Teach Me Dirty(78)

“How is that even possible?”

“Well, I sucked him off. Does that count as a half?”

She smirked. “I guess that counts as a half.”

She handed me the coat from over her arm, and I put it on as she lit up a cigarette. But I was hot, even in the winter air I was hot. I led her to the picnic bench and climbed on up, and I was proud, pointing out the view like this was my spot, my special spot, but she wasn’t all that interested.

“So,” she said. “Was he good? He’s kind of old, did he come like super quick and start drooling?”

I poked my tongue out. “No, he didn’t come super quick and start drooling.”

She stared at me like I was an alien. “I can’t believe you’ve ditched the big V. I honestly thought it would be Harry doing the honours.”

“I’m so glad it wasn’t.” I closed my eyes and I was smiling and I couldn’t stop.

“Jeez, Hels, look at you. Anyone would think you’d won the bloody lottery or something, not bagged an old teacher.”

“I’d rather this than win the lottery.”

“You’re crazy.”

“I’m not.” I laughed. “He’s the best thing in the world. Everything I wanted. Everything I thought he’d be. More than I thought he’d be.”

“And now you have to go back to being his little student? How are you gonna pull that off?”

I shook my head. “I’m not going to pull it off. We’re together now, I just have to pretend at school, but outside of it…” I could hardly believe the words. “Outside of it he’s mine. He’s really mine.”

And Lizzie smiled, and she tried so hard for it to be a real smile, I know she did. “That’s so great, Hels. That’s really great.” She pulled me into a hug. “I’m so happy for you.”

“You are? You really are?”

She squeezed me. “I really am.”

But she wasn’t. She looked sad, like I’d poked her in the heart or something. She stared at the river and smoked and kept that smile on her face.

“Are you ok, Lizzie? How are things with Scottie?”

“Good,” she said. “Amazing. I’ll probably see him tomorrow, you know. I think we’re going to hang out and have lots of sex, and he’ll probably f*ck me in the ass again. It’ll be hot.”

I smiled. “That’s cool.”

“Yeah, it’s cool.”

“Is your mum home?”

Lizzie stiffened, and she threw her cigarette butt on the floor and lit up another. “No. Probably Monday.”

“Ray having his mates round?”

“Dunno. Probably.”

“You can stay at mine if you like.”

“Thanks, Hels, but Scottie, and you’re with Roberts now and…”

“You’re my best friend, Lizzie, the bestest of the bestests. You can stay over. I’m still going to be here, like all the time. I can’t even see him that much with studying.”

“You’ll see him,” she said. “You’ll see him all the time. These things, they just take over, you know?”

“Not you and Scottie. That hasn’t taken over. Why do you think my thing will be any different?”

She looked away from me. “It just will.”

I rested my head on her shoulder, until she gave in and put her arm around me. “I love you, Lizzie. That’s never going to change. Not ever. We’ll be dorm buddies, and hang out together, and you’ll be my best friend for all time.”

“Promise?” she said.

I gave the stupid finger symbol that she’d made up for me. “I swear, on pain of death, or never having Mr Roberts’ beautiful, beautiful cock inside me ever again for the rest of time, that I, Helen Palmer, will always be your best friend, Lizzie Thomas. Amen.”

And she laughed and handed me her cigarette. “Bestie’s honour?”

“Bestie’s honour.”

She kissed my cheek and gave a funny sigh, and for just a second I thought I saw her wipe a tear away.

“Right, Helen Palmer, you’d better take it from the top and tell me everything. And I mean everything.”

I told her everything.

***

I felt different as I walked through the front door. Like I’d aged twenty years.

Katie came charging out with a handful of chocolate, and half of it was smeared over her face.

“Some of this was yours, you didn’t mind sharing, did you?”

I smiled. “You can have it all.”

She did a little dance. “Yes! Katie for the win!”

I wondered where she even got half of this stuff from.

Mum was in the kitchen, and my heart tickled as I saw her there, stirring up a pot of stew for tea.

“Helen, love, I wondered when you’d be rolling in.”

“I was with Lizzie,” I said, but there was something in my voice, and I couldn’t stop it.

Mum was staring at me, I could feel her staring. And then she hurried past me and shut the door to the kitchen so nobody else could hear her.

“You’ve been with your boyfriend, haven’t you?” she said, and she was smiling. “You can tell me, love.”