The Girl I Was Before (Falling #3)(105)

“Thank you,” I mouth.

“No problem,” she says, laughing as if I just said something funny. She leans forward as she stands and whispers, “I fix break-ups; it’s my thing. Now turn around and smile.”

I do as Rowe says, and am greeted by Paige stepping into the seat on the other side of me.

“I don’t think I like you two getting all chummy,” she says, handing me a giant pretzel wrapped in paper. “You looked hungry.”

I shake my head while I take my twisted bread from her, picking a piece off and stuffing it into my mouth. “I wasn’t,” I say, while chewing. “But I’ll eat it anyway.”

“Well, I needed something to buy, so you’re welcome,” she says. All I can do is laugh because she’s so cute, even when she’s flippant and thoughtlessly thoughtful. I love her, and I don’t care if she hits me. I’m telling her. Right. Fucking. Now.

My deep breath is loud, and she notices, her body growing a little rigid as if she can sense I have a speech coming. I wish she would just tell me what I was about to say, because right now, I haven’t got a clue. But I’m going to say some words, and they’re going to be honest, because that has always worked for me. Why change things up now.

“I have to go to work, and Paige, I’ve gotta leave in like five minutes, so please, just let me say this without interrupting,” I start, and she’s already blowing my request.

“You have to work?” She’s seriously repeating me, and it’s frustrating and funny all at the same time.

“Yeah, I have to work. So quit interrupting, so I can…”

“Then why’d you come?” she asks, and now she sounds sad, and all I want to do is let her interrupt like crazy for the next ten minutes before I have to leave. And then not leave. Then quit my job because making her happy is way better than my paycheck.

“I came to see you,” I say, shoulders up, nothing else to give. “I was supposed to spend the day painting Leah’s room, and I was supposed to fix some things around the house for my mom, but instead I had to hunt down my friend and make him fix the mess he made between us. Then…I ran into you, and you said to come to the game, so I came. I’ll always come. I’ll always pick you, Paige. Always…you.”

For once in the last five minutes she seems speechless, her sadness starting to look a little bit more like hope. This…is my opening.

“I’m just going to put it out there, Paige,” I say, holding my hand up, not even letting her say another word. “I’ve learned that life twists and turns on you, that unexpected shit falls in your lap, and sometimes it’s a blessing and other times it’s your worst nightmare. Through all of that, I’ve learned that wasting time missing out on the things that really matter is just that—a waste of time.”

I take a deep breath before this next part, because last time, it didn’t go so well. “I love you, Paige,” I say, waiting for a blip, gauging her reaction, bracing myself. Her smile is still in place, cautious as it might feel—so I continue. “I’m not expecting you to move back in, or marry me, or become some super stepmom. I just want you to love me back, however you can, and let me hold your hand and talk to you at night. All I want is to kiss you and untangle your purse when that strappy thing gets stuck in your hair.”

Her lips twist into a bigger smile, and she giggles when I tug on the purse strap that first got tangled in the trash can the night she tutored me. I love that purse strap, and I owe it a f*cking hell of a lot.

“I want to be the guy that you tell your secrets to—who’ll give it to you honest, and who won’t care if you give it right back,” I say, noticing that Rowe is hearing most of this a few rows away. I don’t care, because now Rowe is right up there with the purse strap for things I need to thank for bringing me Paige.

“Just…do me a favor, Paige,” I say her name and pull her hand into mine, the touch of it so amazing, her fingers shaking, but so damn soft. I breathe out once just from the feel of her. “Just…think about it, because I know what being all of that with me means. I know being some other guy’s girlfriend doesn’t come with that extra little caveat of all the other hats I have to wear—including the father one. But thing is, with anyone else, you’d just be their girlfriend, and with me…you’re kind of my world.”

I stand, letting her fingers fall away from mine slowly, and I tell her I love her one more time before letting her go. I walk away, and I’m taken back to my life more than five years ago, when I was just some cocky football jock who refused to let the pretty girl say no. I never thought anyone else would be worth all of that rejection, over and over, but this one…she’s worth walking through fire.

And I know she might make me.





Chapter 20





Paige



It didn’t take Rowe long to move back to the seat next to me. As soon as Houston turned the corner through the stadium gate, she was at my side. The look on my face must have been enough, because all she said was “Go.”

I left the game without even saying goodbye to my sister. She’d understand. Fuck, they probably all heard his speech. And I told Rowe she could tell them anything she wanted. If I put this thing with Houston and me out there, then that makes it real—and it’s so real. I’m ready for it to be real.