The Seduction of Sebastian St. James (House of Renwick #2)(44)

Briefly Rawlings made eye contact and winked.

Emma was surely dancing with the devil.

The longest dance of Sebastian’s life finally ended and Emma was returned. Positively invigorated, or so it seemed. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes brilliant. It was as if a part of her had just awoke, and Sebastian hated Rawlings for being the cause.

****

Watching and waiting was all he was good for. The sound of Emma’s laughter made him clench his fists against his gloves.

She was his.

Plain and simple.

His plan was taking longer than necessary, but that was of no consequence. What was important was that the pawns he used continued to play their parts, oblivious to the idea forming in his mind.

A plan to make her his regardless of the cost. Yes, he had discovered long ago he would manipulate to have her, steal to keep her, and kill all those who crossed him.

Patience was not his strong suit, but for Emma he would be tolerant. Besides, once the house party was finished, it would be over with, and after all these years, she would finally be his.

****

“You dance lovely.” The fact Sebastian was able to say the entire sentence without threatening some sort of death or bodily harm to her dance partner was somewhat extraordinary.

And then all at once he felt like jumping in front of a moving carriage. Emma’s face fell. The brilliant sparkle was gone and in its place all that was left was pain.

“Emma?”

She flashed him a smile and patted him on the arm, but he could tell she worked a little too hard to look excited.

The dancing soon ended. Sebastian never offered for her hand, partially because he didn’t want to upset her. His pride was the other reason. He wasn’t sure he could take the hit of her choosing Rawlings as a dance partner over him.

“I think I shall retire,” Emma announced.

“Would you like me to escort you to your room?” he asked, but she was shaking her head and pulling away from him, from the ballroom, from everything.

Why did he feel suddenly ill? That something was amiss?

****

Emma lied, she had to. There was no other reason for her behavior. She had wanted to prove to Rawlings so badly that she was the same girl, but in all honesty, she desperately needed to show it to herself.

To prove her sins of the past had not broken her spirit.

But the sad truth was, they had.

Her parents’ rejection as well as Rawlings’ abandonment had formed her into the woman she was today.

Again, she resolved to try harder to seduce Sebastian so she could at least once know what it was like.

Her thoughts and lamenting as she left Sebastian standing in the ballroom did nothing to fight off the sickening feeling of being in Rawlings’ arms. Something too familiar, a piece of her she had long forgotten still resided in those arms.

It was painful and it brought fear like she had never known into her life. The chance of discovery and horror of rejection was again her reality. For if Sebastian found out her secret she would have no one. No prospects.

It was risky, denying all the bachelors at the house party.

But all she wanted was him. It would be the death of her.

Suddenly, she didn’t want to go to bed. She wanted to think, she wanted to race, to let her hair flow free in the wind. Looking from left to right she slipped past the ballroom going in the opposite direction of her bedroom and nearly fainted with nervousness. She hadn’t even changed into a riding habit, meaning her legs would surely be exposed when she jumped onto Boxer. Then again it was dark and nobody was following her.

Slipping past the groom proved easy, considering he was absolutely foxed and snoring in the corner. Quickly, she saddled Boxer and fed him some oats before jumping onto his back. He neighed as if sensing her need for release and then she heard a throat clear.

“Just what do you think you are doing, Emma?” Sebastian’s face was more charmed than irritated. And then his eyes scanned her exposed calves and she could have fainted on the spot.

His eyes widened as he shot her a disapproving look.

“Get off that horse this instant, Emma. I will not allow you to gallop around like some…hoyden!”

“Allow me?” Emma challenged as she led Boxer next to him. “You won’t allow me? Well, thank God we aren’t truly engaged. I would hate to be in a relationship where a man had to allow me to do anything.”

Furious, she kicked at Boxer and galloped off to the sound of Sebastian cursing her in every language possible.

Within minutes she was free of the house and moving quickly into the forest. Laughter bubbled out of her despite her irritation at Sebastian’s controlling manner. She told herself he was merely trying to protect her, but of all the things to say, did he have to demand she not ride?

Halting, she let out a sigh and then nearly fell off the horse as a sound behind her caused her to jump. Turning, she saw Sebastian’s form on another one of the horses, approaching her at a breakneck pace.

“Blast,” she cursed, then set Boxer off into a straight run through the trees, which wasn’t at all safe, she realized, as Sebastian had to continually fall behind lest he and his beautiful horse run into a tree.

“Stop this instant!” he yelled, and for some reason it made her laugh.

“Emma! This is insane!”

She didn’t see the tree in time. She pulled on the reigns making Boxer rear, sending her flying to the ground.