Twisted Together (Monsters in the Dark #3)(87)

“Now why would I do that?” He couldn’t wipe the damn smile off his face. “Struggling to come to terms with something, Tess?” Chuckling, he leaned over and cupped my cheek. “Perhaps you’re having second thoughts about falling in love with a man who just changed your perception on how you see the world.”

My belly fluttered. He’d already done that. He’d made me a lover of pain. He’d made me an accomplice in a charity I hadn’t known about until an hour ago. He’d turned my life completely inside out, back to front, bleached it, then cut it up and sewed it back together.

All while keeping something from me. The comment from Frederick, the tension echoing in Q’s limbs. No wonder he’d been cagey whenever I tried to watch TV or go online. He’d hidden all the news from me. He also downplayed just how dangerous it was to have people know the truth.

Foreboding sat like a heavy smudge on my heart.

This is too much! All of it. I needed to know the truth. How much jeopardy was he truly in? He needs to stop being so damn blasé.

“Can you be serious for one second?” I hadn’t been cross with him before but his smug grin really flipping annoyed me.

He laughed, throwing his head back, elongating his perfect neck. My mouth went drier than a desert.

Holy hell, how was I supposed to concentrate when everything about him exuded raw sex?

His gaze locked on mine. “What seems to be the problem?” Reeling off on his fingers, he said, “It can’t be the fact you’ll never go hungry, or cold, or homeless. It can’t be the fact you’ll always be safe and be able to afford the best protection and healthcare. And it certainly can’t be the fact that you can use that money to help others.” Rolling his eyes, he smirked again. “God, you’re acting like I made you sign a death sentence and not a life improving sentence.”

Swivelling in my chair, holding onto the cushioned arm rest as the plane banked suddenly, I said, “You don’t get it. You’re giving away half of the money that’s rightfully yours, and you’re treating it like it’s nothing.”

And hiding your safety from me.

His eyes flashed, losing his mirth, trading it for his well-known aggression. “?a y est tu peux passer au dessus.”It is. Get over it.

“No. Not until I’ve processed it. Don’t you understand I’d won the lottery by finding you? That all my wishes were granted when you fell in love with me? How can I justify being a billionaire in monetary worth, when I’m already beyond wealthy by having you?” My eyes burned as tears puddled from nowhere. Damn, I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want to appear weak. I didn’t know how to formulate my real concerns because I didn’t even understand them myself.

My real fear stemmed from Frederick’s veiled comment.

“They’ve saved your business but taken—” Taken what? How soon? I couldn’t stomach the thought of Q being hurt.

Q frowned; he lost the edge of anger, confusion filling his gaze. “Tess—it’s because of those reasons why I gave you the money. I’ve never trusted anyone to use my wealth in the same way I do. I never had the urge to share that responsibility. It’s because you love me that you’re perfect to accept the weight of the Mercer fortune.”

I looked out the window again, swallowing the lump that had the audacity to choke. I’m afraid I’m not worthy of all of this. I’m afraid life will expect me to pay another toll, and I’m terrified I won’t be able to afford it.

Q pulled his legs toward him, stretching to wrap a fist in my hair.

My heart flurried as he gently but firmly tilted my head to face him. “What’s this really about, esclave?” His eyes searched mine, and I knew he’d never understand. I’d agreed to marry him. By that alone, I would’ve spent my life surrounded by wealth because I would spend it surrounded by Q. It made no difference.

But my real terror was the prick of instincts honing in on things Q kept hidden.

Oxygen caught in my lungs. I’d been planning a lifetime together, so why did I suddenly have the horrible notion Q planned for much less?

Q’s face was cast with shadows as the plane pierced clouds, blocking out the view of the disappearing French countryside. “Peu importe ce qu’il y a tu peux me le dire.” Whatever it is, you can tell me.

I shook my head, swallowing my tumultuous concerns. He didn’t need to know I guessed something was amiss—not until I had concrete evidence and could demand an answer.

Resting my palm on his warm thigh, I said, “It’s fine. I’ll be fine. Thank you. Thank you for trusting me with everything that you are.” And stupidly planning for things I won’t let come to pass.

Q’s jaw clenched and for a moment I worried he wouldn’t let me hide the truth, but then his hand dropped from my hair, brushing against the ‘Q’ branded into my neck. The skin was no longer painfully sensitive; I shivered at the soft caress.

“You still don’t get it.” He shook his head, eyes alive with vitality and connection. Bowing his head, he brushed his lips against mine. “You may have become richer in bank balance—but Tess…you made me richer in my heart. And that’s f*cking priceless.”

My body gave way from substance to molten, and I arched my chin to kiss him. I wanted to shed my skin and fly. I wanted to free my soul, so Q could see just how much I loved him. My note wasn’t enough to describe how much he’d changed my life. He was more than healing acid—he was my blood. We shared the same heartbeat and if he died I had no doubt my life would cease, too.