The Other Einstein(71)

Keeping one hand on me, he skimmed it quickly. “So you know?” He let out a sigh that almost sounded like relief.

How dare this be a relief.

Something sprung loose in me. “How could you! After Anna, after all your promises in the Engadine Valley, how could you betray me again! And with your cousin.”

“You drove me to it, Mileva. With all your disappointed looks and dark moods. When I was back in Berlin over the Easter holidays last year, how could I not be attracted to Elsa’s lightness?”

Berlin. Easter. Elsa. The worsening in his heartlessness. It all made sense.

I started to screech and wrenched free from his hold. Drawing closer to me, he gripped my shoulders and muttered, “Don’t make a scene in front of the boys.”

Squirming away from him, I lunged for the door, but he held me down firmly. I wriggled my hands out of his grasp and shoved him off of me. He grabbed me again, and I slapped his hands away.

Hands and arms flew until I felt the force of his hand fully upon my face. Like a slap. Whether accidental or intentional, I didn’t know. All I could think about was the pain.

I sunk to my knees, hands on my face. The pain was nearly as intense as the childbirth that had wrecked my body. It seared so badly I could barely breathe, let alone sob. Warmth trickled down my cheeks. I looked at my palms. They were crimson with my blood.

Two sets of little feet pattered down the hall.

“What’s wrong, Mama?” Hans Albert cried out, fear and concern bubbling up in his voice.

“It’s all right, boys. Mama will be okay,” I answered, quickly placing my hands over my face again. The boys would likely become hysterical if they saw the blood streaming down my face.

Tete whimpered, “Mama’s hurt,” and started to creep toward me.

I didn’t want the boys to see what Albert had done, so I stood up and said, “No, no. Mama is just fine, just…just…a bad toothache. I’m going to lie down in my bedroom until it passes, all right?”

I was halfway down the hallway when I heard Albert say to the boys, “Let’s just write a little note to the Hurwitzes to explain that we cannot come for the recital tonight because Mama has a toothache. Then we will have some more cake, okay?”

As I took refuge in my room, one of Newton’s basic laws of motion crept into my mind unbidden: the law told us that an object will continue on a particular path until a force acts upon it. I had continued on the fixed path as Albert’s wife for years, but now three forces acted upon it that I couldn’t ignore—Marcel, Elsa, and Albert’s hand on my face. Surely, the path must alter.

Izgoobio sam sye. I was lost. But I could no longer afford to be.





Part III


   To every action there is always opposed an equal reaction: or the mutual actions of two bodies upon each other are always equal, and directed to contrary parts.

   Sir Isaac Newton





Chapter 36


March 15, 1913

Zürich, Switzerland

The knock echoed throughout the apartment. My hand froze in midair, and I stopped scrubbing the pots. My stomach churned. Who could it be? I wasn’t expecting anyone. I considered not answering, but the boys were playing loudly, and the person outside the door could certainly hear them.

Cracking open the door, I peeked through the slit. It was Mrs. Hurwitz and her daughter, Lisbeth, the closest things to friends I had in Zürich. By God, what was I going to do?

“Hello, Mrs. Einstein. We missed you last night and wanted to see how you were feeling. You know, with your toothache.” Mrs. Hurwitz spoke through the crack.

“Thank you so much for coming,” I answered without opening the door any wider. “I’m still in pain, but I’m able to manage the children.”

“Can we come in and help?”

“No, we are doing fine, but many thanks for your offer.”

“Please, Mrs. Einstein?”

How could I decline to open the door? Which would be worse to circulate around the Zürich academic circles: the peculiar tale of Mileva Einstein—already considered recalcitrant and strange—refusing to open her home to social callers, or the story about my bruised and swollen face? The blame for one would fall on me; the blame for the other would fall on Albert.

I chose Albert.

“Of course, please forgive my rudeness,” I said as I unlatched the door and opened it for the Hurwitzes to enter. “I wasn’t expecting visitors, so I’m still in my housedress. My apologies.”

The women gasped when they entered the foyer. “Oh, Mrs. Einstein, your face!” Mrs. Hurwitz exclaimed, her hand covering her mouth in horror.

Instinctively, I shielded it from view. “Not pretty, I know. Toothaches can be grueling. You understand why I couldn’t come to your gathering last night.”

The women were quiet and staring at me. They knew perfectly well that my face didn’t look like this because of a toothache. No toothache in the world would batter its owner in this manner. Papa would strangle Albert if he saw me right now.

“Can I get you ladies some tea and cake? I just pulled a strudel from the oven,” I stammered into the silence.

Mrs. Hurwitz recovered herself and said, “No thank you, Mrs. Einstein. We wouldn’t want to trouble you. Particularly in your state. We simply wanted to make certain you were all right.”