Where We Belong (A Touch of Fate #1)(47)

A couple of minutes pass and her shoulders stop shaking. She is still facing away from me, but I don't need to see to know that she is hurting. She takes a deep breath and raises her head. Her hands wipe furiously against her face and she slowly turns to look at me. When our eyes meet, all of her emotions resurface. Tears re-form and breach the confines of her lashes without notice. Her chin quivers and I know she's doing everything in her power to hold it in. "Come on, you need to take a minute." Placing my hand at the small of her back, I lead her into our break room and lock the door.

I reach for her arm and she doesn't resist. Pulling her to me, she buries her face in my chest and allows herself to lose control. "I lost her," she cries, her tears soaking through my shirt. Raising her head, she peers up, my scrubs bunched up in her fists. Her sad, bloodshot eyes stare back at me and my heart breaks. "She was a mother." Her last word cracks on another gentle sob and her head falls against my chest. "She had two kids, Ty. Two. They're five and seven, and now their mom is gone." I don't say anything because I'm really not sure what to say. I've lost kids, parents, grandparents...you name it and I've seen it. I know it’s hard but it's just something that you have to grieve and move past, or the 'what ifs' will eat at you and break you down.

"She'll never see them graduate high school or go on their first dates. She'll never see them kick the final goal to win a soccer game or go off to college." A strangled cry flies from her mouth and I pull her in tighter. "They're going to go through their whole lives without the one person who is supposed to be there to support them and protect them. Now who is going to do those things?" she asks, raising her grief-stricken face to mine.

"Their dad is going to do it." I normally would never presume that the kids have a dad or that he's actually capable of taking over, but I saw the family she is talking about in the waiting room and the guy looked like a stand-up guy. I understand that looks can be deceiving, but he looked devastated and I saw him holding his two boys tightly as they all prayed for the woman that they love with all their hearts.

"He is going to step in and fill those shoes as best he can. He is going to remind them of their mother every day, and he is going to love those boys with everything he has because they need him and that's what a dad does." At least that's what my dad would have done.

"Do you have kids?" she whispers into my shoulders.

"Nope. You?" I respond quietly, continuing with the slow circles my hand is making on her back.

"No. But someday..." She trails off, sniffing a few times, and after several more minutes, her shoulders stop shaking.

"Are you okay?" I pull back from her, gripping her shoulders in my hands. Her eyes are still sad, but her tears have dried. She tries for a genuine smile but fails miserably, and I chuckle lightly at her attempt.

"I will be. Thanks for that," she says, waving at my tear-soaked scrub top. Laughing, I wrap my arm around her shoulder and pull her into me.

"Yes. You will be. Look, I know that this is hard—losing anyone is hard—but you've got to allow yourself to move on. Not only for your own sanity, but because there are still patients sitting in those rooms," I say, pointing out to the hall, "that need you completely focused when you go in to take care of them."

Fuck. I probably sound like a cold bastard, but when you're around this type of thing every day, you learn to deal with it. It doesn't mean you forget about it, but you learn to live with it.

A genuine smile lights up her face. "Aren't you just the resident and I'm the Doc? I'm the one that supposed to be helping you deal with these things." Her voice is light and seems unaffected, but I can tell it bothers her that I saw her lose her shit like that.

"It doesn't matter, you needed to grieve and I was here. Maybe I'll let you buy me lunch for acting as your human tissue!" She slaps my chest playfully and moves to walk out. "Is that a yes?" I yell down the hall after her. She lifts her hand above her head, waving me off and I laugh quietly.



"NO, NO! I GOT it!" she says, pushing me aside to hand the cashier her employee card.

I attempt to block her, but she's a tough little thing. "Avery, I was joking. I don't expect you to pay for my lunch."

"Oh no! I'm not going to fall for that one. You'll hold that shit against me someday!" she says, pointing a celery stick at my face.

We opt to take our lunch back to the break room because Avery is still feeling a little raw over what happened this morning.

"So...do you want to talk about it?" I ask, popping a fry into my mouth.

She shakes her head firmly. "Nope. In fact, I'd very much like to talk about anything that doesn't have to do with healthcare. Hey," she says, smiling brightly and wiggling her eyebrows suggestively, "how are things going with that girl you care about?"

Well, shit! She doesn't want to talk about healthcare, and I don't want to talk about Harley. But I will because, f*ck me, I've got to tell someone, and I sure as shit can't tell Levi...he's just too close to her. It kills me to think about just how close they really were.

"We had drinks last night," I say, shoving my cheeseburger in my mouth.

"That's great." She smiles around her soda and I know she's being sincere. I can tell by the open admiration on her face that she genuinely wants me to be happy.