The Allure of Dean Harper (The Allure #2)(54)

I held onto the fact that I hadn’t cried in front of him. I convinced myself that the insults I’d flung had been well-worded. I wanted my barbed words to sink deep and fester inside him. I still had a thousand things I wanted to yell, but it was done. Dean was in his house and I was walking home alone with wet hair and wet cheeks. I skipped the subway and ignored the cabs. I walked until my feet hurt and I used the burn in my legs to distract me from the burn in my heart.

My phone was silent the entire way home. No text messages, no phone calls. Dean didn’t run out after me and he didn’t care enough to know if I made it home okay.

I was relieved to find the apartment empty. I tore at my clothes, tossing them into the trash on the way to the bathroom. They were sweaty and filled with memories I wanted erased by the morning. I turned on the shower and stepped inside. I squeezed shampoo over my scalp once, and then again, trying to expunge the scent of Dean.

I lathered myself in body wash from the top of my head to the tips of my toes and let it linger before washing it away with scalding water. I brought my arm to my nose and sniffed, feeling my heart break when I still smelled him there. His masculine scent overpowered my flowery body wash. I cried and scraped at my skin, sliding down to the floor of the shower. My fingers scrubbed furiously as I let his words haunt me.

I never made you any promises.

For all the progress we’d made, he still treated us like a contract that hadn’t been signed. I cried and let the water blend with my tears. The salty mixture disappeared past my lips as I curled into a ball.

I just wanted to get his scent off me.

I wanted to get him off me.

I wanted him gone.





Chapter Forty-Five


Dean





I let Lily walk out of my apartment and I stood there frozen. I was pushing her away for good; I knew it, and I couldn’t stop myself. Lily was a distraction at best and a liability at worst. I would have picked up on cues that something was amiss with Hunter had Lily not soaked up my attention during staff meetings. Looking back, there'd been plenty of signs that Hunter had been up to no good. It had worked out in the end, but I wasn't going to make the same mistake twice. For the time being, my focus would remain on work.

…



Lily had walked out of my life the week before and I’d gotten more work done in those seven days than I had in months. I’d worked late every night and I’d have continued on like that forever, but the James Beard Awards wasn’t an event to skip. Every top chef, restaurateur, food critic, and journalist was in attendance, crammed into small red velvet seats awaiting the moment when the awards ceremony gave way to the cocktail hour. We’d all stand around for an hour or two ass-kissing the hell out of anyone we could manage to snag a minute with, but hopefully I’d be wearing a James Beard medal around my neck as I did it.

We’d already suffered through most of the awards, shit like Outstanding Baker and Outstanding Wine Program. I fidgeted in my seat and ignored the two guests seated beside me. According to the program, my award was next, and suddenly it was impossible to sit still.

A beautiful woman with dark, exotic features stepped out onto the stage to announce the nominees. I vaguely recognized her from a cooking show, but there were too many to keep track of to know for sure. She stood behind the mic with a gold-leafed envelope clutched beneath her bright red nails.

“The nominees for the James Beard Award for Outstanding Restaurateur are three individuals that each have a finger on the pulse of American cuisine. These three nominees have set high national standards in restaurant operations and entrepreneurship.”

I straightened my bowtie and leaned forward in my seat. I knew the cameramen would flash my face across the giant screens flanking the stage, but I didn’t paste on a fake smile. I was too focused on the announcer’s words.

“Our first nominee is Rob Villarreal. Rob has opened countless successful restaurants in the heart of Seattle. His restaurants are youthful and full of the spirit of the city.”

Rob Villareal had invested in Starbucks early and used his money to open shitty restaurants. If he won, I’d never drink Starbucks again.

“Our second nominee, Victor Keller, has established himself as the restaurant god of Las Vegas. He operates five restaurants along the Strip, one of which, La Viva, has placed in the top 50 restaurants in the world three years in a row.”

Victor Keller was a hack. He had his nose so far up the ass of the restaurant world it was a wonder he hadn’t shown up at the awards with pink eye.

“Our final nominee, Dean Harper is an up-and-coming restaurateur, making his mark in New York City one inventive restaurant at a time. In a climate where most restaurants rely on stifling traditions or flashy gimmicks, he focuses on fresh, innovative flavors and contemporary designs to set his restaurants apart from the competition.”

My heart was beating out of my chest as she ripped open that envelope. I wanted to grip someone’s hand, but the Asian mom to my left was staring down at her program, and the man to my right was too busy checking his iPhone to notice my nerves.

“And the winner of the James Beard Award for Outstanding Restaurateur goes to…” She smiled and paused to make eye contact with the audience. I was going to have a heart attack if she didn’t say the name soon. “Dean Harper! The youngest winner of the Outstanding Restaurateur award in history!”