The Story of Me (Carnage #2)(74)

“Wake up, Kitten. We’re here and we need to move. The press were here earlier, but Benny managed to get rid of them, but there might still be a couple hanging about.”

“What?” I ask as I try and process everything he’s just told me. “Benny still works for you?” is all that I manage and he smiles at me for some reason.

“You remember Benny?”

I nod. “Of course I remember Benny.” He looks at me for a long moment.

“Stay put until I come around and open your door. I just wanna check there’s none of the f*ckers still lurking about.” I smile at him and his protectiveness.

“Go get the f*ckers, Tiger.” He raises his eyebrows and I know he’s about to say something about me swearing when we are both startled by a commotion outside. We’re in an underground car park of some kind. It’s fairly well lit and I can see who I think is Benny and two other men trying to stop a photographer from getting any closer to Cam’s car.

“Fuck,” Cam says as he climbs out. He comes around to my side and helps me out. I pull the hood of my tracksuit jacket up and keep my head down as he walks me to the elevator. He swipes a card and the door opens instantly. We step in. He enters a number into the keypad and we shoot up. The speed makes my stomach churn, and I wonder for a moment if I’m going to be sick. We stop abruptly and I feel myself sway. “Fuck,” is all I hear from Cam as everything goes fuzzy. I feel him lift me up and walk with me. After a few seconds, he sits down still holding me. I don’t pass out. I just feel light headed and my legs and arms feel like jelly. I open my eyes and he’s looking down at me. My belly gives the loudest rumble and I raise my eyebrows and bite my lip as I try not to smile at the gurgling sounds coming from inside me.

“Kitten, when the f*ck was the last time you ate?” Oh, shit.

“I had a cup of tea and some chocolate biscuits at my mum’s earlier.” Hopeful that he’ll consider biscuits food.

“And before that?”

I shrug. “A bag of nuts and some Pringles on the plane.”

He shakes his head. “Real food, Georgia, when was the last time you ate anything containing any kind of nutritional value?” I close my eyes and pretend I can’t hear or see him.

“Stop talking about food. You’re making me feel sick.”

“You’ve not f*cking eaten since Saturday night, have you?” I ignore him. “For f*ck’s sake, Georgia, that was over two days ago. You can’t not eat for two f*cking days. That’s just ridiculous. You’ll f*cking die. You’ll starve to f*cking death.”

I open my eyes and look at him. “Will you please stop swearing. You’re giving my arse a headache.”

He stutters for a few seconds, not sure what to come back with. “How can your arse get a headache?”

“Easy, it just has to listen to you keep moaning.”

He shakes his head at me. “I’m gonna order some food. What d’ya fancy?”

“You,” I reply, and I instantly feel his cock twitch underneath me. My insides squirm and I feel my cheeks burn. He closes his eyes and drops his forehead down to rest on mine. “Kitten,” he whispers, “we need to talk before we even think about going there.” I feel a sharp stab of pain in my chest at his rejection. That bitch Karma got me again.

“Okay, well, let’s order food. Then we can talk. Then we can have lots and lots of sex.” He stares at me. He doesn’t smile. He doesn’t do his usual headshake. He just stares. “What are you thinking?” I ask him quietly,

“That I wish things were different.”

My eyes sting with tears and I don’t really know why. I try not to let my bottom lip tremble as I ask, “Different how?”

He shrugs. “The timing always seems to be wrong for us, George.” The words instantly remind me of Dire Straits’ “Romeo and Juliet”. That was mine and Sean’s song. We made it part of our wedding vows. It was a part of us, who we were, and here I am with Cam and he’s just accidently quoted a line from it, and now I’m totally confused about my feelings. A big fat tear plops onto my cheek.

“Is loving each other gonna be enough, d’ya think, Kitten? It wasn’t before.”

I let my tears fall as I try to be as honest with him as possible. “I didn’t know that I loved you before.”

“And what makes you so sure now. How d’ya know you’re not just settling for second best?”

I shake my head. “It’s not like that, Cam, and it’s never been like that. I was so blinkered back then. I’m a different person now.” I watch as he bites down on the inside of his lip.

“I wish I could be sure. If I take a chance and I’m wrong, it’ll kill me, Kitten. It’ll f*cking kill me.”

I shake my head and sob as I say to him, “I’ll prove it to you if you want me. I’m yours but you have to let go of the past and accept me with all of my faults.”

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Then you have to let me go.”

“I can’t. I’ve tried for over twelve years. I’ve never come close, not even for a day, not since the very first night I set eyes on you.”

“Then what do we do?”

“We fight. We give it everything and we try and make this work.” He’s moved his head back so he can see me.