s mind. Without more claimed, they were stuck in Bower City with no hope of escape. Juliet tried to picture what that would be like. She pictured the pretty gowns and the endless galas. It was the spitting image of a fairy ball where all the revelers were forced to dance until their feet bled. Juliet tried to imagine what it was like to never again be allowed to feel anger.

And without anger, Juliet said, how can anyone truly grieve? We’re all frozen inside, pretending we’re okay because none of us can get angry, so none of us can get over Tristan’s death. Least of all you. I know you doubt yourself and I know you’re hurting. I’ll give you ten seconds to wallow, and then you fight like hell to claim Toshi. I’m not living the rest of my life in a prison, and I’ll be damned if I let you do that, either.