The Duke Meets His Match (The Infamous Somertons #3)(42)
“Please tell me,” Chloe implored.
“You must talk about your fears, even the worst of those,” Ben said.
“I’m not sure he will cooperate. My acquaintance blames himself for things he could not have changed. Decisions that were made for him.”
Ben sighed. “No solider wants to relive their most fearful memories of battle. I avoided it like the plague, but it did little to aid me and only served to make the nightmares worse. Your friend must face his fears, and the only way to do that is by talking about them. It may be difficult to speak about the worst days of your life, but it becomes easier over time. I was fortunate to have Mary and a fellow solider to talk to.”
“What happened to your other comrades who suffered from war sickness?” Chloe asked.
Ben shook his head regretfully. “They were not so fortunate, miss. The army sent two to the asylum. Both hung themselves within three months.”
Lord. It was just as her maid Alice had told her. The army must ship them off to asylums to die rather than attempt to heal its own soldiers. “I’m sorry.”
The thought of that happening to Michael made Chloe feel nauseated. Could she help him when she swore to stay away from him?
She could write him a letter explaining what she’d learned from Ben. She prayed he would take the advice or at least seek out other soldiers with similar conditions so that he wasn’t alone. But just as the thought occurred to her, she pushed it aside. In her heart, she knew it wouldn’t work. The duke was too proud to take written advice or to seek out other soldiers with similar conditions on his own. She’d have to visit him and convince him herself.
Could she do it? Could she go to his home, knowing the attraction between them was as strong as lightning. Could she resist him?
It was a risk. But she’d seen him suffer not once, but twice, and she felt a strong need to aid him.
She’d have to be careful sneaking out of Huntingdon’s house. She’d tell Michael what she’d learned, urge him to take the first steps to recovery, while maintaining a firm resolve to keep a physical distance between them. It was the best she could do. Anything else and it would be more than her reputation in jeopardy.
It would be her heart.
Chapter Seventeen
Chloe woke feeling more uncertain than ever. She’d spent the night tossing and turning in bed as sleep evaded her. She’d dreamed of Michael’s kiss, his strong hands caressing the soft skin of her thigh…the glorious feel of him pressed against her.
She’d finally fallen asleep only to wake at dawn in a sweat. Heart pounding, she kicked aside her twisted sheets and sat on the edge of her bed. Despite the risks, she’d made up her mind to try to help the Duke of Cameron.
Chloe slipped out of bed, stuffed her feet in slippers, and summoned her maid. She dressed quickly in a demure blue gown with embroidered rosettes at the bodice and hem. It was Thursday, her day to visit the orphanage, but for the first time she felt a pressing need to visit another destination first. A short carriage ride later, she arrived at the Berkeley Square mansion.
Her knock was answered quickly. Surprisingly, the duke’s butler, Hodges, did not look down on her with haughty disdain when he opened the door to find her on the doorstep.
“Good day, miss,” he said as he held the door open for her.
She marveled at the butler’s change in demeanor. He was quite hospitable and treated her with respect, but when she handed him her cloak, something about his expression gave her pause. He opened his mouth, then shut it, as if unsure what to say, when the housekeeper, Mrs. Smith, walked into the vestibule, followed by an older gentleman with bushy eyebrows and a slightly protruding brow. He was carrying a black bag.
“Miss Somerton! It’s good to see you.” Mrs. Smith turned to the man by her side. “This is Dr. Graves, the duke’s physician. Doctor, this is Miss Somerton.”
Apprehension made the hair on Chloe’s nape rise. Was someone in the household ill? Was it Michael?
Dr. Graves acknowledged Chloe with a brief nod. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss Somerton. Please excuse me, as I have another appointment this morning.” Hodges offered his hat and cane, and the physician departed.
“It’s good you’re here,” Mrs. Smith said.
The knot in Chloe’s stomach tightened. Something was amiss. “Is the duke well?”
Mrs. Smith lowered her voice. “He’s had another fit. We summoned Dr. Graves straightway. He left a sedative, but the duke refuses to take it.”
Chloe stepped toward the winding staircase that led to the second floor.
“He’s not in his bedchamber, miss,” the housekeeper said. “He’s in his study, and he refuses to leave and barks at anyone who tries to enter.” She wrung her hands. “He’s a good man, but he threatened to sack any member of the staff who disturbs him, and we’re fearful of him when he has these tirades. It’s almost as if he still thinks he’s fighting the war.”
Chloe wasn’t entirely certain what the housekeeper meant. How could the duke’s staff believe he thought he’d returned to war? Had he donned his uniform, loaded his pistols? Was he marching back and forth across the room?
“I’ll see to him,” Chloe said.
Hodges stepped forward, but Chloe raised a hand. “I know the way, and it’s best if I’m alone.” She hurried down the hall. She knew exactly where the study was, since it was where she first met Michael when she’d visited his home weeks ago.