The Row(80)

“What did he say?” I’m not sure if I want to know.

“They received preliminary forensic results back on the scarf Stacia wore into the station,” she answers, and her grip on my hand tightens. “They’ve matched it to all of the murders; it has DNA from five different people. They believe it was the weapon used on all of the women.”

I don’t know what to say. I can’t speak and I can’t seem to figure out what kind of response she is looking for from me. Finally, I come up with something truly profound. “Wow…”

“Chief Vega said that he and the DA had a judge issue an emergency stay of execution, and they have a hearing scheduled with the DA and a judge on Friday. If the results come back like they’re expecting, your father’s conviction will be overturned.” Mama blinks a few times as if she can’t even believe the words she’s saying herself. “It sounds like—like he’ll be exonerated, Riley. He may be released in less than a week.”

I try to swallow but I can’t, and I actually feel light-headed. No response I can give would be adequate. I’d honestly given up hope on ever getting Daddy exonerated. At some point over the last few years, I’d settled for just hoping that they wouldn’t go ahead with killing him.

And now with this stunning news, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry … or both at once. On the one hand, Daddy may be released from Polunsky. I won’t have nightmares about his treatment, the food, or the other inmates anymore. I won’t have to worry about him anymore.

On the other hand, I’ve learned so much in the last couple of weeks. I won’t be able to forget it, no matter how hard I try. How can I go back to respecting and honoring him when I’ve learned that he’s never been the man I’ve built him up to be?

Can I trust him not to cheat on Mama again? Can she?

What if she decides he can’t come back here at all? Would that be better?

I tighten my grip on Mama’s hand and put on a smile, vowing to myself that wherever Daddy ends up, I will make sure he never hurts Mama again.

And who knows? Hopefully he’s learned his lesson from his time in prison. Eleven and a half years served for crimes he didn’t commit should at least buy him a fresh start, right?

Mama still watches me, waiting for my response, so I say the only thing that is completely, one hundred percent true.

“I can’t believe this is actually happening.”

*

After an extensive reminder of the rules for having Jordan over, Mama leaves for her job interview. When I come back to the living room, I see Jordan poring over a page from his notes on the East End Killer case again. I’m certain the only reason Mama hasn’t taken our notes away already is because she doesn’t know where I hide them.

He’s studying something so intently that he doesn’t even realize that I’ve come back. Something about Jordan waiting until I leave to pull out the notebook rubs me the wrong way.

“Hey,” I say quietly, and he jumps. Seeing him close the notes immediately only increases my irritation. “What are you doing?”

“Just double-checking a couple of things.” He’s deliberately vague as he watches me, then he tries to change the subject. “Want to watch more of this show?”

“No,” I answer softly, knowing that with Daddy coming home soon, we’re going to have to sort this out sooner or later. “Is there anything that can convince you that he didn’t do it?”

Jordan sighs and hangs his head. “Are you convinced?”

“Yes!” I answer immediately, deliberately avoiding taking any time to think. “She had the trophies and the murder weapon. She confessed!”

He whispers so softly that I barely hear him. “So did he.”

I flinch, feeling like he smacked me. “I never should have told you.”

“No.” Jordan looks up now. He keeps his words quiet, but I see a steely resolve in his eyes. “You should have told everyone.”

“You’re just biased!” My voice feels like it’s rising in volume and I can’t stop it. Daddy’s possible release has me scared and excited and angry, and Jordan is providing me with the perfect punching bag to take all those mixed-up emotions out on. “He may have done a lot of awful things, Jordan, but he isn’t a killer.”

“How can you know that? How can you even believe you really know him after everything we’ve learned?” He points at me with the corner of his notebook, and I rip it from his hands.

“Apparently, I know him better than I know you!”

Jordan reaches his hands up and pushes his hair out of his face. I can see his frustration growing, but I don’t care. Can’t he see that the last thing I need is his questions on top of my own right now?

He looks me dead in the eye, and I see something else in his face now. Fear. “What if you don’t know him at all? What if they release him out on the streets and he hurts someone else? What if this time it’s your mom … or you?”

“I guess we’ll find out soon, because your dad called to say that he’ll likely be released next week!” I spit out the last word so hard that a dark strand of my hair swings in front of my face.

My words obviously shock him because a full twenty seconds pass before he replies. “This isn’t some game we can keep playing anymore, Riley.”