Tone Deaf(23)

Arrow shakes his head and laces his fingers behind his head, like he’s trying to keep it from exploding. “But . . . she’s deaf.”

“I know.”

“You publicly gave her the finger. No, two fingers.”

“I know.”

“And now she’s suddenly tagging along? All the way to New York?”

“I already told you. Yes, she’s coming. And, no, you’re not going to change my mind.”

Arrow pinches the bridge of his nose, as if he thinks he can physically hold back a headache. “This is a bad idea, Jace. No, a terrible one. Inviting an underage girl to travel along with us? Hell, are you trying to get arrested?”

“It’s not like anything is going to happen between us. This is about helping her and nothing else. She’s in trouble.”

Arrow groans. “What, did you knock her up or something?”

“Of course not,” I snap.

Arrow gives me a disbelieving look and crosses his arms over his chest. Great. Every second I stay silent, his suspicions are just going to get bigger. I shake my head and quietly say, “She’s being abused. Honestly, I don’t know much about it, but she’s got bruises all over. That’s why I offered to help her get away.”

“How old is she exactly?” Arrow demands, although he speaks slower, like he’s finally starting to consider what I’m saying.

“Seventeen.”

“Then she shouldn’t have any trouble getting away on her own.”

“She says her dad’s a police chief. According to her, he won’t just let her escape.”

Arrow throws his hands up in the air. “Are you hearing yourself? ‘She says.’ ‘According to her.’ How do you know this girl isn’t just some rabid fan who’s lying to you?”

I cross my own arms over my chest, mimicking Arrow’s defensive position. “Well, for one, she’s deaf.”

“We have deaf fans.”

“Seriously? Rabid deaf fans?”

Arrow looks away and mutters something, but doesn’t bother with a real argument. An awkward silence passes, filled only with both of our heavy breaths and Killer’s quiet snores. Then I hesitantly say, “It’s just a couple months, Arrow.”

Arrow scoffs. “Jace, thousands of girls attend our concerts every year, and I’m sure lots of them have abusive boyfriends or families. What makes this one girl so special?”

“Because she . . .”

I trail off, not wanting to say what’s on the tip of my tongue: Because she looks like me. That look in her eyes, of fear and anger and self-loathing, is the same one I see every time I glance in the mirror. Well, the same one I used to see. All that’s there now is the blank stare I’ve mastered over the years. But Ali hasn’t mastered that expression, because she hasn’t escaped yet.

Because I haven’t helped yet.

Arrow raises an eyebrow at me. “What? Because she what?”

“Because I know she’s in trouble,” I snap. “I know that look. You know that look.”

He flinches. I do, too. We avoid each other’s eyes for a long moment, as if we’re both afraid we’ll see the past reflected there.

“Fine,” Arrow finally says, his words emerging slowly. “The deaf girl can come.”

“Her name is Ali,” I correct. I don’t like how all my bandmates have taken to calling her “the deaf girl,” especially since I think they picked up the habit from me. But I was wrong to ever call her that. She’s more than just a girl, more than a deaf person. She’s a person with a name, someone who lives and breathes and . . . feels.

“Whatever. Ali can come.” Arrow points an accusing finger at me. “But if she messes things up, I’m blaming you. We’ll all blame you.”

“I’ll take full responsibility,” I say.

“Good.” Then Arrow frowns. “We’re leaving in just a couple hours. When’s she going to join us?”

“She’s meeting me at ten. But as far as anyone else knows, she’s not going to be here at all. This is between you and me and the band. No one else can know.”

Arrow stares at me blankly for a long moment. Then he shakes his head and says, “She’s in deep shit, isn’t she? I mean, it’s not like we’ve never broken the law before, but this is . . . different.”

“Yeah, I know. But she needs help, and I’m not just going to ditch her.”

Arrow nods slowly and chews at his lip, considering this. Then he asks, “Does Tony know about this?”

“Tony would never let her come. He’d be too worried it would cause a publicity scandal.”

“So then he doesn’t know.”

“No.”

Arrow stands up and gently clasps his hand on my shoulder. I flinch at the unwelcome warmth of his hand, but for once, I don’t pull back.

“You realize Tony would be right, don’t you?” Arrow says. “If someone figures out you’re hiding away an underage girl in your RV, it’ll cause a scandal for sure. The media isn’t going to care that you’re barely a year older than her. They’ll label you as an adult and her as a little girl, and your reputation will be ruined.”

“I know.”