Where Silence Gathers (Some Quiet Place #2)(76)
The words are completely foreign, and Frustration and Impatience scowl with me. “So, every part of the brain,” I interrupt. “I get it. But if you knew the serum was so bad and kids were dying, why didn’t you do something?” My hands clench into fists and my knuckles dig into the tender parts of my legs. Resentment kneels by the bench and pats my knee. Any uncertainty about whether or not Andrew has the Sight dissolves; he doesn’t even blink when we’re surrounded.
“ … did, Alex,” he’s saying. “I couldn’t turn Felix in for the study—I’d been a part of it, and I was as guilty as him—but I tried to convince your dad to stop. When he wouldn’t listen, I talked to the kids, and some of them were willing to leave the study and go into hiding. It wasn’t until Travis Bardeen attacked Nora that Will finally saw what I’d been seeing for weeks, and he decided to stop taking the serum and no longer participate in the experiments. That same night, you had the accident.”
The accident. No, I can’t think about that. If I do, I won’t be able to deny that maybe—just maybe—Nate Foster isn’t entirely the one to blame for what happened that night. Nothing would have been set into motion if it weren’t for my Sight.
“Dad did all of it for me,” I whisper, remembering his words. This truth can’t be put into any wooden boxes. Andrew doesn’t confirm or deny it, which makes the realization worse, somehow.
Distantly I’m aware that Andrew is saying my name, prying, wanting to know more. One insight rises above the rest, soft and devastating: my father was out of control the night of the accident, and if it’s not Nate Foster’s fault, everything I’ve done is for nothing. An Emotion is leaning over me, and the only reason I know which one is because of the stench emanating from her. Guilt.
I need to change the subject. Have new thoughts. Ask any questions not about the accident. Shaking myself, I look at Andrew. “So, that day in your office, when you wanted us to go outside so badly … ?” I prompt, grasping for a topic we haven’t covered yet. And this is something that’s been plaguing me since he nearly assaulted me.
Now Andrew’s cheeks redden. Guilt and Shame saunter over to him, drape themselves on each side, and force me to scoot away. “Because of your dad’s warning, I knew Stern had bugged my office. I didn’t remove the device after I found it, though—I figured it was better to control what he knew. Keeping your enemy close and all that.” His countenance darkens.
There are more questions I want to ask, more things I need to know, but the sun is rising higher and higher and my last day shouldn’t be this. It should be more. So I stand up and look at my father’s best friend, thinking of Dad’s response to Frederick: the blood you inherit doesn’t make the man. Shrugging off an Emotion’s hand, I extend my own to Andrew. “Thank you for telling me all this. And … I’m sorry. For making such a mess out of everything.”
Startled, Andrew gets to his feet, too. Of course he fixes his rumpled shirt and slicks his hair back. Then he takes my hand and doesn’t let go. “It’s not safe for you to be alone,” he replies, disregarding the apology. “Stern knows you have the flash drive, and he knows that you’re Will’s daughter. That’s something your dad and I always kept from him. If he hasn’t come for you already, he will.”
Come for you. The Taurus trying to ram me off the road, the intruder in our apartment, the note under my pillow. I knew someone was trying to find the flash drive, but it had never occurred to me that I was a target, too. But Dr. Stern is short and pudgy, and fairly old. The man in the apartment was tall and gangly. Who …
Suddenly I make the connection. Of course.
Travis Bardeen.
How has it taken me so long to put it together? He’s been stalking me under Dr. Stern’s orders, even at school. From the sound of his history, Travis enjoys violence. A shudder wracks my body when I remember Nora Masterson’s face. That was his work, too. Good thing that after tonight, I won’t have to be afraid of him anymore. I won’t be afraid of anything.
“ … you hear me? I need you to promise me that you’ll be careful. Make sure you’re always with someone.”
I blink and the blurred world comes into focus. How long has Andrew been talking? He’s staring now, waiting for a promise. My conscious flicks at me, but what’s more empty words? “I promise,” I say, giving him a fake smile. “Call you later, okay? From our home number, since mine is sort of out of commission.”
Andrew finally releases his hold and murmurs a goodbye. Then he goes to his car, expecting a call that will never come. I watch him drive away and the dust fade. When I turn back to the stairs, I’m surprised to see Missy standing there. She’s picked up the phone from the ground. “Did you two get everything figured out?” she asks, brushing a strand of black-gray hair off her forehead with her free hand.
I start to answer, but the phone rings. Missy jumps. Then she presses TALK. “Hello?” Her brows rise and she holds it out to me a second time. “It’s for you again. Someone’s popular.”
Since she’s smiling at me and expecting a normal response, I do my best to mask my terror. It has to be Dr. Stern calling back. Be smart about this, my instincts urge. If he thinks you’re cooperating and still on his side, it’ll buy you some time. Once again, I take the phone from Missy and put it to my ear.