The Vargas Cartel Trilogy (Vargas Cartel #1-3)(53)
“I wanted to say goodbye,” I said when he surfaced again only inches from me.
“You need to go.”
I ignored him. “You haven’t said one thing to me in five days.”
“That’s by design.” He sidestepped me, moving toward the steps exiting the pool.
“Stop.” I wrapped my hands around his biceps, refusing to let him walk away from me again, refusing to let him do anything but look me in the eye and talk to me. “Why won’t you talk to me?” He kept his head turned, not meeting my gaze. “You can’t even look at me.”
The awkwardness between us was palpable, and I hated it. For some reason, I had deluded myself into believing he cared about me. I shouldn’t have tried to talk to him. I should’ve stayed in my room and waited for my last hours in captivity to expire. I had read too much into the time we spent together, which was ridiculous on my part, given the circumstances of how we met.
I shifted nervously from one foot to the other waiting for him to say something…anything.
“Hattie,” he said, his gray eyes finally locking on mine. “Why’d you come?”
“You’re right, I should go. This was a dumb idea. I don’t know what I was thinking. If you wanted to talk to me, you had many opportunities to do so. I’m forcing you—”
“Shut up, Hattie.” He pressed a finger to my mouth holding it there. “I don’t know what you’re thinking.”
“That I should’ve stayed in my room. That I don’t belong here.”
“Neither do I.” He dropped his hands to my shoulders, and he had this lost look on his face. My heart twisted. “I’ve never felt comfortable here. I hated the summers I spent in this house. I hated my dad’s life, and I hated Rever. We were close in age, but we were never friends…more like polite enemies with an unspoken agreement to tolerate each other.”
His eyes looked translucent in the moonlight. I couldn’t tear my gaze from his face, and he didn’t look away either. My body soaked up the attention. Physical awareness zipped between us like a live wire, and a warm glow shimmered through my nerve endings. Instantly, I tamped it down, doing everything to stop it. I couldn’t go there again…for so many glaringly obvious reasons, not the least of which was my dignity.
I took a small step back, but he moved forward, and before I knew it he had me pressed against the wall, his legs tangling with mine beneath the waist-deep water. His arms circled my waist, shackling me against his chest. My insides jolted the minute our bodies made contact, and with that small touch I was already aroused, my body wanting his. My breasts ached. Liquid desire pooled between my thighs, and my heart raced frantically inside my chest, echoing wildly in my ears.
I buried my face in the crook of his neck, unable to look at him for one more second. I had wanted him, craved him, for the last five days, and now that his arms were around me, I was scared. “I’m going to leave,” I murmured against the side of his neck. “I just wanted to say goodbye, and now I did.” I took a deep breath, drawing his now familiar scent into my lungs for the last time. Then, I wedged my hands between our slick bodies, pushing him away from me forever.
Binding my wrists with one hand, he lifted my chin, forcing me to look at him. Really look at him. What I saw robbed me of thought and buckled my knees. It was too much. I squeezed my eyes closed. “No. You should stay.” He brushed a kiss across my lips, my forehead and my eyelids. With four sultry caresses, he tore down all my walls, crumbling any lingering resistance. “Don’t you want me?” He nuzzled my ear and tremors danced down my spine, setting me ablaze. “Isn’t that why you’re here?”
Want him? I had never wanted anyone as much as I wanted him, and not just in the physical sense. How could he think otherwise? Panic warred with desire at that realization, and I froze. I didn’t know what to do. How did I move forward?
Then he kissed me—fully, deeply, desperately. I was cast adrift, senseless to anything around me but the push and pull of his mouth and the delicious swirl of his tongue as it chased mine in a circle of lust. If I didn’t know everything between us ended tonight, I would’ve have wept from the beauty of the moment.
I slipped my legs around his waist, locking my ankles behind his back, whimpering as my core collided with the hardness of his erection. His hands cupped my breasts over the small triangles of my swimming suit. I arched, inviting him to do more.
Not waiting a second, he unknotted the ties holding the back of my top together and slipped it over my head. He tossed it on the side of the pool and then his hands were back on my breasts, roughly toying with my nipples until I was breathless and aching with the pain of emptiness.
“Ryker,” I moaned, recklessly grinding my pelvis against his, against the thickness of his erection beneath his swim trunks.
He pulled the tie on one side of my bikini bottom and then the other, and they floated away from my body. His finger slipped inside of me, moving with wicked intent, in and out and back again. We were on a rollercoaster of desire and everything was moving too fast for my mind to process it.
“I missed this. I missed you,” he whispered, nipping the delicate edge of my earlobe. His confession spiraled through me, and my heart skipped a beat, even though I knew I should ignore his words. Pretend I didn’t hear them. Pray I unheard them. It’s only tonight, I reminded myself. Wanting more, claiming this meant anything, was insane. It would destroy me. Destroy my life. Destroy me for anyone else.