Vulnerable [Suncoast Society] (Suncoast Society #29)(60)

Jesse’s eyes were closed, but he wasn’t sleeping. “I’m so exhausted, honestly, I don’t think I could even muster the energy to feel much more than irritation at Hitler right now. Shoot.”

“I was really jealous of you when Leo first started dating you. Laurel didn’t just happen to call him on the off weekend, or at night, or whenever.”

He opened his eyes as he chuckled and kissed the top of her head. “I know. It’s okay.” He resisted the urge to add a playful snark about her being as hard to see through as a clean window, but knew it might come out wrong, so he left that alone.

“No, it’s not okay. I’m sorry. I know you love him and he loves you. I’m just trying to come to grips with the fact that someone loves him as much as I do. I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you. I hated this situation, but not you. I hope that makes sense.”

“It does. And it’s okay.”

“You’re a good man. I’m glad Laurel loves you, too. And thank you for loving her.”

“You’re a good woman. Don’t worry, we’ll find the right guy for you. I promise.”

“You can’t make me a promise like that.”

“Oh, don’t count on it. Our friends are matchmakers.” He belatedly realized his exhaustion had loosened his tongue a little.

Again.

“Is that how you guys met?”

“Yeah. Some of the very people here tonight. Including Tilly.”

She went quiet for a moment. “Can I admit something else while I’m confessing?”

“Sure.”

“I’m not proud of myself…but I snooped. One time when you guys were gone during the day and Laurel was in school, I went to the apartment and went through your stuff.”

Normally, he knew he would muster anger. Rage, even, at the violation of their privacy. Demand the return of the key—which wouldn’t matter because they’d need to get the lock changed anyway.

Not today. Not now.

All that didn’t mean jack shit when Leo was lying in a hospital bed with his future uncertain. It also sounded like she wasn’t quite through with her confessions.

Jesse let out a sigh. “And the point of admitting that was…what?”

“Can I ask something?”

“I’m exhausted, not dead, but I am hitting my limit. What is it?”

“Are you and Leo…kinky?”

There was no use denying it. “He’s my Master, and I’m his slave.”

It was several long moments before she responded. “Okay.”

He sat up and stared down at her. “Is that a problem? What we do, we keep it away from Laurel. We don’t ever get sexual or anything like that around her. Hell, usually when she’s with us, we don’t even have sex. We’re too afraid of her hearing anything. The worst she’s seen us do is kiss. That’s it, I swear.”

“No…I know. I didn’t mean it like that. So…Tilly…?”

“Tilly is a Domme, yes. Sort of. Mostly. Usually.”

“Those two men who brought her clothes earlier?”

“Landry’s her husband, and Cris is…Well, it’s complicated. They’re a poly triad. Cris is Landry’s slave and partner, and Tilly switches and sort of does her thing with both of them. She used to top me just as a friend before I met Leo.”

“Is she really a nurse?”

“Yes. Landry came into her life when he had cancer, and she took care of him during his treatments.”

“I promise I won’t snoop again but if you want to take away my key, I understand.”

“That’s the only skeleton in our closet.”

She snuggled against him. Despite her admissions, his perspective had been forcibly ratcheted into a different viewpoint and he couldn’t hate her for the privacy violation.

Because he knew Leo wouldn’t hate Eva. Leo would always frame his interactions with Eva in terms of his guilt over having to end their marriage.

And Jesse strongly suspected that guilt had something to do with whatever spurred the panicked desperation that had made Eva declare Jesse Laurel’s guardian.

He kept her tucked close against his side.

“I don’t suppose you’re into girls, are you?” she asked.

“Sorry.” He rested her head against hers. “We’ll find you a guy. We’ll sic Tilly on it.”

“Sic me on what?”

He’d been so tired that he’d missed her return from the bathroom. “Our secret’s out, sensei,” he said to her as she walked around the group of seats and back in front of them.

“Huh?”

He patted his throat, mimicking a collar and knowing Tilly would get it. “She knows. She asked, and I just told her.”

“Oh.” Tilly sat in a chair across from them. “Well, now.” She smiled, but he didn’t miss how exhausted it looked. “Ask now, or forever hold your peace.”

Eva’s voice sounded nothing like the woman he’d gotten to know—a little—over the past few months. She sounded defeated, shredded, lost. “When…when we get through all of this, can you play matchmaker for me, too?”

Tilly froze. Jesse was afraid she was going to blow up but then she threw her head back and laughed, clapping a hand over her mouth to stifle the sound so she didn’t awaken Laurel or get hauled out of there by the psychiatric department for observation.