The You I've Never Known(86)



Return him to Max, who has a sorrel filly ready to ride.

We work like this for two-plus hours, and this time when I return the young

stallion, Hillary’s waiting to talk with me. “Okay to take a short break?” I ask Max.

He grins. If my boss there says so, and I imagine she does.





I Hand Over the Reins


And go to join Hillary,

who’s sitting on a soft bale of straw. She takes a good, long look at my face, winces.

Gabe told me what happened.

I’m so, so sorry, Ariel. Oh, by the way, he’s meeting the tow truck at your car. As long as it’s okay to drive, they’ll drop it off here for you.

A sudden thought crosses

my mind. “How much do you

think it will be? I don’t have any money to speak of, and—”

Don’t worry. I’ll cover it.

You can pay me back whenever.

In fact, if you need a few dollars to hold you over till you get paid, I’m happy to loan it to you.

“Wow, Hillary, that’s really nice. I’ll let you know if I do.”

Okay. But, listen. I . . . uh . . . wanted to talk to you about Gabe and me.

I know you two had a thing, and since I’ll be seeing a lot of you here with the horses— “Hey. Don’t worry. I’m cool with it. Gabe and I are just friends, okay?” I don’t feel the need to confess anything about special privileges,

even though her expression

tells me she definitely knows.

That’s what Gabe said, but I wanted to hear it from you.

He also mentioned your mom showing up after the game.

That must have been a shock.

“Hillary, that is a major

understatement. I truly

believed I’d never see

my mother again, and

honestly, I never wanted

to. I’m still not sure I do.

The only thing I feel

for her is resentment.”

Even as the words leave

my mouth, I hear how

cold they must sound

to an outsider. Will I

ever thaw all the way out?





Hillary Nods Understanding


But now she says simply,

I’d give anything for a little more time with my mom.

She doesn’t add the part

about that being impossible,

but she doesn’t have to.

I get what she’s trying to tell

me. “I know, and I wish it were

in my power to give that to you.”

Instead, I’ll just give her my

not-quite-a-boyfriend. “As far

as my mother, we’re supposed

to meet next Saturday after

I finish up here. I’ve got a week to figure out what to say.”

Another curt nod, and like

the last, it means she wants

to offer unsolicited advice.

Maybe you should just listen and decide how to respond after that. Not that you asked.

“I don’t mind. You happen to be

right. Meanwhile, better get back to work. I need to earn my pay.”

Two more things. We’re having a holiday party next Saturday night. Aunt Peg’s planning it, so it should be amazing. Lots of food and a band from Sac. I’d love for you to come, and you’re welcome to bring a date—or your mom— if you’d like. Second, I’m aware you might need a place to stay for a while. We’ve got lots of spare rooms if it comes to that. I’m serious.

At least till you figure things out.

First her car, and now this?

“For real? Wow, Hillary,

that’s incredibly generous.

I don’t know what I’m going

to do yet, but my options

are limited. I’ll keep it in mind.”

Please do. You don’t have to carry this alone. One last thing.

There’s strength in forgiveness.





I Would Never Have Believed


I could like Hillary Grantham.

But she really is a decent human being. I’m glad she and Gabe hit it off. They deserve each other.

I go back to riding and she goes back to whatever it is she’s got planned for the day after taking the time to try and improve mine.

By the time I finish, my rear

end’s sore, but my brain

is functioning on a higher level, and that’s a good thing because now I’ve got to go and see what remains of the place I’ve called home for the last eighteen months.

The Focus is parked just outside the barn, with a note on it saying it’s okay to drive, despite a few scratches on the driver’s side.

Just as I’m about to leave, Peg arrives on scene, waves me over.

Oh my God. What did I do now?

And why is this the first

thought to pop into my head?

But she is kind. Hillary confided what’s going on with you.

I just wanted to affirm her offer of a place to stay with us here.

Too kind. “Thank you. I really appreciate it. I’ll have a few days to work out if that’s

something I’ll need.”

Wonder exactly how much

they know. What did Gabe tell

Hillary, and what information

did she pass on to her aunt?

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