The Lost Souls (The Holy Trinity #2.5)(46)

“You are a disgusting whore!”

“What about you?”

“What about me? I was alone for months! Alone while you were busy cheating on me!”

“Listen to me, Trinity,” he growled. “You are my wife. I’m not gonna let you forget that. And we are gonna work this shit out.”

“I don’t want to be your wife anymore,” she hissed.

“Why? So, you can feel better about f*cking Gerik?”

“No!” She twisted her body, and he gripped her tighter. “I wish I’d never started up with you! I wish I’d listened to everyone when they told me I belonged with Gerik!”

He closed his eyes and tried to breathe through the pain of that statement, reminding himself that she didn’t mean it. She was trying to hurt him because she was hurting.

“I know you, Trin,” he said quietly. “And I know you don’t f*cking mean that.”

“Fuck you,” she hissed. “You don’t know shit about me!”

Frustrated, more than done with this shit, he released her. Shoving her off him, he got to his feet. “When you’re ready to talk, fat?, you come find me.”

He started for the door. “It’s not going to happen!” she screamed as he pulled it open.

Xan shut the door softly behind him. His hands were shaking, and his heart was pounding.

His tat? had left. His own father hadn’t wanted him. His mam? was a cold, distant bitch who’d loved him, yeah, but she’d had some funny ideas as to how to show it, and now she was dead and gone. He’d forever been a jackass in a clan full of thoroughbreds, magic users who could have ended him with a wave of their f*cking hand. But he’d worked hard to make sure he could protect himself from any kind of threat—be it Gaje or Romani or magic.

Fast forward to the end of the f*cking world, he’d met the only person who could have ever made him second-guess his lifestyle, his choices, as well as who and what he’d been.

And he’d betrayed her.

And by doing so, he’d lost her forever.

“Xan!”

“Xan!”

Turning, he found Pesha and Simionce running full speed toward him. Immediately, he reached for his guns, looking past them, seeking a threat.

“Marko!” Pesha said breathlessly as he skidded to a stop in front of him. “Is here!”

Frate pointed toward the fire pit and sure enough, Marko-f*cking-Siwak was here.

“What the f*ck is he doing here?” he spat, gripping his handgun tighter.

Pushing both Pesha and Simionce out of his way, Xan stalked forward, aiming at Marko.

Noticing him for the first time and seeing the gun in his grip, Marko quickly shoved the blonde Gaje behind him in a protective maneuver.

“Xan!” Mira yelled, hoisting Michaela up over her shoulder. “No killing in front of the baby!”

“Why would you think you could come here?” Xan yelled, ignoring Mira. “What inside that f*cked-up brain of yours, frate, would make you think that coming here was a good idea?”

“Xan!” Fifi yelled, stepping in front of Marko. “Let him explain!”

Explain?

Explain why he’d left Trinity in the middle of a world where the only thing certain was death?

Explain why he’d single-handedly destroyed his marriage to Trinity in a fit of jealous rage? Fuck that! Marko couldn’t explain that!

“You have three f*cking seconds, frate,” Xan growled, “to get the hell out of my camp before I blow your damn head off.”

“I had to come,” Marko said. “I had to find Trinity, to make sure she was okay, to bring her home to you.”

“Bullshit!” Xan spat.

Marko shook his head. “I swear it, frate.”

“Yeah? If that’s true, then now you know she’s fine, and I’m already with her, so you can turn your ass around.”

“She’s not fine,” Marko said. “Is she acting weird, Xan? Is she acting like Trinity? Or is something wrong?”

“Is something wrong?” Xan yelled, his patience gone. “Yeah, something is wrong! She spent months trying to survive on her own, only to get tossed aside by you!”

“Something else,” Marko persisted. “Like Gerik turning into a dragon and losing his soul because of it?”

Xan stared at him. “What?”

“Gerik is gone,” Marko said. “He’s a dragon, frate. A dragon, not an animal. He’s a soulless beast, according to the legends. Gerik lost his soul the moment his transformation was complete, meaning Trinity lost hers, too.”

Xan’s stomach lurched, and panic reared up inside him. “What?” he whispered. “No, you can’t survive without a soul, everyone knows that. If she didn’t have a soul, she would be dead and she’s not dead.”

No, she wasn’t dead, but she wasn’t Trinity anymore either. Remnants of her still remained, glimpses that were becoming few and far between. So, no, she wasn’t dead.

But she was…dying?

No. Oh, hell no.

“No,” Xan repeated, shaking his head wildly. “No f*cking way is she dying, because I’m not losing her again.”

She didn’t need that damn soul, a soul that had always belonged to Gerik. She still had her heart, it was still beating, and that heart belonged to him. And, f*ck it, he could not lose her again.