Undeniable (Undeniable, #1)(15)
“Fuckin’ shit!” he yelled. “Goddammit, Eva! God motherf*ckin’ dammit!”
Oh my God, he was pulling out.
“No! Please! I want this!” I dug my nails into his back and tightened my legs around his waist. “I wanted it to be you! I’ve been dreaming about this! About you and me! Ever since you kissed me! Even before then!”
He sagged against me. “Fuck,” he whispered.
He was still inside of me, and I was so full of him. It felt so good, and when I tried to move—because I had to move, wanted, needed to move—he groaned. I liked hearing him groan almost as much as I liked the feel of him inside of me, and I wanted more. I wanted him to move. So I told him this, told him everything I was feeling, and everything more that I wanted to feel. It just kept pouring rapidly out of me, feelings and needs, because I needed him to know how much this meant to me, that it was him I wanted to take this from me, him I wanted to give it to. That it was only him I ever wanted inside of me and only him I ever want to be inside of me.
His eyes met mine, arctic blue and beautiful.
“Please,” I begged. “Deuce, please.”
“I’m f*ckin’ married, Eva. Got two kids. This is f*cked. It shouldn’t have been me.”
What? Here he was inside of me—because I wanted him inside of me, because he was the only man I have ever needed inside of me—and he had the nerve to tell me it shouldn’t have been him. After making me beg him?
“Fuck you!” I snapped. “I don’t give a shit about your wife and neither do you, or you wouldn’t have been finger-f*cking me in the club! And you definitely wouldn’t have carried me out here with every intention of f*cking me! You can’t tell me it shouldn’t have been you! You don’t get to make that decision. I do! I did, and it’s done! And I’m not giving it back!”
His eyes flashed with anger. “I can’t give you shit!” he hissed. “All I’ve got to give you is my f*ckin’ cock, and that’s not good enough! Not for you! Not even f*ckin’ close! You deserved better than this! Better than a f*ckin’ shit-filled alleyway and definitely better than me!”
There it was. The pain I glimpsed every time we crossed paths. The sadness that never seemed to leave him.
“You’re better than you think,” I whispered. “I didn’t realize it when I was little—didn’t understand that look in your eyes, why you always looked so sad—but I get it now. Someone got inside of you and messed you all up, made up down and left right, so now you think you’re shit when you’re not even close. So you need to listen to me when I tell you that you are better than you think. You’re even better than that. To me, you’re the best.”
His nostrils flared. “Eva,” he groaned.
“What?”
“Shut up.” His mouth met mine, and we kissed slowly, deeply, deliciously lazy.
“Gonna f*ck you now, baby,” he muttered into my mouth.
Oh. Good. So good.
“OK,” I breathed.
And he did. Up against a dirty brick wall, in a garbage-filled alleyway home to rats and feral cats, while warm summer rain poured down over us. And it was perfect. Better than I’d imagined. Better than anything. The best.
? ? ?
I spent the next four years in college, spent my days studying, shopping with Kami, trying to ditch Frankie, and enjoying my life. And I spent my nights reliving my moments with Deuce. All four of them.
The day after my graduation ceremony, I packed a backpack, grabbed Kami, wrote my father a note, and got on an airplane headed for Miles City, Montana.
Headed for Deuce.
CHAPTER FIVE
If I needed any more proof that the Hell’s Horsemen were into some seriously illegal shit—other than their alliance with my father—all I had to do was take one look at their clubhouse.
Smack dab in the middle of the Montana hills, down a barely there dirt road, enclosed with an electric fence topped with razor wire, sat their whitewashed warehouse, massive at around thirty thousand square feet, with their insignia painted huge on the front of the building. A line of Harleys was parked outside, along with some pickup trucks and a shiny red sports car.
I pulled our rental car up to the gate and peered into the camera. The intercom underneath crackled.
“Help you with somethin’, darlin’?”
I cleared my throat. I was so nervous.
“I…um…wanted to…um…”
“Smooth, Evie,” Kami whispered. “Really smooth.”
I glared at her.
“You here to party?” the intercom crackled.
“Uh,” I said and glanced at Kami. She bugged out her eyes. “Say yes, you idiot!”
“Uh, yes.”
The gate clicked and slowly swung open, and Kami started jumping around excitedly.
I was parking when two guys came running outside. Kami grinned.
“H-O-T,” she spelled out. “Me wanna lick.”
I gave a shaky laugh. My stomach was in knots. I hadn’t seen Deuce in four years—not since the night I gave him my virginity. I wasn’t sure how he was going to react to me just showing up.
A well-built, good-looking Latino guy with a shaved head, lots of body piercings, and tattoos as far as the eye could see grinned at us.