Wishing for Wonderful (Serendipity #3)(37)

I know, you’re probably wondering why I married Raymond, but he wasn’t that way when we met. He was different then. I can’t honestly say if he changed, or if I was just blind to the truth of what he was because I wanted to believe I was in love with him. Everybody wants to be loved. It doesn’t matter if you’re nine or ninety, when a man looks at you with adoration in his eyes your heart melts. I could see Raymond was in love with me, and it wasn’t real hard to convince myself that I was just as much in love with him.

When I went off to college, I thought there’d never be anybody but John. Back then I used to picture how it would be, us married with a family of our own. Every day and sometimes twice a day, I’d write him a letter and say how much I loved him. For a while he answered most of my letters, but then his letters started getting shorter and further apart. In time they slowed to a trickle. Weeks would go by and there’d be no letter.

In the last month of my freshman year there was not a single letter; instead I got a postcard saying John had taken a summer job in the Catskills. He used up most of the card saying how he’d be working as a waiter and expected to get pretty good tips. Then at the very bottom he squeezed in a line promising he’d try to get home in time to see me before I returned to Kentucky.

I read that postcard a thousand times or more. I kept looking for a message written between lines, an indication John was still in love with me. It just wasn’t there.

That was the saddest summer I can ever remember. I didn’t even go home. I got a job selling tickets at the movie theatre and stayed in Kentucky. That was the summer I met Raymond.

I can’t recall who said absence makes the heart grow fonder, but I can say those are the words of a fool. It’s not true. Distance and long days apart wipe away the memory of sweet kisses and tender embraces. You feel empty inside and hungry for what you once had. In time somebody comes along and covers your mouth with more of those sweet kisses, and when that happens it’s not hard to convince yourself this is as good as what you once had. Of course it’s not, but it’s better than what you now have so you allow yourself to believe you’re in love.

I’ve grown fond of Lindsay, and I sure hope she doesn’t make the kind of mistakes I’ve made. I know she’s still getting over that boyfriend she had in New York, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t cross my mind that Matthew would be perfect for a girl like Lindsay. If it’s to be, it’s to be. One thing neither of them need is some old busybody meddling in their affairs.

Anyway, I’ve got my own troubles to worry about. Right now my biggest trouble is Ray. He’s got a real ugly attitude, and he’s said things meaner than you can imagine—things I haven’t even told John. If I did John would end up hating Ray, and what good would that do? When I feel really low, I think about how Lindsay has come around and I try to believe the same thing could happen with Ray. Sometimes I can talk myself into believing it; other times I know it’s just wishful thinking.





Cupid

Loving Lunch





Love makes anything believable. One zap from me, and the impossible becomes possible. Women feel their heart start to flutter, and wise men begin to act foolish. Up until today Matthew registered a zero on the gullibility scale, but now that he’s looked into Lindsay’s eyes he’s ready to be a believer. I can tell you what’s going to happen, but I won’t because it would only spoil the fun. Instead I’ll give you this small bit of wisdom: Every human should have a dog, because somewhere between the bark and the wag of a tail there’s a heart way bigger than your own. That’s where you’ll find the truth of what love is all about.

~

I watched as Lindsay arrived at the Kindness Animal Clinic. I knew exactly what she would do, and she didn’t disappoint me. She whizzed through the front door and went straight back to Matthew’s office.

“Is it okay if I put this poster on the reception room bulletin board?” she asked.

“Of course,” he answered. It was hard for him to hold back a smile, but he didn’t want to let her know that Eleanor had already told him about the dog. When he asked to see the poster I noticed how his hand lingered on Lindsay’s.

She noticed it too.

Once the poster was in his hands, Matthew could see this wasn’t just a sketch and it wasn’t a stock photo. It was a real dog, a specific dog. A dog he could easily imagine had something to say. He began to wonder if Eleanor had somehow left out a part of the story.

“Why are you looking for this particular dog?” he asked.

“I think this dog is looking for me.”

“Looking for you?”

“Yes. The first time I saw this dog it was on a rescue site and…” Lindsay told the story of how the picture of the dog kept popping up on her computer.

Matthew’s eyes were locked onto hers as she spoke. Her words held such passion, such conviction. He was a practical man and even though he had a great love of animals, he normally would have scoffed at the preposterous tale of a disappearing and reappearing dog, but oddly enough as Lindsay spoke he came to believe her story.

~

I told you, love makes believers of everyone. Yes, even me. With all the tragic love affairs I’ve witnessed, you might think by now I’d be disenchanted, but no. I’m the biggest believer of all.