The Heir (The Selection #4)(53)

I loved my dad.

But I also loved myself.

And I would have to live with me much longer.

“You don’t have to say yes or no,” Ean said, drawing me back to the moment. “I’m simply saying that I’m here if you need me.”

I nodded. “I can’t say if I’ll even consider it.” I stood. “For now let’s continue our ride. I don’t get to see my Butterscotch nearly enough.”

And we did ride for quite a while longer, but Ean didn’t speak much. It was comfortable in a way not to be burdened with the need to make conversation. Ean would take my silence gratefully. I wondered if that could last, if he would eventually tire of that kind of life.

For the time being I studied him. Handsome, proud, straightforward. His confidence didn’t hinge on my approval, and I knew I wouldn’t worry about receiving his. I could possibly be married without actually feeling like I was. . . .

He might be a very attractive suitor, indeed.





CHAPTER 22


I SENT EAN IN SHORTLY thereafter, and he didn’t protest at all, maybe proving right away that he would be as compliant as I needed him to be. It was certainly an interesting proposition, though I’d have to get much further along in this process before I could know if I’d need to use it or not.

Too soon, I had to get ready for dinner, so I put Butterscotch away and took a brush to my boots. I wasn’t terribly dirty. “Night, night,” I whispered to my horse, slipping her a piece of sugar before heading back to the palace.

“Eadlyn!” someone called as I entered the palace.

It was Kile. He was talking with Henri, Erik, Fox, and Burke. He gave the others a sign to wait for him and jogged down the hall to me.

“Hey,” he said, his crooked smile settling on his face. He looked a little nervous.

“How are you?”

“Good. I was talking with some of the guys, and we have a proposal for you.”

I sighed. “Another one?”

“Huh?”

“Nothing.” I shook my head to clear it. “Should I come speak to them now?”

“Well, yeah, but I wanted to ask you something first.”

“Sure.”

Kile stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Are we okay?”

I squinted. “Kile, you realize you’re not actually my boyfriend, right?”

He chuckled. “Yeah, I do. But, I don’t know, I liked having someone to show my designs to and laugh with, and I wanted to come check on you after I heard about Jack, but I was afraid you wouldn’t want to talk about it. Then I was afraid that staying away would make you upset, too. Do you know how difficult you are?”

“I’d forget, but you keep reminding me!” I teased.

Kile fidgeted. “I’ll ease up. But seriously, are we okay?”

I watched as he bit his lip, and I had to fight myself from daydreaming about them. He said he was here for me, so I hoped, maybe, I’d get to feel those lips again.

“Yes, Kile. We’re okay. Don’t worry so much.”

“All right. Come over here. I think you’re going to like this idea.”

We turned and walked down to the cluster of boys waiting. Henri immediately kissed my hand.

“Hello today,” he greeted, making me laugh.

“Hello, Henri. Burke, Fox. Hi, Erik.”

“Your Highness,” Burke began. “Maybe this is a little out of line, but we were thinking that the Selection is a very challenging time for you.”

I chuckled. “You have no idea.”

Fox smiled. He and Burke looked a little comical next to each other. Burke was so burly, and he was so lean. “It has to be crazy. You have your work to do, and then you need to find time to do solo dates or try to get around to everyone at a party. It seems exhausting.”

“So we had an idea,” Kile said. “Could the four of us do something with you this week?”

This was completely brilliant. “Yes!” I exclaimed. “That would be great. Any ideas on what to do?”

“We were thinking about cooking together.” Burke’s face was so happy, I couldn’t say no, even though that was exactly what I wanted to do.

“Cooking?” I said, a fake smile plastered on my face.

“Come on,” Kile urged. “It’ll be fun.”

I exhaled nervously. “All right. Cooking. How about tomorrow night?”

“Perfect!” Fox said quickly, like he was worried I’d change my mind.

“Okay. Thursday, six o’clock. I’ll meet you in the foyer, and we can walk to the kitchens together.” This was going to be a nightmare. “If you’ll excuse me, I have to get ready for dinner.”

I headed upstairs wondering if there was any way to make this better. I doubted it.

“Neena,” I called, walking into my room.

“Yes, miss?”

“Can you start a bath? I need one before dinner.”

“Certainly.”

I wrestled with my boots and flung off my dress. Besides the simple giving and responding to orders, we hadn’t spoken much lately, and I had to admit, it was hard on me. My room was my retreat, the place I rested and sketched and hid from the world. Neena was a part of that, and her being upset with me set everything off-kilter.