Wishing for Wonderful (Serendipity #3)(27)
Her name and address were at the top of the page, but almost everything else was different. A double-ruled box bordered her name and address, and beneath the box was a long paragraph describing her capabilities. Included in the paragraph were words like “skilled communication professional,” “strong organizational abilities,” “excellent knowledge of…”
She continued to read. Her experience at the Big Book Barn had been moved up to just below that paragraph, and it included twelve lines of copy about her duties and responsibilities. Beneath that there was a full paragraph describing all the duties she’d had at Seaworthy. More words: “agenda coordination,” “document preparation.”
The large block of copy about her employment at Gift Industry News continued on a second page—“thorough knowledge of collectibles industry,” “editorial and proofreading supervision.” There was not a single mention of coffee-making. The lower portion of the page listed Lindsay’s activities in high school and college: “student council,” “chess club,” “editorial staff,” “cheerleading”…
“Wow,” Lindsay said and leaned back in the chair. None of the things listed were lies but where she’d been seeing herself as a deflated balloon, this resume was pumped full of helium. It was big, round, plump and ready to soar. She printed three copies, then dashed into the living room and threw both arms around her Dad.
“Thank you,” she said, “thank you, thank you, thank you!”
John looked at her with a puzzled expression. “For what?”
Lindsay knew it was so like her dad to shy away from taking credit even when he’d done something spectacular, and she laughed. “For fixing my resume.”
“I didn’t—”
“Oh, come on, I know—”
“No, Lindsay, I didn’t,” he said, and this time the deadpan expression on his face meant he was telling the truth. He turned to Eleanor. “You were on the computer a while ago, did you—”
The edge of a smile curled Eleanor’s lips ever so slightly. “It wasn’t me. I was looking up that recipe for crab cakes. I thought maybe I’d make them for dinner tomorrow.”
“Well, then who…”
Eleanor and John both shrugged, but hers was definitely a bit less emphatic.
Lindsay left the room scratching her head. Her father was telling the truth, she was certain of it. She’d had twenty-seven years of watching his expressions, and she knew every single one. Tonight his look hadn’t been one of false modesty; it was bewilderment. Yet Eleanor…
It made no sense. Eleanor wouldn’t have known those things about her high school years, she wouldn’t have known about the sorority, and yet…
“Impossible,” Lindsay muttered as she trotted up the staircase.
~
You think I changed that resume, right? Well, you’re wrong. Eleanor did it. I told you I wasn’t going to help Lindsay with her employment problem, and I didn’t. Okay, I gave Eleanor the idea and moved the resume to where she was sure to see it, but Eleanor was the one who pulled Lindsay’s yearbook from the shelf and gathered enough information to make it work.
The funny thing is that what Eleanor wrote wasn’t simply wishful thinking. Lindsay did all those things. Unfortunately, like many humans, the girl is so focused on what is missing from her life that she’s blind to what she has. That’s a major design flaw in humans but not one I can fix.
Life Management can be blamed for a good part of Lindsay’s problem. This lack of confidence started right after Bethany’s accident. John tried to make up for her loss, but males are extremely inept when it comes to mothering skills. They’re okay with handling a scraped knee or a broken arm but draw a complete blank when it comes to emotional needs. John is no exception. With humans the male and female units don’t just look different, they also have different operating systems. Males are designed for doing and fixing, females for feeling and sensing.
Here’s a perfect example. Two days ago Lindsay complained that the outfit she was wearing looked hideous. Instead of telling the girl she was beautiful in whatever she wore, John offered to buy her a new dress. See what I mean? She didn’t need a new outfit, what she needed was to know that somebody thought she was special. Eleanor tries, but Lindsay closes her ears to most of what the poor woman says.
I lost track centuries back of the number of successful matches I’ve made, but this I can tell you. None have been quite as complicated as this Eleanor-John match. Yeah, yeah, I know. You’re gonna bring up the Romeo-Juliet thing, aren’t you? Well, they weren’t in my jurisdiction, so I’m not accountable for that fiasco.
Cupid
The Distraction Attraction
The laughable thing about humans is their gullibility. Even when a human is down to their last dollar, they read a horoscope promising a large sum of money and expect it to be forthcoming. The realization that the horoscope has been written by another human with no more knowledge of the future than the reader never dawns on them. Little wonder my tricks work as well as they do. Lindsay is high on the gullibility scale, so she’s easier to maneuver than most. While this often works in my favor, I’m a bit concerned when it comes to her expectations about the new resume.