The Girl I Was Before (Falling #3)(54)
“Hey, I’m sorry we barged in, man. Really—totally against this idea, but when Cass gets something in her head…” he says, and I chuckle.
“They’re twins. She gets shit in her head too, so I’ve learned,” I say, and there’s a certain fondness that settles in my chest thinking about Paige and all of her pain-in-the-assness. I hate that fondness.
Ty laughs at my observation, then moves to the table and brings the rest of the items over to help me clean up. Paige and Cass have moved into a weird yelling-whisper mode now, with hand gestures, and lots of tsking sounds and eye-rolls.
“So, how’d you two meet?” Ty asks, clearly accustomed to this type of situation between the two sisters.
“I work at a grocery store. I made her a sandwich, and the rest is history,” I say, smirking. It’s simple, but it’s true. I looked forward to her coming in when I knew she would, and sometimes, when she’d just stop in for her own things—not for the sorority—I’d have a little flash of a fantasy that she came in to see me.
Fuck, I’m in trouble. I’m pretty sure Ty knows too, because he’s grinning, his face a lot like my friend Casey’s when he’s right and I’m wrong—which doesn’t happen often.
“We’re going out tonight—happy hour at Sally’s. You should come. Maybe you can get that one there, to hang out with her sister. They need to do more of that,” he says. My smile comes without my permission, but I stifle it quickly.
I can’t go out. I spend my nights at home, with my daughter snoring on the other side of the hall…ready in case the bad dream comes, or worse, the one where she sees her mother’s ghost. But I nod indifferently, making him believe I might show up.
When I look back, Cass and Paige are standing. They’re not hugging, but they’re laughing. It’s like they both want to touch each other, show how much that bond is there, but there’s something awkward about it. I think Cass forgives Paige more than she realizes; she’s just waiting for Paige to make the first move.
Cass shakes my hand, and I notice how strong her grip is—I’m frankly not sure whose was stronger, hers or Ty’s. I shut the door behind them and ready myself to forgive Paige, to forget about everything from twelve hours ago.
“I can’t believe you told her I was here!” she launches into me. I actually laugh, because I’m a little dumbfounded. “And you—“
She takes a step closer to me, her finger actually touching my chest. This entire scene is getting more ridiculous by the minute. “You are not going to Sally’s tonight. You don’t need to be my sister’s friend, because this?” she says, waving her hand emphatically between the both of us. “This is a nothing thing! There isn’t an us for her to get to know—so just forget about whatever bond you’re thinking about making, okay?”
I stand silent, a little stunned; she loads her purse and backpack over her shoulders. Finally, when she does hit the stairs, I speak.
“Are you crazy? I mean…like, should I be concerned that you’re actually crazy? Because that…whatever you just did there?” I mimic her wave between us. “That was kinda crazy.”
She points her finger at me, and her body is actually shaking a little. “Your ass stays home tonight,” she says. I salute her when she turns around, and when I hear her door slam shut, I can’t help but laugh, hard.
My mom comes down just as I’m getting ready to head to class for the day, and I can tell that questions are still begging to be cleared off her chest. But Leah’s here, so I let my daughter throw me a block on this one. And then I get an idea.
“Hey, are you home tonight? Book club or anything?” I ask, my mom’s eyes squinting as she nods.
“I’m home,” she says, her glance sideways and suspicious.
“Would you mind if I go out, for just a few hours, after bedtime? Paige is trying to mend some bridges with her sister, and I get the sense she kind of wants my support,” I lie. I just lied to my mom, and I swear to god she knows. My lips are twitching, and I’m about to ruin it with a smile, when my mom agrees.
“I’ll be home,” she says, moving beyond me and gathering her lunch together with Leah’s for their day at the church. “You should go out more, you know? I can help with things. And it’s good for you. Maybe…maybe wear something nice.”
I wince when her innuendo hits my ear. As many questions as my mom has, she also likes the idea of a girl catching my interest. Which must mean there’s something about Paige that’s okay with my mom.
“Thanks,” I say, leaving before we get into any more detail. I plan on looking good. But I’m not going because I’m full of hope—I’m going because Paige is going to be ticked as hell when I show up.
Which…gives me goddamned hope.
Paige
If there is one thing I’ve always liked about Cass’s boyfriend, it’s his willingness to help me get drunk when I need to. There’s a very loose ID policy at Sally’s, and when Ty orders up rounds, the questions never seem to come. He’s twenty-two—and he’s in a wheelchair. If he wants a pitcher for the table, nobody’s arguing with him. Wrong as it is, it’s still a fact. And I’m cashing in on it tonight.