Sweet Caroline(51)

“Okay, well . . .” Gee, I’m nervous. I didn’t think this would be so embarrassing. “First of all, Jess, wherever Ray gets his information, he’s dead-on. J. D. is a great kisser.”

Jess flashes her palm for a high five. “You go, C.”

I slap her a light five. Not sure this is a real celebratory moment. “Yeah, well, as you know, kissing leads to other things—”

A bang and clank come from the ladies’ room, where Stu is still working and swearing. Jess and Elle lean back and stare toward the bathroom.

“What’s going on in there?” Jess asks.

“Stu Green, bathroom pipes, old plaster walls.” I point to Elle. “Hey, he’s single. Add him to the list.”

“What? No.” She leans and whispers. “Mean-machine Stu Green?”

In high school, he had a wicked mean streak, which unfortunately influenced my already angry brother.

I tap Elle’s paper. “He’s really nice now, and he’s eligible, fairly handsome, and I saw him without a shirt. Great abs. Come on, add him to the list.”

“All right, smarty britches, I’ll add him. Even though his potty mouth matches the toilets he fixes.” Elle grunts as she writes Stu Green . “But I’m not worried. There’s no way he can spell renaissance.”

“Fine, Stu’s on the list. Caroline, back to J. D. What’s up?” Jess props her elbows on the counter and chin in her hands.

“Yeah, well, he wants to stay ooover.”

Elle gasps. “What? He said that?”

Jess remains unchanged. “Can’t blame the guy, Caroline. He’s been there, done that, if you know what I mean, and you’re a very sexy, beautiful woman.”

Elle gapes at her. “So what, Jess? How does her beauty give him a free pass to the Caroline show?”

“It doesn’t, El. Bring it down a notch. I’m just not surprised.”

“So, what do I do?” I glance between Elle and Jess, who simultaneously answer.

“Tell him to take a hike.” Elle.

“Go for it.” Jess.

Hearing Jess’s response, Elle launches out into Incredulous-Indignation Land. “Jess, didn’t your mama raise you better? Caroline, no way. You’re willing to give it up for a good kisser?” She huffs. “What happened to the blue-light queen?”

“For crying out loud, El, she’s not fifteen anymore. And my mama raised me just fine.” Jess focuses on me. “You’re a grown woman. This is the twenty-first century. Do what you want.”

“Who cares what century it is? Some things do not change with age or time.” Elle shakes the knife at me. “If he wants you that much, why can’t he commit?”

“Ring and a date seem like a lot to ask,” I say. “I’m not sure I want those things from him.”

Fire flares in Elle’s eyes. “Oh, really? Then what’s the point of this discussion? Caroline, giving the most precious part of yourself, a one-time gift that can’t be undone or taken back had better be worth a heck of a lot more than a sleepover.”

Well, there’s a point.

Another crash resounds from the bathroom, and Stu bursts into the dining room, lugging a rust-stained, water-dripping toilet. He stops when he catches us staring.

“Afternoon, laa-dies.” He drops the once-white ladies’ throne right in the middle of the dining room. I gasp. Elle and Jess jump against each other.

“Stu, what are you doing?” I run around the counter. “You can’t put that nasty old toilet in the middle of the Café.”

“Don’t worry, Caroline, it’s only temporary.”

“Move it now, Stu. If the health inspector sees this—”

“Health inspector?” He clicks his tongue and winks, holding up crossed fingers. “He and I are like this.”

“Stu, come on, think of my customers.”

“You’re closed, Caroline.”

“Move the toilet.”

“Bossy.” Stu hoists the toilet and carries it out back.

Returning to my place behind the counter, I distract myself by rolling silverware for tomorrow’s business. “So, no sleepover.”

“No. Caroline, respect yourself.” This from Elle. Emphatically.

“I have to admit, she’s right, Caroline. If you’re not sure, wait. Please, don’t let J. D. talk you into something you’ll regret.”

I nod, still unsure. “Right. Right.” Truth is, it’s enticing and alluring to be wanted by someone like J. D. All-out handsome, sexy, built, macho with a little-boy cuteness.

After a moment of silence, Elle pounds the counter again with the end of the knife. “Are we done with Caroline? Good. Back to the meeting at hand.”

As she bangs her makeshift gavel, Stu rounds the kitchen corner. I rush to pour him a glass of iced tea. “Tea, Stu?”

“Yeah, Caroline, that’d be great. Hotter than blazes out there.”

“Say, Stu, the girls and I were arguing over a word.” I peek at Elle. “You wouldn’t happen to know how to spell renaissance, would you?”

“Renaissance, huh?” He lifts his chin in the air, eyes squinting. Elle snickers, and I hear a pencil scratching. “Great revival of art and literature in Europe, beginning in the fourteenth century, lasting well into the seventeenth. Launched the world into the modern era out of the medieval. R-e-n-a-i-s-s-a-n-c-e. Renaissance.”