The Vargas Cartel Trilogy (Vargas Cartel #1-3)(47)

This was my new reality. For better or worse, my fate was intertwined with Rever’s, a man I didn’t know—a man who had lost his battle with the Vargas Cartel too.

Sunlight streamed into the car through the open door, replacing the cool air with the sticky humidity I’d become accustom to over the past two weeks. Conversations in Spanish hummed outside my door, but I didn’t care what was being said. For the first time since Ryker had taken me, I didn’t even try to pick out words I recognized.

Was I really supposed to receive my graduate degree in two months? Did I really secure that internship at the International Foreign Policy Council? Did I really think I could slip back into my old relationship with Evan like nothing had happened?

In one impulsive second, I tossed it all away. And for what? A flash in time with Ryker—a man who offered nothing. Promised nothing. A million explanations filtered through my mind that I could offer the authorities to justify the images on the screen.

That I suffered from Stockholm syndrome.

That someone held a gun to my head.

That I had been drugged.

But I’d know the truth. It haunted me. It tortured me. I was addicted to Ryker. I would never say no to him. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not three years from now. I wanted him, even though I knew wanting him was wrong.

I couldn’t help it.

I couldn’t stop it.

I didn’t want to.

Yes, Ryker knew about the cameras. Yes, I’m sure he realized we were being recorded. Yes, that was probably part of his plan. And yes, the video threatened my ability to recapture my future…a future I didn’t even know if I wanted anymore. None of it seemed as real as what I felt for a man I loved to hate and hated that I loved. It was a demoralizing, gut-churning conclusion that had me curling into my seat of the car.

No, not my seat.

Ignacio’s seat.

Ignacio’s car.

Ignacio’s driveway.

Ignacio’s house.

Ignacio’s video.

I was surviving on the charity of a man known for his cruelty, a man who had just threatened to destroy me.

I had officially hit the bottom. My life was broken. I was broken. Every f*cking thing was broken. Shattered. Destroyed. I couldn’t even pretend otherwise.





Chapter Twenty-Two




“Do you want to go inside or do you plan to sleep in the car?” Ryker asked leaning inside the backseat of the car, his hands braced against the doorjamb.

“Did you know?” I asked, my mind still reeling with the implications of the conversation with Ignacio. I didn’t know how long I’d sat, unmoving in the backseat of the car with the door still open. When I scanned the exterior of the villa, I noticed that everyone had long since gone inside.

He cocked his head to the side, and his eyes drifted over me. Undoubtedly, I looked like a wreck. I felt like one, both mentally and physically.

“About what?” he asked.

My eyes fell to my lap, and I ran my finger along the frayed hem of my too long t-shirt. “About the video?”

“The video conference with your father scheduled for tomorrow morning? Is that what you’re talking about?”

My eyes flickered to his as I chewed on my lower lip, rolling it between my teeth. “No.” I cleared my throat, piecing together the courage to ask the next question. “The one of us together in your bathroom.” Waiting in frozen silence, I momentarily stopped breathing.

His eyes widened. “Fuck.” He slammed his hand against the outside of the car. The hollow metal sound echoed through my ears. “Fuck,” he said again, as he pushed away from the door and took a few steps back, his body rigid, his nose flared. “I knew there was a camera in the bathroom. There are cameras everywhere. Ignacio records everything…everyone.”

“Is that why you…you…” I scrubbed my hands over my face. “It that why you were with me? So you could blackmail me later?”

Ryker shook his head. “No.”

I scooted toward the opening, dangling my legs out the side of the car. “Then why?”

He stalked toward me and dropped his hands on my thighs. A spark of anger mixed with arousal ignited under his hands and I shivered one long, traitorous shiver that traveled the length of my spine.

“Tell me,” I whispered, swallowing over the growing lump in my throat. “I need to know, because Ignacio said—”

Shadows flashed through his silvery gray eyes. He covered his hand over my mouth, interrupting me. “I did it because I wanted you, but we can’t go there anymore, Hattie. I already told you it was over. We made a mistake. I planned to erase the video the night you left. I was waiting for Ignacio to go to sleep, but I didn’t do it because you ran before I had the opportunity.”

My breath whooshed out of my chest and I swayed toward him, bringing my lips only inches from his. I knew I couldn’t kiss him or touch him ever again, so I closed my eyes for a split second as I shook my head. “Ignacio plans to use the video against me. He’s going to ruin me, my life…everything.”

“No, he won’t.” His fingers dug into my thighs.

“How do you know?”

“Because I won’t let him.” He withdrew one of his hands from my legs and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Can you control him?” Stupid question—I know. Of course he didn’t have any leverage to control Ignacio. Ignacio was his boss of sorts. His f*cking father. Still, my eyes searched his, silently begging him to contradict me.