Things Liars Say (#ThreeLittleLies #1)(20)

Cal: Which part? The sexy part or the bitch part?

Grey: You are getting sexier and sexier by the day. Sorry, but it’s true. Time to accept the facts.





To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Warning! Warning!

Grey. As I suspected, my mom drove us nuts over the weekend with her demands. The woman is obsessed with mulching. And, as I predicted, Tabby picked a fight and Mom kicked her out of the yard. The brat winked at me as she fake stormed off. I can’t freaking believe my mom still falls for that bullshit. The good news is, all I had to do was drive the bobcat while my dad raked leaves into the shovel. What can I say about Sunday? For starters, my damn sister tricked me into telling her about you. I don’t know how she figured it out, but I must have been checking my phone about a hundred times—just in case you decided to send a message—and she caught me. When she tried stealing my phone and I pitched a bitch fit instead of letting her take it, she knew there was shit on here I didn’t want her to see. Boy, was she a pain in my ass. The entire day she tried to steal my phone. Wanting to see pictures of you. Asking a shit ton of annoying questions. If you get a friend request from Tabitha Thompson, would you do me a huge favor and DELETE IT?

What did you do this weekend? - Cal





To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: I consider creeping research.

Calvin,

In fact, I DID get a friend request from a Tabitha Thompson! LOL. No worries, I haven’t decided what to do about it yet. I did sneak onto her page, though. She looks awesome. Very beautiful. My objective, of course, was to find pictures of you. Très stalkerish of me, wouldn’t you say? Whatever. I got all giddy and girly over a few—the one of you in a tux for your senior prom? OMG. So handsome. And the one of you with your childhood dog? Must say, Calvin, I have something of a crush on you. I can admit that, right, now that we’re pen pals? Grey





To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Creeping, lurking = Same thing

Grey. Not surprised that you were lurking on my sister’s pics. That picture of me with the dog? Brownie, his name was—he was the shit. Cried like a baby when my parents put him to sleep. I don’t even want to know if you saw the picture of me snuggling Sparkles, the kitty cat I had when I was 3. Tabby posted that one last year for my birthday, that rude bitch. Shit. That was a joke. I would never call her that to her face; she’d scratch my eyes out. My sister, not the cat. – Cal





Cal: By the way, I’ve decided I will allow you to have a crush on me.

Grey: How magnanimous of you.

Cal: You’re welcome.

Grey: You ass.

Cal: Speaking of asses, yours is incredible.

Grey: Well, aren’t you just full of compliments today! I’ve got one for you: I could stare at your firm, tight ass in those rugby spandex all day long.

Cal: Holy shit, that is NOT what I was expecting you to say.

Grey: Why?

Cal: Because you’re classy.

Grey: Maybe, but I also have eyes. And hormones. I can’t say you have a firm, tight ass? Okay, fine. Can we at least talk about your buff arms? DROOL.

Cal: NO! Maybe. Okay, fine.

Grey: pouting I want to talk about your tattoos.

Cal: Thank god you’re an hour away, because I can’t spend the whole night jerking off— Cal: Shit, I did NOT mean to send that.

Cal: Ugh. It didn’t even make any sense.

Cal: Greyson, f*cking say something!

Grey: Shush. Shhhh. Shhh. I’m not done visualizing you doing naughty, naughty things to yourself closes eyes Also, why did you TYPE it if you didn’t mean to send it? WHAT THE HELL?? LOLOLOL

Grey: The WHOLE night jerking off? Wow. That’s some stamina you must have…

Cal: Oh my god. This is my worst nightmare Grey: ^^^ you sound like such a girl.

Cal: Wait. Did you just screenshot that shit????

Grey: No. Maybe. Okay, fine. Yes.





Cal: What are you up to right now?

Grey: I’m about to walk into work. But instead I’m sitting here in a chair by the door like a creeper, texting you.

Cal: Sorry.

Grey: Don’t APOLOGIZE. Sheesh, Calvin. How could you have known I was at work? Besides, it’s my choice. I’d rather sit and talk to you any day of the week. I work until 10 tonight, which—yuck.

Cal: That’s a long shift.

Grey: Yeah, but it’s the only day I work this week. I’m really grateful they’re so flexible. Confession? I think the manager has a crush on me or something. It’s kind of embarrassing, but it also works in my favor.

Cal: I don’t blame the guy. Wait. It is a GUY, right?

Grey: rolling my eyesgiggle* Yeah, it’s a guy. Not nearly as sexy as you ;) Cal: You did NOT just say that.

Grey: Oh boy, here we go again…





Greyson





The espresso machine hisses, and I pour cold, clear water into the top of the machine's water chamber, checking quickly to make sure the boiler cap is secured. My co-worker Rebecca tosses me the filter holder that I’d forgotten to grab when I started to fill the machine with grounds, and I call out a hasty “Thanks” as I lightly brush the coffee debris off the counter that escaped when I changed it earlier.