Time Will Tell (Maybe #3)(16)

“Who’s looking after the business then?”

“My friend Dash is keeping an eye on things for me,” Xander replies. “I have good people that work there, I trust them. They’ve been working for my dad for a long time. My sister, Summer, pops in from time to time as well.”

“Sounds nice.”

“It is. Hasn’t been the same since Dad left though, which is why I wanted to get away. And I’m glad I did.”

I hear the sadness in his voice and it makes my own heart hurt. For him and for myself because I still miss my own dad every day. I also don’t miss that he said his dad left, instead of passed.

Was he in denial?

“Is it true what they say?” he suddenly asks.

“Is what true?”

“Does time heal?”

I know what he’s asking. He wants to know if, as time passes, will the pain of losing someone he loved disappear.

“I guess, in a way, you learn to deal with the pain. It does lessen as you accept things. So time does heal all wounds, just not completely. Nothing can do that. You learn to live with the scars and soon forget they’re there, but they never disappear completely.”

He nods like I’ve confirmed something he already knows. “Dad loved Channon. It feels nice being here. A change, you know?”

“It’s a peaceful place,” I say. “For the most part, you know, besides being the home of a badass motorcycle club.”

Xander grins. “You’re f*ckin’ cute, do you know that?”

His hair is tied back in a bun today and I can’t help but find it extremely sexy. My gaze wanders down his arms, his tattoos, and huge, strong hands.

“Do you like what you see?” he asks quietly, not in a cocky tone, but a serious one. Does he really want to know if I find him attractive? I don’t think there’s a woman alive that wouldn’t.

“I do,” I admit, my cheeks feeling flushed. I look down, a little shy. “You know I do.”

He slides over, closing the space between us and lifts my face up to meet his with his finger under my chin. “How do I know that you do?”

I decide to be honest with him and talk about the big elephant in the room. “When I saw you at the bar, I thought you were the most handsome man I’d ever seen in my life, but you didn’t want me, did you? You left with someone else, but that’s okay. I mean, we can be friends. I like hanging around you.”

He curses, then lowers his lips to mine and kisses me, sucking on my lower lip, and then drawing it into his mouth. His tongue slides into my mouth, tentatively at first, then more demanding. His hands cup my face while mine rest on his rock hard chest, clutching his shirt. I don’t think about anything except what I’m feeling, the taste and smell of him.

He is such a good kisser.

He pulls away before I’m ready and I moan in protest.

He gazes into my eyes. “Listen to me, Trill. I’ve never seen a woman as beautiful as you. Never. And you’re so f*ckin’ sweet you could make a man lose himself. Leaving with someone else was f*ckin’ stupid, but I did it because I thought I couldn’t have you.”

I blink a few times, still feeling dazed by his kisses.

“I f*cked up, Trill,” he says when I stay silent, still trying to make sense of everything.

“What am I doing?” I ask as my heart races.

What the f*ck am I doing? Can I just have a one-night stand with him? I’ve never had one before, and I’m not sure I can without getting hurt in the end. I don’t feel good about even considering this when he was with another woman just last night. Apparently, when it comes to Xander, I have no shame or dignity.

“Trillian—”

“Last night, your mouth was on someone else, and now I’m letting you kiss me and enjoying it. What the hell does that say about me?”

Without warning, Xander lifts me up and puts me on his lap. I can feel his hardness pressing against me, but he doesn’t say anything and neither do I. I’m too upset and confused to feel anything else.

“Now are you going to listen to me?” he asks, his tone laced with steel.

I nod.

I’m going to listen, but I also know I’m not going to like what he has to say.





Chapter Eight


Xander


How does a man say sorry to a woman he wants because he was between another woman’s thighs just the night before? There isn’t any way around this. I f*cked up big time and nothing I say will fix it.

What changed between last night and tonight? Last night, Trillian was just a beautiful woman I was drawn to and someone I thought was off limits. Tonight, Trillian is someone I can see myself with for a lot more than a simple f*ck. I like being around her and I want to get to know her better. I want to know everything about her. Trillian is angry with herself because she allowed herself to kiss me when I, like a stupid shit, was with someone else last night. If only I had just kept it in my pants. Fuck. I don’t know how to solve this, but there is one thing I can do to buy me some time and keep her around me.

So I do it.

“I’m going to be straight with you. I wanted you, I thought I couldn’t have you, so I played it off and left with someone else. Yes, I f*cked her, but it didn’t mean anything, it was just sex. I felt like shit afterward, even though I shouldn’t have because we’d only met once and that was it. But it was you I wanted, not her or anyone else.”