The Renegade (The Moorehouse Legacy #3)(32)

“Do you have any protection?” he asked.

Now that fazed her. Brought some reality into the dim room.

“Um, no, I don’t. But I’m not…I’m clean.” She hadn’t been with anyone since Reese. And after she’d found out he was cheating, she hadn’t made love with him, either. That was two years ago. But there was another aspect to safe sex, wasn’t there? “And I…I won’t get pregnant.”

“They tested me for everything when I was in the hospital.”

She gripped the edge of the towel. The implications of what they were going to do were suddenly very clear. Too clear. She backed away.

Alex followed, coming up to her and putting his hands to her face. His expression was harsh, but he was so very gentle as he sank his fingers into her hair and fanned it out along her shoulders. His eyes traced the waves as if he were memorizing how they looked. Then his head tilted down.

Giving up the fight, she opened her mouth, ready for his kiss, but he went for her earlobe, sucking on it, catching it between his teeth and tongue. He moved her around slowly until she felt something hit the backs of her calves. The bed. She let herself fall onto the mattress, and he eased himself down so he was lying side by side with her. There really wasn’t enough space for them both, and his thigh moved up over her legs so he didn’t fall off. The weight was daunting. And delicious.

She let go of the towel and found the lip of the fleece he was wearing. Sliding her hand inside, she felt hard muscle and soft skin. He surged at the contact, his legs shifting as he suddenly rolled on top of her. She parted for him, embracing him with her thighs.

His lips drifted down to the edge of the towel. With hands that shook, he pulled the thing off her and pitched it to the floor.

Alex stared at her breasts for so long she wondered if there was something wrong with them. When she lifted her hands to cover herself, he shook his head and pressed his lips to the valley at her sternum. His hand drifted up and caressed her, narrowing in until the tips of his fingers passed over one taut nipple. She gasped and arched and his mouth latched on to her, suckling, tugging sweetly.

Pleasure broke and she dragged her hands through his thick hair. His hips drove forward, his hardness pressing into her through his jeans, and then he moved to the side. His palm swept down her belly and on to her hip. When it moved to the inside of her thigh, the nerves kicked in.

They were moving so fast. It was all happening so—

He found where she ached, touching her delicately with his big hand. As she shuddered from the heat, she looked up into his face. His eyes were closed, his expression rapt.

Without asking, he knew how she liked to be stroked and parted and circled. It wasn’t long before she was crying out his name, trembling in the throes of the sensations he gave her. She gripped him and threw her head back, the pulsating release coming up on her fast and lingering for a long time.

When she drifted back into her body, she opened her eyes. Alex was looking down at her. Remote.

She frowned, wondering if she’d turned him off with her intensity. It had sure surprised her. She glanced down his body. No, he was definitely still aroused. But he was motionless.

“Alex? Are you…do you want to…”

For a crushing moment she thought he was going to leave. But then he shifted and she heard a zipper.

When he mounted her, the blunt feel of him brushing against her core made her dizzy, and her whole body tingled with anticipation. He entered her slowly, inching inside, a thick presence that took up all her inner space. When their hips met, he paused.

His body trembled so badly, the bed frame rattled.

“Alex? Are you okay?”

His arms came around her as he buried his head in her neck. He pulled back and then gently slid inside again.

She latched on to his shoulders, holding on tight, as sensation built inside of her again. The feel of him was incredible, his heavy weight, that hard length, his slow, flowing movements.

But then he stopped, and withdrew abruptly.

He got off the bed and turned away, doing up his pants.

Seeing him fully clothed while she was naked kicked off a cold tidal wave in her veins and illuminated some particulars that she’d missed.

He hadn’t kissed her. He hadn’t even been naked with her.

And he hadn’t been able to finish.

Cassandra was dressed and out the door in a minute and a half.

The fact that he didn’t stop her, didn’t say a word, wasn’t a surprise. He hadn’t talked to her during the sex, either. Except for that clinical safety conversation.

Had they even had sex?

She ran to the Range Rover, fired the thing up and threw it in reverse. As she hit the gas, she realized she’d left her cell phone and clipboard in the shop.

Yeah, like she was going back in there tonight.

As the Rover’s headlights swung around, they pierced the picture window. Alex was sitting at the desk, head in his hands.

He looked as if he were…sobbing.

She was so struck by his utter dejection, her foot eased up on the gas.

But then it hit her.

Of course he feels awful, she thought.

He’d just cheated on his Miracle woman, the one he loved, hadn’t he?

*

Alex didn’t know how long he sat in the chair, blinking back tears he refused to let fall.

Crying wasn’t only a worthless thing to do. It was another kind of self-serving release he refused to let himself have.